No copyright infringement is intended.  Just borrowing these characters for a little while and returning them unharmed.  Credit and thanks to Mr. Dortort for creating such a memorable and lovable family.  This story follows “Mending Fences”, but can be understood without reading the aforementioned. 

 

 

Sacrifices

Part One:  Gifts

 

 

Joe sighed, mopping his forehead with the back of his glove as he leaned against the pitchfork.

 

“What’s the matter?”

 

He flinched and turned awkwardly around at the sound of his eldest brother’s soft voice.

 

“Hey, Adam.  I didn’t know that you had gotten back yet.  Any news?”

 

“Joe…don’t change the subject.  Your leg is still bothering you?”  Adam stepped closer, moving from the late afternoon sunlight into the shadows of the barn.  His warm golden eyes turned dark and unreadable as he approached.  However, Joe knew of his concern by the gentle tone of voice and the tentative touch of Adam’s hand on the back of his neck.  Joe wished again that Adam felt more comfortable with, well, with touch.  But he didn’t, and so Joe treasured each time that Adam did allow a hug or better yet initiated one.  It didn’t happen very often.

 

“Joe?”

 

He sighed again.  “Yes.  Adam, it still hurts some.  Mostly late in the day, like now.  Don’t tell, O.K?”  He looked pleadingly up into his brother’s eyes.  Adam still felt guilty about Joe’s accident up at the horse-breaking corral.  The subsequent infections had almost cost him his leg. 

 

It had been months before Doctor Martin would even let him walk around on it.  At the time of the accident, Adam had been ill also.  Exhaustion had complicated his influenza and had kept Adam confined to the house for weeks.  He and Joe had gotten much closer during that time of forced inactivity, and they had both been surprised to learn how much they enjoyed each other’s companionship.  Joe sorely missed Adam when the doctor had released him to go back to work.  Without Adam’s company, Joe’s recovery time seemed to slow to a crawl of long lonely days.  Lonely days punctuated by painful exercises designed to strengthen his leg.  At long last, Dr. Martin seemed satisfied that Joe’s leg was sound, but he was still limiting Joe’s activities.

           

Joe turned anxious eyes to his brother.  So far, he had managed to hide his end-of-the-day discomfort from the rest of his family.  What would Adam do—now that he knew?  He opened his mouth, but Adam laid a finger on his lips, stilling his tongue.

           

“As long as you follow Doctor’s orders, Joe—I’ll not bring it to Pa’s attention.”  Adam smiled as he began to loosen Sport’s cinch.  “And as to your earlier question…yes, we received news.  A telegram from Uncle John arrived this morning.  They’ll be in Reno on the 20th.  And they want us to meet them there.”

 

            Joe whooped, and Sport tossed his head, almost smacking Adam full in the face.

 

            “That’s tomorrow, Adam!!” Joe did a little shuffle dance, unaware that he’d almost caused his brother a broken nose or worse.

 

Adam glared at Joe, but then relented.  His face softened into a grin at his brother’s excitement.  Joe resumed mucking out the stalls enthusiastically, chattering non-stop.

 

            “Adam.  I don’t remember ever meeting Uncle John nor Aunt Abigail.  What are they like?  How old is Kathleen again?  Did you ever meet her?  What’s she like?  Adam! I can get my new boots at one of them big Reno stores, you think that Pa…”

 

            “JOE!”  Sport shied at Adam’s bellow, but calmed immediately as he continued brushing the young gelding.  “Joe.  I’ve never met Kathleen; she’s about Hoss’s age.  As to what they are like—it’s been a dozen years since they last visited, so I’d imagine that they have changed a bit, though not as much as we have…especially you and Hoss.  You were only two when they spent that Christmas here.”

 

            Adam allowed Joe’s continued comments and queries to wash over him unanswered as he remembered that Christmas when everything was still perfect.

 

************************************************************************

“Marie…everything is fine, love.  Stop fretting and sit down.  John and Abby will be very comfortable with all that you and Hop Sing have done to welcome them.”  Ben smiled tenderly down at his fidgeting mate.

 

“Benjamin.  I want it all to be just right for them.  I want…”

 

“…to make a good impression?  To make them feel at home?”

 

“Of course!  And we must…”

 

“Relax.  We must relax, Marie.  They will love you as I do.”

 

“Oh, Ben.”  She melted into his embrace, and he drew her down onto the settee as he captured her lips and stilled her hands with his.

 

A small body forced its way between them giggling happily.  “Mama.  Papa.  UP!  Joe up!”

 

It was Ben’s turn to sigh, but he smiled in response to his youngest son’s demand and lifted him to sit on his knee.

 

“Horsy, Papa!!”  More giggles brought laughter to both parents as they watched Joe’s hands grab his Pa’s sleeves, tugging on them like reins.  Ben’s knee jiggled faster in response, and two-year-old Joe screamed his delight.

 

Despite the noise, all eyes turned toward the front porch when Hoss rushed in, opening the door with such force that it rebounded off the sideboard.  They’s here!  Mama!  Papa!  Uncle John and Aunt Abigail are here!”

 

************************************************************************

 

“Adam…ADAM!”  Joe’s insistent voice caused Adam to shake himself from the memory and stare blankly at his younger brother. 

 

“What?”

 

“Adam.  Ain’t..”

 

“Aren’t.”

 

“Yeah.  Aren’t ya listening?  I said—have ya told Pa yet?”

 

“No.  I came straight in here to tend to Sport.  You…”

 

“About Sport.  Ya better switch sides.  You’ve been brushing him in the same spot for a long time.”  Joe studied his brother closely.  “What’s going through your head, brother?  You were…”

 

“Twelve years in the past, Joe.”

 

“Tell me.”  Joe leaned the pitchfork in the corner and walked carefully over to a hay bale near Sport’s stall.

 

Adam frowned briefly at the cautious steps.  He’d already promised Joe he wouldn’t tell, but he’d be sure to stop by Joe’s room tonight.  The kid slept like the dead.  He’d check out the boy’s leg with Joe being none the wiser.

 

Joe tapped his arm, and Adam looked down into his brother’s clear green eyes—so like Ma’s.

 

 “Adam.  Please tell me.  What was it like that Christmas?  Was it grand?  I mean, havin’ them here.  Did it make Pa happy?  Havin’ Christmas with his brother?  I reckon it would me.”

 

“Yes and yes, Joe.   It was ‘grand’; Ma and Aunt Abigail made it so for all of us.  Pa and Uncle John stayed up late most nights and told us stories of their boyhood, the scrapes they got each other into—and back out of..”

 

“Kinda like us?”

 

Adam and Joe turned to see Hoss in the doorway. 

 

Ya need ta continue this at the supper table brothers.  Pa sent me out to fetch ya.”

 

As the three made their way to the house, Hoss threw his arm around Joe, and Adam saw his middle brother shift Joe’s weight toward him, compensating for his weak leg.  Under the guise of affection, he had put himself in the place of a crutch for his small brother.  Joe leaned on Hoss’s arm and grinned up at him.  He knew what his soft-hearted brother was doing—taking care of him and protecting his pride at the same time.  Adam watched, marveling at both of them.

 

He and Pa had talked many times about his two younger brothers, sometimes with great frustration on his part.  They were like two halves of one perfect whole, they’d  both agreed, but Adam felt shut out by their closeness.  He’d bridled at his father’s gentle suggestion that he’d been the one to close the door, that he’d isolated himself from his brothers.  Adam stopped in the yard and watched the two of them walk on ahead.  Mismatched in size and personality perhaps, but both compensated for each other’s weaknesses with their own strengths.  He remembered Pa’s words again. ‘They humble me, son.  I see them and I am reminded of how I should be toward all men.  I need to be looking for ways to serve every one I meet with the gifts God has given me, and accept the help of my fellow man when and where I am weak.  Joe and Hoss have discovered this great purpose in life in each other, and I envy them.’

 

Adam had thought about that conversation for weeks before coming to the conclusion that his father was probably right—again.  He knew that his own inclinations toward self-reliance and self-control puzzled his brothers and kept them at a distance.

 

            Could he change?  Should he?  Did he want to risk it?

 

He had relished the conversations he and Joe had had while they’d been confined to the house.  His youngest brother’s enthusiasm was contagious, and they had spent many happy hours in conversation and games.  Joe made impulsive decisions to be sure, but he had a fine, quick mind.  When Adam took the time to listen—and he had nothing but time during the recuperative weeks—he found, to his delight, that Joe had sound reasons for his actions…most of the time.  He just made his decisions much more quickly that most people were comfortable with, including his oldest brother. 

 

During those weeks of illness, Adam had begun to see this brother as a young man, not the family baby who must be watched over constantly.

 

Joe glanced behind and caught Adam’s eye.  “Hey, Adam—come on, will ya?  Still have that telegram?  You’ve got news for Pa.  Don’t keep him waiting older brother.”

 

************************************************************************

 

Ben was kept waiting.  By the time Adam had washed off the trail dust and changed his shirt, Ben, Hoss and Joe had been at the table for ten minutes.  As Adam sat down, Hop Sing, who had been hovering behind Ben’s left shoulder, began muttering in Cantonese.  Joe smiled up at him sweetly, silently translating every word automatically as he had done for as far back as he could remember.  

 

He almost drowned in his milk, though, when Hop Sing glared at Adam while commenting on Ben’s growing bald spot.  From where the oriental man stood, he had an excellent view of said bare of hair area.

 

Joe finally lost it, spitting milk nearly to Adam’s plate as the cook continued to ramble on and on about how tardy-to-supper sons caused excessive paternal hair loss through said parent’s unnecessary fretting and worrying.

 

Joe choked and gasped, trying to catch his breath as Hop Sing went into greater detail and lamented each of the hair enhancing nutrients that were lost to Ben forever due to overcooked and cold food.  Food ruined by ungrateful sons…

 

Joe swallowed noisily between coughs as Ben patted him on the back with one hand while dabbing at the spit milk with his napkin.

 

“All right son?”  It still amazed Joe that none of his family understood Hop Sing’s native language.

 

Yes..yes sir.  I’m all right.”  I can’t look at Hop Sing now.  I can’t look at Hop Sing.  Just don’t look at him, Joe.  He made this silent vow, his eyes still watering.  When he could focus on something other than breathing, he kicked Hoss under the table and cut his eyes toward their elder brother.

 

Hoss rolled his eyes and poked Adam.  Elder brother took the hint, stopped staring in disgust at milk-spitting Joe, and produced the telegram.  Pa.  You got word from Uncle John.”

 

Ben clapped Joseph on the back one last time and then read the missive aloud.  When he was done, he passed it around the table for all of them to see.

 

“It seems as if your Aunt Abigail does not trust the stage past Reno.  They want us to meet them there tomorrow.”

 

“Why Pa?”

 

“She’s read too many articles in the San Francisco Sentinel about the dangers of stagecoach travel in this part of Nevada.”

 

“What?  If she doesn’t trust stage travel, then how are they getting to Reno, Pa?”

 

Puzzled, Hoss and Joe glanced at Adam, but elder brother just raised his eyebrows in the facial equivalent of a shrug.

 

Oblivious to this silent sibling communication, Ben continued.  “According to John’s last letter, she does trust the main stage line, which goes as far as Reno.  Those roads are well traveled and protected by the cavalry units along the way, but there have been too many exaggerated reports from imaginative journalists about Paiute raids in the mountain roads around Lake Tahoe.”  He rolled his eyes and laughed.  “John said that she’s even had several nightmares about them all being scalped.  He’s had to do some fast talking to get her as far as Reno.”

 

“Scalped?  By the Paiutes?”

 

“Joe.  Don’t talk with your mouth full.  You’ll choke again, son.”  Ben waited for his youngest son’s mouth to empty and then continued.  “Yes, Joe.  By the Paiutes.  Unfortunately, there is a factual basis for her concern.  Not all the braves are satisfied with the last agreement brokered between the tribal Chiefs and the Indian agent.  Some miners and homesteaders aren’t helping the situation.  I’ve heard reports from Roy about settlers trespassing on Indian land and even some unscrupulous miners taking young braves by force to use as slave labor on their claims.  ‘Diggers’ they’re calling them.”

 

Sickened, Joe dropped his fork onto his plate.  “Pa…do you think Naavik is all right?  I aint seen him in…”

 

“I don’t know, son. Now is not the time for you to visit Naavik.”  He put his hand on Joe’s shoulder, silencing him.  “I know that White Bear is your friend, that you care for him, but it is not safe for you in the Paiute camps now.  You’ll need to wait awhile for people on both sides to calm down before you try to contact your friend.  I’m sure White Bear—Naavik—is fine.  He has his family to watch out for him.”

 

Pa.  You sound like you’re concerned too.”  Adam studied Ben carefully. 

 

“Not concerned so much as cautious, Adam.  I believe caution is called for right now.  Feelings are running high on both sides, so we’ll humor your Aunt and go to Reno to pick them up.  She seems to feel safer that way, although I see no danger in either arrangement.”

 

Hoss shrugged, and Adam looked nonchalant, but Joe’s countenance brightened considerably.  He relished the thought of a day ride to Reno.  Maybe I’ll have time to look around a little.  I hear tell…

 

“I know that look, young man.  You’ll be with me son.  There won’t be any time to explore.  Now finish your supper.”

 

How does he do that? 

 

Adam and Hoss shared a laugh at the sour expression on Joe’s face.  He glared at them for a minute, and then grinned sheepishly.

 

Pa.  I’m kinda tired.  I think I’ll turn in early.  May I be excused?”

 

Ben eyed his youngest for a moment and then nodded.  “Don’t stay up too late reading, son.” He picked up the telegram again and studied it, frowning.

 

Joe started for the stairs, but then turned back.  “Goodnight Adam, Hoss.”  He hesitated there for a second, focusing on Ben’s scowling face, and then nodded as if he’d made a decision.  Joe quickly walked over to the head of the table, bent down, and hugged his Pa.  “Night, Papa.”  He said softly, and then reddened slightly, his voice softer still.  “I love you.”

 

Ben blinked several times as his arms tightened around Joe’s slim form.  “I..I love you too, son.  Good night and sweet dreams, boy.”

 

Joe kissed his cheek, turned quickly and ran upstairs whistling softly.

 

Ben watched him go, his hand on his face where his son’s lips were a second ago.  He whispered, “It’s been awhile since he’s…I missed that…” He swiped his eyes as he became aware of his older sons’ scrutiny.  “WHAT?  What are you two looking at?  Finish your supper!”  But his gruff words were belied by his bright countenance.  He stood up abruptly.  “Don’t wait up for me, boys.  I need to check the buggy.”

 

As soon as he heard the front door close, Adam kicked Hoss’s chair.   Hoss had still been staring openmouthed in the direction Pa went.  Hoss could count on one hand the number of times he’d seen his Pa cry, and he’d never seen him tear up from…happiness?  Yes.  That’s what they were.  Happy tears.   He slowly turned his gaze back to his plate.  Adam could barely hear him.  “How did…how does he know what Pa needs ta hear, Adam?  How did he know jest what ta say?  Jest what ta do?”

 

Adam answered just as softly, although there was no possibility that either Pa or Joe would hear him.  “I don’t know, Hoss.  It’s always been Joe’s gift—he pays attention to others.  He sees what people need, but now more and more often, I notice that he’s willing to sacrifice to meet that need.  Tonight it was his pride.  He was willing to be embarrassed for a little while to make Pa happy, to lift his worry.  Hoss, I think our little brother is growing up.”

 

************************************************************************

 

You are growing up, aren’t you, little buddy?  But you still look like Ma’s lap baby when you sleep.

 

Adam bent over the foot of Joe’s bed and carefully turned back the covers to look at his leg.  In the lamplight, he could see the three scars.  They only looked like deep scratches now, but he winced at the sight of them just the same.  They brought back memories of the days when each wound was new, days when Doc Martin had cut deeply into that same leg three times to remove infection and dead stinking tissue.  Beneath his hand, the leg was warm, but not inflamed.  Adam nearly groaned in relief.

 

I had to know, brother, but I’m glad you slept through my spying.

 

Joe shifted, and turned onto his side.  Adam heard a soft sound as he tucked Joe back in.  His brother’s book had slid off his chest and onto the floor.  As Adam placed it on the nightstand, he noticed that Joe was using a piece of lacing for a bookmark.  He examined it in the dim light.  Two bear claws were knotted on the strip of deer hide along with a small sliver of shaped and polished obsidian.

 

Oh, buddy!  You are worried.  This is part of Naavik’s totem.  I didn’t know that you two were this close—he wouldn’t give this to you unless you had become like a brother to him…and he to you.

 

Joe sighed in his sleep as if he’d heard Adam’s thoughts.

 

I promise, kid.  I’ll take you to see him just as soon as it’s safe.

 

Adam placed the ‘bookmark’ back where he had found it, in the final chapters of Genesis.  He smiled.

 

Reading about your namesake again, Joseph?  I hope your faith is never tested to the extent that his was.   I hope that I’m never as faithless to you as his brothers were to him. 

 

He smoothed the top coverlet down over Joe’s shoulders.

 

I’d certainly never sell you into slavery little brother.  No matter how much you annoy me.

 

Adam ran his thumb lightly along the sleeping boy’s jaw line and watched Joe’s heavily fringed eyelids flutter and a slight smile grace the young face.

 

I love you, kid.  Sweet dreams.

 

He dimmed the lamp and left soundlessly.

 

************************************************************************

 

By mid-morning the next day, Ben, Adam, and Hoss were hard pressed to hang on to last evening’s warm feelings toward the youngest Cartwright.

 

Adam snorted in exasperation.  Oh, you aren’t being deliberately obstinate, you little mule, you just won’t let go of your idea to check up on Naavik.

 

“But Naavik’s camp is on our way, Pa!  We’ll pass right by it…”  Joe whined for what Hoss and Adam felt was the tenth time too many and at least eight times after they would have received a ‘necessary’ talk at the same age. 

 

Adam and Hoss had been tracking the battle of wills between their father and young brother since Joe had uttered his first “NO” at the tender age of nine months.  By their reckoning, Joe was way ahead in victories in the frequent skirmishes.  Oh, Pa would eventually win the war.  But in the day-to-day battles, Joe usually triumphed.

 

These battles were sieges of words, and Joe usually outtalked his opponent, wearing him down.  But not today.

 

“Joseph Francis Cartwright.”  Pa’s soft and deliberate voice cut Joe off mid-word.  He knew what that tone of voice meant.  Hoss reined in Chubb, wanting to distance himself from this dangerous whisper.  Adam followed his example, wincing.

 

You’re on your own, little buddy.  Both Hoss and I have been signaling you for at least an hour to knock it off and shut up.

 

“Y…yes Pa?”  Joe’s hunched shoulders and white face were too painful to look at, so Adam and Hoss dropped further behind.

 

Pa had stopped the buggy and signaled Joe to dismount.

 

“I think that I need to look at Chubb’s shoe, Pa!” Hoss called out.

 

“…And I’ll help him!”  Adam quickly added.

 

Ben’s raised arm acknowledged them, but his attention and grip were on their young brother.

 

“That stubborn kid.  Aint he never going to learn when to stop pushin’ Pa?”

 

Adam shrugged and then flipped his collar up and turned away as he saw Pa pull his belt loose from his pants.

 

“Oh Punkin’.”  Hoss’s soft heart immediately forgave and forgot Joe’s foolishness as empathy filled his eyes.  They’d all been on the wrong side of Pa’s temper.

 

 

************************************************************************

 

It took a long time to check Chubb’s shoes.

 

When they rejoined Pa and Joe, they noticed that their little brother sat carefully in his saddle again.  He looked resolutely ahead and seemed singularly unrepentant.

 

Adam eyed him, a sour expression on his face.  You’re as stubborn as Pa, Joe.

 

“Oh Pa, Can’t he at least ride in the buggy..?”

 

Ben cut him off.  “I’ve offered, Hoss.  He’s where he’s chosen to be.”

 

“Stubborn little mule.”  Hoss heaved an exasperated sigh, but Adam noticed that he rode as close to Cochise as Joe would allow.

 

For the next two hours, Joe answered direct questions, but was otherwise silent.

 

I hope you’re thinking, little boy.  Pa means to keep you safe regardless of how you buck him.  If he deems it unsafe to approach the Paiutes, then you’re not going there.

 

Joe’s eyes met Adam’s as if he’d read his thoughts.  With a sad smile, he nodded and approached the buggy. 

 

Ben brought the team to a halt and waited.

 

Pa.  I’m sorry I was disrespectful.  Please forgive me for not listening to you.”  Joe had lowered his head when he began speaking, and he finished his sentence by looking up through his lashes to gage his father’s mood.

 

As he watched, Adam’s throat tightened. Oh Lord, Ma looked at Pa just that way when she was unsure of his response.  How did he learn that?  How can Pa stand to see it?  Adam cut his eyes quickly over to Ben’s face in time to see a spasm of pain distort his features, but it swiftly disappeared, and his Pa smiled warmly.

 

“Of course you’re forgiven, son.  You must be saddle sore by now.  Why don’t you ride up here with me?”

 

Joe’s grin lit up his face.  “That cushioned seat will feel good, Pa.  Thanks.”

 

Hoss smiled at Adam as they followed the buggy.

 

“That ‘un goes ta Joe.”

 

“Yep.”

 

Ya hear how he never said…”

 

“Pa was right.  Yep.”

 

“So I reckon Joe won that one..”

 

“Yep.”

 

 

************************************************************************

 

When they arrived in Reno, they found that the stage was running late, so they decided to visit the Diamond Palace Saloon.  Joe did not fuss for a beer, much to Adam and Hoss’s surprise and Ben’s relief.  Joe drank his lemonade in between conversation with the piano player, a young man not much older than Joe himself.

 

Before long, they were both giggling over something, their heads bent together over the piano keys.  Their laughter lightened the faces of the few customers scattered about.

 

Ben motioned the bartender to bring another round.  He set the three foaming glasses down and waved off Ben’s payment.  “That your boy?”

 

“Yes, that’s Joseph.”

 

“He’s a charmer, that one, aint he?  Your beers are on me, Mister.  I aint never heard Neil laugh before, not once in the months he’s worked here.  He’s all alone, ya see.  Folks and young brother died of cholera last year.  Boy’s a good piano player ‘n has a passable voice, but he’s been grieving hard.”

 

“Sounds like he has reason to.”  Adam shook his head, grimacing at the young man’s misfortune.

 

Another distinctive ring of laughter turned all eyes toward the piano again.  In the corner, Joe was telling a story as only he could, with lots of gestures and facial gymnastics.  He had not only Neil’s attention, but also two miners and three saloon ‘ladies’ had gathered around, listening.

 

Hoss grinned.  “He’s sure enjoyinhisself, Pa.  But you expect we oughta go over and protect him from them gals, Adam?”

 

Adam had already stood.  He’d risen to his feet when he’d seen Joe turn the full power of his smile and flashing eyes in the direction of the most attractive and youthful ‘soiled dove’.  She was now hanging onto his arm, and from his vantage, Adam could see one miner’s smile begin to turn downward as he eyed the handsome young boy.

 

“Yes, yes, Hoss.  I think it’s time for us to go anyway.”  Ben laid a tip on the table and thanked the bartender for the drinks.  At his first ‘yes’ Adam and Hoss were already moving quickly across to Joe, and Ben rolled his eyes as he found himself talking to no one.   He sighed and followed at a more leisurely pace.

 

“Come on youngin’.”  Hoss said loudly.  He moved between the miners and his young brother, ‘accidentally’ pushing the frowning man backward.

 

Meanwhile, Adam had circled behind the piano and ‘removed’ the saloon girl with a flash of gold coin, a bottle, and a charming grin of his own.  “Share the bottle with them, love.”  He breathed in her ear as he motioned her in the direction of the retreating miners.  “And hands off the kid.  My little brother is only fourteen.”

 

She smirked at him.  “That old?  Well, it’s about time he learned some of the secrets of lovemaking, then.”

 

Her voice trailed off as Adam pushed her less gently toward the waiting miners.

 

“Not nearly time yet, love.  And not from you.”  He muttered as he watched her settle herself on the nearest miner’s lap.

 

Ben shook his head at his older sons’ actions as he walked over to where Joe was saying his goodbyes.  Joseph had no idea how his brothers watched over him.  Ben touched Joe’s shoulder.

 

“Joseph.  Come on now…”

 

“Yeah, Pa.  Neil.  I hope to see ya again someday.  If you’re ever near Virginia City, come and see me.  I’m sure that Pa will welcome you on the Ponderosa.”  He looked back over his shoulder at Ben for confirmation.

 

“Yes, certainly, Neil.  Any friend of Joe’s is welcome in our home.”

 

Turning back to Neil, Joe continued.  “Write to me, O.K?  I want to know when ya get to New York to meet your girl.  She sounds special.”

 

Neil stood up to shake Joe’s hand.  “Thank ye, Joseph, for the conversation.   I enjoyed speakin’ with ye.”  He stared at the boy, still clasping his hand.  Joe fidgeted a little, and Neil cleared his throat noisily.  “Forgive me woolgathering, Joseph.  Ye have eyes so like me brother Michael’s…” Neil’s eyes filled as Joe pulled him into a rough hug.

 

“Take care ‘o this un, O.K?”  Neil whispered to the startled family behind the boy.  They nodded uncertainly at Neil as Joe let him go and turned to leave, his own eyes over bright.  Adam and Hoss followed closely behind.

 

“I’m sorry for embarrassin’ the lad.”  Neil whispered to Ben.  “Michael was me brother.  He had green eyes and a ready laugh like your Joe.  Your Joseph brings to me mind happier times.”

 

“It’s all right, young man.”  Ben hesitated before following his sons.  “Do write to us, Neil.  I, too, want to know what becomes of you.  And don’t hesitate to come to us if you fall on harder times.”

 

Neil straightened proudly.  “I’ve gathered most of my travel money, sir.  Saved every penny I could.  I’ll get to New York, and to my Molly.  She’ll wait for me.”

 

Ben patted his shoulder.  “I’m sure she will, son.  God speed you on your way.”

 

************************************************************************

 

Adam, Hoss, and Joe were waiting for him on the boardwalk near the hitching post.  In front of them stood the Carter Emporium.  Ben stopped next to them and studied the storefront windows.  As he cleared his throat, the three of them looked his way.  “We still have a little time before the stage arrives.  Let’s get you those fancy boots you’ve been saving for, Joseph.”

 

Ben started for the entrance to the store, but Joe stayed put, digging his toe into the dirt near the trough.

 

“Come on, boy.”

 

“Pa…I don’t want them any more.  I…”

 

“Joseph Cartwright.  Those boots are all you’ve talked about for weeks.  Once you knew your Aunt and Uncle were coming this way, you specifically asked me if you could look for snakeskin boots here.  And now that we’re here, let’s…”

 

“Really, Pa.  These boots are fine.  I’ll wait awhile.”

 

Ben crossed back to his youngest and placed a firm hand on his chin, bringing his face up, so he could look into his eyes.  “What is going on, Joseph?  Did you or did you not bring your wages?   And your birthday money from your brothers?”

 

“I..I brought it, Pa.

 

“Then stop this foolishness and come on.  Your toes must be at the end of this old pair—don’t think that I haven’t seen you limping around...”

 

Joe turned a round-eyed gaze to Adam, who shook his head slightly.

 

“I…I don’t have the money, Pa.  He looked nervously left and right to his brothers.  No help forthcoming there.

 

Adam covered his eyes and Hoss turned to examine the other side of the street.

 

“You don’t have the money.  Is that what you said, boy?”

 

Y..Yes.”


            “Yes, what?  Yes, that’s what you said, or yes you do have the money, which I distinctly remember you just saying that you brought with you?”

 

“Yes to both, Pa.

 

Adam took two steps away as Pa’s voice began to increase in volume.  Hoss adjusted his hat lower down over his eyes.

 

“YES TO BOTH?  What, WHAT does that mean, young man?”

 

Y..Yes I did say both those things, Pa.

 

Joe began to tremble slightly.  He was trying to answer, he really was, but this was not going well.  Not at all.  And his brothers had abandoned him.  If only his father…

 

“Joseph Francis Cartwright!  Have you lost that money?  Is that it?  I knew that I or Adam should have carried it for you.  Well, if you think that I am going…”

 

“PA!  I..I’m trying to tell you what you want to hear…”  His voice trailed off at his father’s expression.  Did he just raise his voice to his Pa?  From the thunderous expression on his father’s face, he suspected that he had done just that.

 

“What I want is for you to remember to speak respectfully, Joseph.  What I want is to hear is the simple truth, boy.” 

 

His Pa’s voice was a whisper now.  Bad sign.  Very, very bad sign.  And now Pa thought that he was lying.

 

“Please, Pa.  Just listen to me…”

 

“I HAVE BEEN LISTENING, JOSEPH!!”

 

Joe stepped back involuntarily.  Back to shouting again.  Worse and worse.

 

“…Pa…I have, had the money.  Yes I do..I did… I mean I…I just spent it, sir.”

 

Where could you have possibly spent that money between Virginia City and here, Joseph?  Of all the cockamamie tales you’ve ever spun…I can’t understand how you expect your brothers and I to swallow this stor..”

 

Joe gulped and pushed out his words in a rush.  “I gave it to Neil, Pa.  I…I probably should have checked with you first, but, but…when he told me about his life, about Molly—you know he’s only seventeen, Pa…I wanted to help him, and when he hugged me goodbye I just slipped it into his pocket…I thought it was what I should do with the money, Pa.  He needed it more than I need a new pair of boots, and I thought that’s what you would do, that’s what Adam would do, that’s what Hoss would do, so I did it, but now you’re angry so I must have done the wrong thing, I guess, but it still feels like the right thing, so I guess I’m not sorry, nope, not sorry at all…sir…” 

 

His voice had petered to a halt, but Adam noticed that his chin was out, trembling slightly, but stuck way out there in that stubborn tilt that was typical of an unrepentant Little Joe.  Adam smiled wryly and winked at Hoss.

 

Joe was grateful when Adam stepped back beside him and slung his arm over his shoulder.  “I guess he’s not sorry, Pa.  Nope.  Not sorry at all.”

 

Ben glared at his eldest.  “I heard him, Adam.”

 

Hoss had sidled back to the other side of his baby brother.  “Yep, pa.  He don’t appear sorry at all, neither.”

 

  Ben rolled his eyes, but then his laughter rang out as he clapped Joe on the back.  “I agree with your brothers, boy.  You don’t look one bit sorry.”  He sobered as his eyes met his youngest son’s.  “I’m the one who’s sorry, Little Joe.  You were right.  It is what we would have done, after all—had we thought of it.  I’m proud that you did, young man.  Very proud.  Now let’s go collect my brother and his family.  I’d like to get back home before nightfall.”

 

 

End of Part One.

 

December 27, 2003

 

Becky Hubler

 

 

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