Disclaimer:  These characters do not belong to me. No copyright infringement is intended.  This story follows “Scarlet Fever”, but you need not read that one to understand this one.  The incident on the cliff had its genesis in a short story printed many years ago in Boy’s Life, the author was listed there as unknown.  I adapted the idea to fit these characters. 

 

 

“The Road Home”

 

            Hoss waved at the departing pair and then turned back to the forge.  Joe sure is fractious lately…kid jest hates to be inside.  I’m glad Pa decided to take him in on his errands today.  Cochise needed the exercise too.  Hoss shivered although the day was warm.  Joe sure scared us with that fever…thought we’d lose him for certain…I know that the doc did too…hardest thing I ever did was to say goodbye to little Joe that day.  Harder on Pa though, rockin’ his baby son and tryin’ to be strong for us.  Thank God short shanks pulled through—doc called it miraculous.

 

            “Getting those nails done?”  Adam smiled when Hoss jumped.

 

            Lordy, big brother!  Yore takin’ sneaky lessons from that other brother of mine.”

 

            Adam laughed lightly.  “Joe claims that’s the only way he can find out what’s going on—and perhaps he’s right.”

 

            Adam reached over and turned the wheel, pumping air into the forge.  When the irons glowed red, he handed them one at a time to Hoss, admiring how his large brother fashioned each nail head with only three hard blows against the anvil.  “Looks like you’re almost done.”

 

            “Yep.  A few more minutes will do ‘er.  You plannin’ on takin’ these to the crew?”  Hoss glanced over and caught Adam’s nod.

 

            “What’s on yore mind, Adam?”

 

            “Nothing, really.”  Adam rolled his eyes when Hoss stopped and stared at him.  “I…I had that dream last night.”

 

            “About Joseph?” I know that much, anyhow.  You’ve never told me exactly what you’re dreaming about…just wakin’ me up with your moaning.

 

            “Yes…”  Adam studied the interior of the barn, avoiding Hoss’s eyes.

 

            “Adam…he’s all right.  He’s right as rain, doc says.  Even Pa’s stopped following the kid around.”  Hoss chuckled.  “Thought that’d drive short shanks plumb out of his head.  Pa’s been practically trodding on his heels, and shouting out for him whenever the kid was out of his sight for even a few minutes…”Hoss set the hammer down and turned Adam to face him.  “Brother…they’re just dreams..”

 

            “I know!  I know…but that knowing doesn’t change how I feel whenever they happen.  Whenever I think about what…”Adam pulled away, but Hoss could feel his muscles tremble a little as he clenched his fists.

 

            “It’s not Joe’s bout with fever that’s botherinya…Yore dreamin’ about Carl, aint ya?”  Adam flinched, and Hoss knew that he’d guessed correctly.  He turned Adam back toward him.  “Tell me.  Talk to me, brother.  I think that’s why yore out here in the first place.”  He caught his breath at the pain in Adam’s eyes.

 

            “Did…did you ever have any problems with any of the hands?  I mean the types of problems Joe had with Carl?”

 

            Naw.  Oh, I had a few call me names over the years, but nobody did nothinta hurt me, deliberate like.  When I think about Carl, I want ta take this hammer an’…”  Adam’s hand closed over Hoss’s tense forearm.

 

            “I do too.  Pa said to let it alone, but my mind doesn’t seem to want to do that.”

 

            “Perhaps ya should talk ta Joe about it.”  Hoss chortled at Adam’s expression.  “He aint bothered none, Adam.  Fact is, he’s sorta proud that he stood Carl down.  Least away, that’s the way he sees it.”

 

            Adam ran his hands through his hair.  “Maybe you’re right, Hoss.”

 

            Hasta be a first time fer everythin’, I imagine.”  This time, Adam joined Hoss in laughter.

 

            “All right, all right.  Message received.  Stop taking the whole thing so seriously.  Carl’s gone, after all, and Joe’s all right.”

 

            “More than all right, brother.  Joseph grew up a little.  It didn’t happen the way it should, and we all feel more than a touch guilty about it, but little Joe learned to handle himself in a mighty tight situation—not that I’m lookin’ for that ta happen ever again, mind you.”

 

            “I’ll take your advice, big brother, and talk to Baby Cartwright at dinner.”

 

            “Just don’t call him that, Adam—or I’ll help Joe find a roll of barbed wire for you.”  Hoss’s laughter rang across the yard at Adam’s pained expression. 

 

 

****

 

          Ben thoroughly enjoyed the ride into town.  He treasured the sight of his youngest.  Joe had been like a small tornado the last few days—storming about the house and yard.  He recognized the restiveness, and offered to treat Joe to a day in town.  The boy had just been feeling closed in, with all of them watching him for any sign of sickness or complications from his bout with scarlet fever.  Ben smiled.  Paul had been right; Joe was completely cured.  Lord, let me never grow complacent again and take for granted any of my sons.  Help me to remember we only have the minute we’re in right now…no guarantee of tomorrow.  Thank you for giving me three healthy sons today.

 

            He urged Buck alongside of Cochise.  “Son, when we get into town, I’ll head over to Franklin’s office.  I’d like you to wait at the mercantile for me.  Let’s see what we can find for Adam’s birthday, shall we?”

 

            Joe grinned over at him and nodded.  “I’ll check everything out for you, Pa.  Kinda see what’s new.”

 

            They looped the horses’ reins over the hitching post outside the store, and Ben nodded a farewell to his youngest as he crossed over to Attorney Price’s office.  He had papers to sign, and he was sure that Frank would want to talk awhile.

 

            Joe meandered around the store, fingering the new books and noting the ones that he thought Adam would like.  He spent a minute next to the buttons and thread, admiring the way Adam’s current romantic interest filled the bodice of her dress.  He sighed.  Adam sure is lucky.  I wonder if any woman will ever kiss me the way she does him…Joe blushed to his hairline when he realized that Katie was staring back at him, her eyes twinkling merrily.  Had she seen where I was looking?  Oh God, don’t let her tell Pa—or worse yet, ADAM.  I’ll be dead before I’m thirteen…

 

            Katie Reid placed her hand on Joe’s forehead.  He stared at her, wide-eyed.  She could feel him trembling.  Oh Katie, you’re just feeling mean today, aren’t you?  Torturing this poor lad…Adam’s right.  Everything he thinks about is in his eyes…

“Joe?  Are you all right?  You look a bit flushed.”

 

            Joe’s color deepened.  “I…I’m fine, ma’am, Miss Kate, I…I was just…”

 

            “I know what you were doing, Joe, and don’t worry…I won’t tell Adam—this time.  But you need to watch where you allow your eyes to roam, or some young lady will take that as an invitation to do some…admiring…of her own.” 

 

            She laughed, and Joe smiled back, confused about her meaning, but cheered that she would be discreet, even when he hadn’t been.  “Thank you kindly for the advice, Miss Katie.  I’ll remember.”

 

            He really is a lovely child.  Almost too beautiful to be a boy.  Those eyes…many a future young woman will get lost in them, I suspect.  Katie Reid patted Joe’s arm and gathered her things.  “Tell Adam that I am looking forward to that buggy ride, little Joe.”

 

            Joe watched her exit, his arm tingling where her hand had rested.  He tried unsuccessfully to keep his eyes above her bustle.  Girls just didn’t used to be this much fuss and bother…maybe it’s something I’ll outgrow.  I’ll have ta ask Pa.

 

****

 

            Ben and Joe shared a delicious lunch with Reverend and Mrs. Evers.  Hiram Evers had a warm place in his heart for the entire Cartwright family, and little Joe was a special favorite of the minister.  He and Joe traded jokes over dessert, while Anna Evers and Ben laughed along. 

 

            “I sometimes think my Hiram is no older than your Joseph.”  Anna confided to Ben in a sotto voice under the high-pitched giggle and deep chuckles coming from the parlor.

 

            Ben nodded his agreement and thanked her again for the lovely afternoon.  “Joseph.  We need to start home if we want to make it before dark.  Hiram—thank you again for the invitation.  We had a wonderful time.”  He shook the minister’s hand and motioned to Joe. 

 

            Joe hugged Mrs. Evers and shook the Reverend’s hand as his Pa expected, but was then pulled into a rough hug, his ribs thoroughly tickled. 

 

The boy’s laughter was muffled against the man’s vest.  “I’ll remember ta tell Hoss the one about the duck…” Ben heard Joseph’s laughter ring out again, and blinked  for a moment, surprised at the sudden surge of emotion that brought moisture to his eyes.

 

            Anna’s expression was tender as she caught his gaze.  “We came so close to never hearing that laugh again, Benjamin.  I’m…thankful, selfishly thankful in Hiram’s case, that God spared your Joseph.  He brings great joy to my husband.”

 

            “Thank you …I…I don’t know what I would do without…” His words were low, his voice choked, but Joe heard him and looked over, concern writ large on his face. 

 

            “Pa?  Are you all right?”  Joe leaned into his Pa’s side.

 

            “Just tired, Joe.  Let’s get on home.  Reverend, we’ll see you Sunday.”

 

            “Yes.  And thank you again, Ben, for allowing us the use of your lovely lake for the baptisms this next month.”

 

            “Anytime, Reverend.  I know that it will be of special significance to Joseph, and I hope to the others as well.”

 

            “Ben.  That reminds me.  I meant to give this to Joseph last Sunday, when he approached me about being baptized.”  Hiram turned and took a Bible off the shelf behind him.  He held it out to Joe.

 

            Joe glanced at his Pa, and at his nod, he took the leather bound scripture.  “Thank you!  Pa!  It’s got my name written in the front!”  The boy held it up, a smile lighting his eyes. 

 

“There’s a note tucked inside as well, Joseph.    I’d like you to read it when you get home.”  The minister winked at the boy.

 

            “Go put it in your saddlebags, son.  I’ll be out shortly.”  Ben waited until Joseph left.  “Hiram.  Thank you.  That was very generous of you.  I put one on order for him today, but I was concerned that it would not get here in time”

 

            “It’s my pleasure…our pleasure.  I have had that one set aside for many years.”  They walked Ben out and stood on their front porch.  Hiram and Anna waved goodbye as the oldest and youngest Cartwright rode out of town.

 

****

 

            “Joseph.  Put that away, please.  If you drop it, you could tear or soil it.” Ben tried to hide his smile at the sight of his son reading while riding.  A familiar sight for him, but it was not usually this son who was in danger of riding into a tree while engrossed in a book.

 

            “Sorry, Pa.  I was just reading one of the scriptures on the letter from…”Joe’s voice stopped abruptly at the familiar rattling sound.

 

            Later, when he tried to remember the exact sequence of events, Ben could never pin down whether he had heard the snake first or saw the look of panic in his son’s eyes.   Cochise and Buck reared at almost the same moment, knocking into each other on the narrow trail. Ben slid off the hindquarters of his mount, made a grab for a small scrub pine on the edge, felt it burn through his fingers, and then slid over the cliff, his hands clutching at the rough rock in front of him as he picked up speed. 

 

            He could hear Joseph’s terrified, “PA!” And then he slammed to a stop, his ankle collapsing sideways on the narrow ledge.  He teetered there, hands scrabbling for any purchase, and found finger holds on the rough granite in front of his nose.  He could feel the ledge giving way, bits crumbling under the toes of his boots.  He looked up into the eyes of his youngest, and knew that he was moments away from falling to his death. 

 

            “Joseph!  The snake!  Watch out..”Ben closed his eyes at the panic in his son’s face.

 

            “It’s dead!  Cooch or Buck stomped it.  Hang on, Pa!  I’ll get my rope.”  Joe disappeared for a moment, and Ben felt a surge of hope.  He’d forgotten that Joe carried that rope with him everywhere—he’d done so ever since Adam had allowed him to join in the round up last year. 

 

            Ben judged that the rope just might reach.  He felt the cuts and scrapes on his arms and face begin to burn and hugged his body closer to the cliff face.  I’ll get out of this… if Joe can get one of the horses to pull… if the rope holds up to the rubbing on the rough granite ledge, if Joe can get it to me…Too many ifs—I don’t want my son to watch me die!

 

            Ben slipped a bit as a large portion of the ledge broke out from under him and fell away.  He could hear Joe yelling, could hear hoof beats receding.  Horses are spooked.  Sounds like one or both ran off.  Joe’s dirty, tearstained face appeared above him.

 

            “Got the rope, Pa, but Cooch ran when I tried to…”Joe gulped, and brushed at his eyes.

 

            “Where’s Buck?”  Ben had laid his right cheek flat against the rock and was tilting his neck backward to see his youngest.

 

            “Ran away…” The despair in Joe’s voice lanced pain through Ben’s heart. “Pa…Pa!!  If I can tie it off, are you strong enough to pull yourself up?”

 

            “I’ll try son.  Throw me the rope, Joseph.”  I’ve got to get him to go for help.  I don’t think that the rope will reach me…I’m too far down, and I can’t see any way to climb higher…

 

            Ben craned his neck, puzzled at the black object above him.  Joe was folding something out.  His Bible!  Smart boy.  He’s running the rope across the binding…should reduce the friction…

 

            “Hang on, Pa!  Almost got it…”Joe grunted as he threaded the rope under one of the exposed upraised roots of a Bristle Cone pine. He brought the rope over and knotted it to itself, making a loop around the root.   The old tree grew out over the narrow road and over the years, repeated heavy rainfall had exposed a few of the larger roots.  Joe had to dig underneath a little to get the rope through.  He yanked hard at his knot, making sure that it would hold his Pa’s weight.

 

            Ben watched the rope lower slowly toward him.  He tried to get a firmer grip on the cliff face, but the cracks were so tiny that only the very tips of his fingers could grip anywhere.  The ledge he rested on gave a little more.  He could hear the bits of granite and shale bouncing and clattering down below.  His ankle burned with a fire all its own, and he desperately wanted to wipe away the sweat trickling into his eyes that was stinging and blurring his vision.

 

            “Pa!  Reach for it.  It’s right above you…Pa!  Do you see it?”  With all of his heart, Joe wanted Adam or Hoss to come galloping up the road.  He had never felt so helpless and afraid. 

 

            It’s too short…Oh Lord!  Too short by two or three feet.  So close!  Ben looked up at his youngest, and Joe began to sob in earnest as he read the truth of his Pa’s predicament in Ben’s eyes. 

 

            He has to leave. I must do what I can to convince him to leave.   I can’t keep my balance here…and even if I manage to hang on, this ledge is giving way.  What will it do to my son if he sees me fall to my death?  Ben took a deep breath.  He was surprised at how calm he sounded.  He was resigned to his fate, but he fought against the thought of his son witnessing his final moments.

 

            “Joseph.  You must run for help, son.  You’re about an hour from the house if you run.  You can be back here with help in a little more than that.  Run and get your brothers.  I need you to…” 

 

            “NO!! NO!  I won’t leave you, Pa! The rope is right there.   It’s just above you.  Just climb a little way and…”Joe reached toward his Pa, trying vainly to shake the rope closer. “I won’t leave you here alone!  I know what you’re trying to do…You’re giving up!  I won’t let you! Try to climb to me, Pa!” Joe sobbed out his last sentence, his hands reaching toward his father.

 

            “Joseph..”  Ben waited until Joe calmed somewhat.  “I can’t, son.  I can’t climb any higher.  There aren’t any handholds, and I think that my ankle is broken.  You must go.  I’ll hang on until…”  Ben was stopped by Joe’s expression.  He’s not listening; he won’t hear me.  He knows that I ‘m just trying to spare him…

 

            “No…wait, Pa.  Just wait!  I’ll get you up.  Hang on a few more minutes!”

 

            “Joseph!  Joe!”  Ben called, but Joe did not reappear.  He could hear faint noises from above, and small cries reached him.  Joseph…so stubborn.  I love you, son.  Ben closed his eyes and gathered his strength to try again to convince his son to leave him.

 

            “Pa!”

 

            Ben looked up, but Joe was not in sight.  However, the rope was snaking down further.  Astonished, Ben loosened one hand and grabbed it, unsure of its solidity until he felt it wrap around his arm as he twisted his wrist.   “Joseph?  How?”

 

            “Pa…grab the rope and try to climb.  Try, Pa!” Joe’s voice reached him, but his son was still not in sight.

 

            Ben fisted his hands, trying to loosen cramped fingers, but keeping a tight grip on the rope and twisting it around his arm   “Joseph!  I’m coming up, son.”  Lord, give me strength to make this climb…and thank you, God, for the stubbornness of my son!  Somehow, he’s given me a chance to live!

 

            Joe gripped his left wrist hard.  He knew that this was going to hurt.   I won’t make a sound.  If Pa knows…Joe’s thoughts swirled away in a haze of pain.  He bit down on his lower lip, tasting blood.  He felt like he was being ripped apart.  The rope jerked tight around his ankle, burning his skin through his pants.  His leg flared with pain, and then went numb.  Oh, God…help my Pa!  Give him strength…Joe felt something give in his shoulder and he tasted blood in his mouth, his scream of agony a strangled moan in his throat.  He squeezed his eyes tight, but still felt wetness on his cheeks.  His left elbow was still firmly around the tree root, but his hands were getting slippery with sweat.  He tightened his grip again and felt the welcome bruising pain in his forearm.  I won’t let go!  Can’t let Pa fall! Got to hang on a little longer…He opened his eyes again, blinking furiously, finally swiping them against his sleeve.  He stared at the spot where the taut rope disappeared over the edge.

 

            Ben climbed the first ten feet hand over hand.  The muscles in his arms and back shook with fatigue.  Arms are giving out on me, but I’m not halfway yet…can’t give way, got to get to the top…get to Joseph…His feet slid and slipped and he cried out when his ankle banged against rock.   Can’t even get a toehold here…Ben hung for a few moments, catching his breath.  The skin on his palms burned and stung.  He was used to a hard day’s work, but this climb was tearing away at his calluses.  He saw the first spots of red as he began to climb again.  Have to finish this before my hands get too slippery to grip. 

 

            Joe saw the blackness begin to creep into the periphery of his vision.  Can’t pass out!  Got to hang on…He was not aware of the whimpers he was making with every exhaled breath.  Pa will be up any minute.  Just have to hang on one more minute, Joe.  He could not stop the guttural moan from escaping when he felt his hip dislocate.  His muscles burned and tore as the ball of his hip left the socket.  He threw his head back, his neck corded with the effort of stopping his cries.  His breath whistled through his nose, his jaw was clenched so tight that the jawbone stood out white against his skin.   He had bitten all the way through his lip and the blood dripped from his chin, staining the rock under him.

 

            Ben was five feet or so from the top when he felt the rope slip a few inches.  He clenched his fists around the fibers, his heart rose in his chest.  Would he fall so close to safety?  NO!  He suddenly felt a flood of energy.  I will not give up.  I will make it!  He pulled himself up a few more inches, then again, and again.  Nearly there…Joseph, I’m nearly up to you.  I’m going to make it!  I will make it!

 

            He felt exhilarated as his bloody hand gripped the rim of rock above him.  He grasped the rope past the open Bible and tugged, throwing his leg over the ledge.  He rolled himself all the way up and over, gasping and panting, trying to even out his breathing.  .  He lay there, looking up at the darkening sky.  Thank you, God! 

 

Unnoticed by the exhausted man, the Bible tumbled downward, pages fluttering, banging into a pile of loose rock and staring a miniature slide

 

            Joe felt the immense pull and tug at his hip and his shoulder.  He was breathing in shuddering gasps, his forehead tight against the rough tree trunk.   He was jerked like a doll to the side and then, suddenly, the rope was loose!  He could not prevent the scream that tore through him at the release of tension.  Pain beyond anything he knew existed burned up his left side.  He lifted his head far enough to see the rope trailing away, and his ears picked up the sound of something falling, rocks sliding.  No Pa!  NO!!!  You can’t fall!  NO!!!  Joe’s head thumped down. The pain in his heart was worse, much worse than the physical pain consuming him.  His eyes rolled back, and he slid into the blackness, his body contracting and relaxing in spasms as his abused muscles tried to recover.

 

            The exhausted man jerked at the shrill scream, but he did not open his eyes.  He was done in, and his body demanded rest.  He slipped further into sleep, moaning a little at the pain in his hands and ankle.

 

            As full dark crept over the face of the mountain, the man and boy lay on the narrow pass less than fifteen feet apart. 

 

****

 

            I really wanted to talk to Joe tonight.  Where are they?  Adam put the andiron down with a clang.  Hoss looked up, sighed, and closed his book. 

 

            “Adam.  I’m sure that Pa jest decided ta spend the night.  They got involved in somethin’ and it got too late ta come on back.”

 

            Adam nodded and rubbed the back of his neck as he stretched his right arm up.  Looks like a big ol’ cat.  He and Joe both do that…wonder if Joe learned it from him or if it’s just one more thing those two do just alike—better not share that thought with Joe…

 

            “I think I’ll take a turn around the yard, Hoss.  Check on the animals”

 

            “Yep.  I’m sure that somethin’s changed in the last hour that needs yore attention, older brother.”  Hoss rolled his eyes and reopened his book.

 

            Adam laughed.  “I know.  I’m being…”

 

            “A worry wart.  Pa’s been takin’ care of hisself a long time.  And he’s more than capable of keepin’ little Joe in line too.  But it’d do my attention on this book good if ya did ‘check the animals’ and stop pacin’ around the settee like one of ‘em

           

            Adam punched Hoss on the shoulder in mock anger.  “Watch it, boy.  You’re not too old to put over my leg...”

 

            Hoss grinned and finished their old joke. “if ya want a broken leg!”

 

            He watched as Adam shrugged on his coat and opened the door.  He had just begun to turn back to his book when he heard Adam yell.

 

****

 

            Buck and Cochise were at the edge of the yard, pacing nervously.  Cochise let out a ringing whinny at Adam’s whistle, but he wouldn’t come any closer.  Jake tried his hand, then Clem, but neither horse would let anyone approach.

 

            “They’re really spooked, Adam.  Looks like you were right ta be nervous, older brother.  I’ll get the wagon ready and have Clem send someone for the doc—just in case.”

 

            Adam motioned to him to hurry up, but he didn’t turn around.  He approached the frightened horses cautiously, talking in a soft voice.  Buck’s trailing rein was easy to snag, but Cochise kept backing away.  Finally, Adam was able to get within petting distance when he began to sing softly.  Cooch stopped and pricked his ears forward.  Ha!  Calms Joe down, Stands to reason it would work for his horse, too.

 

            It took only moments for he and Jake to check the lathered horses.  They weren’t hurt, just scared and exhausted.  Jake volunteered to put them away, and Adam handed him the reins. 

 

            Hoss had the wagon ready, and Hop Sing had settled himself in the back on a pile of blankets.   He crossed his arms at Adam’s raised eyebrows.  “I go with you.”

 

            Adam shrugged.  “There may be no need.  We’ll probably find them walking the road, complaining about their sore feet.” 

 

            “I go with.” 

 

            Adam sighed and took the lantern from Hoss.

 

            Hop Sing always gets the last word, ifn’ he wants it.  Always been that way, long as I can remember…”Come on, Adam.  You light the way first, then I’ll spell ya.”

 

****

 

            They made good time.  The moon came out and lit up the landscape in a checkerboard of whites, grays, and blacks.  The lanterns only became necessary when the wagon was moving under the trees or when the mountainside loomed above, throwing the road into darkness.  Most of the time, all three of them rode, occasionally calling out for their missing family members.

 

            “We could miss them completely if they’re off the road.  If they…can’t answer us.”  Adam never stopped sweeping his eyes along his side of the road as he whispered his fears aloud.

 

            “Or we could come across them right smack dab in the middle of the road, waitin’ for us ta pick ‘em up.   Don’t borrow trouble, brother.  My heart can’t take it.”

 

            Adam nodded.  “Sorry, Hoss.  You’re right.  I can hear Pa now.  ‘Don’t worry about tomorrow.  Each day has enough trouble of its own.’”

 

            “Wise words…hard ta practice sometimes, though…Adam!  Pull up!”  Hoss jumped off his side of the buckboard and steadied the lead horse.  He pointed ahead about twenty feet to a narrow point of the mountain road.  “Looks like rope…don’t it?  See…right there, curled across the road.”

 

            Hoss didn’t wait for a response, just started forward at a trot. 

 

            Adam set the brake and started after him, breaking into a run when he heard Hoss cry.  “PA!”

 

            He slid to his knees beside his brother.  “Bring a lantern! Hop Sin.. thanks, Hop Sing.”  Adam set light beside Ben’s head and watched Hoss check Ben’s arms and legs.  “His head is bleeding some.  Did you..?”

 

            “I seen it.  Looks like scrapes more th’n anythin’ else.’ 

 

            Ben’s head moved when Hoss touched his ankle.  This’ns broke.  Don’t feel any other breaks on his arms or legs, though.  Check his chest, brother. If’n its all right, lets ease him away from this edge.  He’s right on the lip of this cliff, and it’s a long fall to the bottom”

 

            “Pa!  Pa, can you open your eyes?”  Adam’s voice was low and urgent as his long fingers probed Ben’s ribcage.  Ben lay unmoving again.  “Nothing broken here that I can feel.  He’s not reacting to anything…”

 

            The two brothers unfolded one of the blankets and pulled their father onto it, further away from the sheer drop.

 

            “Where lil’ Joe?  Mister Cartwright need to wake up.  I don’t see number three son.”  Hop Sing covered Ben’s prone body with another blanket.

 

            Anxiety over their Pa temporarily eased, Adam and Hoss looked around.  Adam spotted the dead rattler.  “I think I know why the horses were so terrified…”

 

            “JOSEPH!”  Hoss bellowed close to Adam’s ear, and he nearly fell over with the shock of it.

           

“Hoss!  WARN me next time.  You’ll have me laying out on the ground next to Pa!  Hop Sing, get the extra lante…Oh, you already did.  Hoss, you take this light and look ahead on the road.  See if you can spot his tracks.  I’ll look around here.  Hop Sing, why don’t you gather up this rope?”

 

            “I stay here, watch Mr. Ben.” The cook sat and glared at Adam, daring him with his eyes to say anything to the contrary.

 

            “Like I said, Hop Sing, you stay here.”  Adam rolled his eyes, thankful it was his father who usually dealt with the obstinate Cantonese man.  I admit, I wanted to be the one to stay near Pa…just to make sure he’s really all right, but you win as usual, Hop Sing.  Now, little brother, where did you go?  You both got thrown, and there’s this rope here…Adam froze, his eyes squeezed tight against the hideous thought.  OH God… Please no…Please Joe, don’t have fallen…

 

            Adam walked to the cliff edge and looked down.  He could see about half of the face, its moonlit gray granite folded into shadow where the cliff was cracked and weathered.  Please, God.  Don’t let my little brother be down there.  He was powerless to stop his imagination from creating the scene.  Pa and Joe riding along, Joe probably talking nonstop and Pa nodding and smiling.  The rattler; the horses rearing; throwing their riders--Joe…going over?  Pa, near the edge, trying to catch him?  Trying to throw him the rope? Adam shuddered.

 

            Why wasn’t the rope here then, near the edge of the cliff?  Why is it out across the road?  He picked up the end near his Pa and absently began coiling it, his hands making neat loops while his mind worked busily.  Where are you, little boy?

 

            He stopped about halfway across the road, and watched Hoss’s lantern.  He was coming back…Maybe he found something?  Adam yanked at the rope.  It’s hung up on…His legs were moving before his mind really registered what he had heard. 

 

            “HOSS!! Bring the light!  Hurry!  Over here!”  The high-pitched moaning filled his head.  He wanted to clap his hands over his ears.  Oh, Joe!

 

            The approaching circle of light revealed more than Adam ever wanted to see of human pain and suffering.  One glance at Hoss’s horrified eyes revealed that he, too, knew in an instant what Joe had done for their Pa.

 

            Adam’s knife shook until Hoss covered his hand with his own strong warm one.  “Cut his leg loose first, Adam.  His ankle’s real cold.”

 

            His brother’s steady voice calmed him somewhat.  “I…I can’t get under the rope, Hoss.  It’s cut into his leg.”

 

            “Cut through the knot.  That’ll loosen it.”  Hop Sing was suddenly there beside them, a lantern held high, blankets over his arm.

 

            “Hold it up here, Hop Sing, can’t see his arm real well…Oh Lordy, punkin…what did ya do?”  Hoss’s voice was a sorrowful sigh.

           

“Save honorable father.”  Hop Sing had tears running off his chin, but his voice was firm.  “He save his father life.  Make rope long enough, you see?  Rope not long enough to reach.”

 

            “Yeah…”Hoss ran his fingers down Joe’s cheek.  The boy was quiet again.  “I’m gonna have ta cut through this root…either that, or break his fingers.  He’s not lettin’ go.”  Oh Joseph, punkin…you dug down and forced your arm under that old root, crooked your elbow round it, then clamped down on that wrist with your other hand—ya made a loop with yore own arm, baby…”Adam, this shoulder is dislocated.”

 

            “His hip is too—God, Hoss, how could he stand it?”  Adam laid his hand on Joe’s chest, wanting to feel him breathe.  The rise and fall of his chest under my hand makes looking at him easier, somehow.  Adam watched as Hoss carefully cut through the root, and then he maneuvered Joe’s arm loose when Hoss lifted the severed root away.  Joe’s right hand was still clamped tight on his left arm.  Both Adam and Hoss tried unsuccessfully to pry the boy’s fingers loose.  Joe’s face stayed serene through it all.

 

****

 

            Adam and Hop Sing rode in the back of the wagon and tried to cushion the bumps for Ben and Joe.  Neither showed any signs of waking. Paul arrived at the ranch around sunrise, quickly checked Ben over, and then went straight to work on Joe.

 

            Joe had not stirred.  Adam knew, because he had watched each breath that the boy took.  Am I afraid that you’ll stop breathing if I don’t watch you?  Yes…I’m scared.  We could lose you still; you were so cold when we found you.  Joe, you’ve got to get all the way well, boy.  It will kill Pa if you don’t recover from this, just like it would kill me if you made the same choice for me.  We’re supposed to protect you, little brother—not be the cause for hurt…Oh, baby—I’m so proud of you…what you did to help Pa…so proud.  Now wake up, brother…so I can tell you so...

 

            Paul watched Adam tuck the blankets further up on Joe’s chest.  He had set the boy’s shoulder and hip, both were uncomplicated dislocations, but the child’s lack of response worried him.  He should have come up from the bed screaming when the bones popped back into place.  He didn’t even flinch.  And the bruising on his arm.  He clutched his own arm hard enough to break the ulna.  Paul shuddered as he relived breaking the first three fingers of Joe’s right hand.  It was the only way to get the boy to let go of his own arm.  Joe’s left arm was strapped to his chest, and Hoss had cut and fashioned two boards to keep Joe’s hip from moving.  It was just a matter of time before the limbs healed.

 

            Paul set his suture tray on the table.  He pulled up a chair and began to close the boy’s chewed lip.  Adam hovered nearby.  He had sent Hoss to watch Ben, but seemed unable to leave his youngest brother.

 

 “Sit down, Adam, before you fall down or knock something over.  I don’t think Joseph will move, but be ready to hold him down if he reacts to my needlework.”  Need to give Adam something constructive to do.  He’s more upset than I’ve ever seen—can’t say as I blame him.  I’ve never had to break a boy’s fingers before, just to make him let go…never seen a child chew through his own lip, just to keep silent…

 

            Paul sighed wearily as he tied off the last stitch.  He stood, twisting a little to stretch his back and looked down at the youngest Cartwright.  Joseph’s face had been washed clean of blood and sweat, but this only accentuated the swelling around his mouth and the paleness of his skin.  Doctor Martin leaned down and placed his hand on the boy’s chest to check his breathing.  Too shallow and rapid.

 

            “Well, young man.  It’s time for you to wake up a little and fuss at us.  Never thought I’d see the day that you would sleep through my stitching.”  Paul studied the boy’s face for any sign of awareness.  He shook his head and for the third time felt around the boy’s skull and down his neck for any lumps or wounds.  Nothing.

 

            “Doctor…will he be all right?  I mean, when will he wake up?” 

 

            Paul’s sharp ears picked up the slight tremor in the young man’s voice. I wish I could tell you what you want to hear.   “I…don’t know, Adam.  I fully expected him to scream the house down when I corrected the dislocations.  That’s a very painful procedure.  His…withdrawal…concerns me.  But we need to give him time.  He’s had a very hard day.”  Paul smiled sadly at his vast understatement.  “ Perhaps his mind is giving his body time to recover a little before he deals head on with the pain…I’m just speaking suppositions, though.  I don’t know why he isn’t more aware.  I can find no medical reason for him to still be unconscious.”

 

            He reached over to clasp Adam’s shoulder.  “You should rest while he is.  I know that you probably won’t leave, but at least close your eyes awhile.  Joseph is in no immediate danger. Your father will need you too.  And, speaking of Ben, I need to work on his ankle.”

 

            Paul stopped in the doorway, watching Adam cradle Joe’s splinted fingers in his hands.  Lord, help this family.   Joseph, if you don’t recover, I believe that Ben will be destroyed…

 

****

 

            “How do you feel, my friend?”  Paul had finished wrapping Ben’s ankle, and now was picking bits of rope fiber out of the man’s palms.  Hoss held his Pa’s wrists, one at a time, to keep him from jerking away at the tweezers invasion of his tender flesh.

 

            Ben, with the aid of some laudanum, watched the whole procedure through bleary eyes.  He nodded shortly at Paul when the man finished tying off the second bandage, and sighed heavily.  He was still so tired.

           

“Where’s…” Ben cleared his throat, and his voice gained some strength.  “Where’s Joseph?  And where is Adam?” 

 

            Paul answered him smoothly.  “Your youngest and oldest are sleeping right now, I hope.  Everyone has had a very disrupted and exciting night.”  Paul held up his hand to stop any more questions  “And that’s what you must do as well.  Go to sleep, Ben, so that your middle son can rest too.”

 

            Ben nodded and closed his eyes.  In a few minutes, he was deeply asleep.

           

            Hoss watched as Paul began to wipe down his instruments.  “Doc, is Pa…”

 

            “Your father will be just fine.  He’s too old to climb hand over hand up a cliff, and his body’s making him pay for that, but he’ll recover quickly with rest.  Keep his hands clean until those wounds close, and keep him off that ankle.  Keeping him in bed will keep him out of Joe’s room.”

 

            Hoss ran his hand down his face and his large shoulders slumped as he rested his head on his fist.  Paul had never seen him look so weary.  “I meant what I said to your Pa.  You need to sleep, too.”

 

            “Is Adam sleeping?  And how is Joe?  You must have given him a whopping dose of medicine ‘cause I didn’t hear a peep from him.  You did set…”

 

            Hoss’s voice died away at Paul’s slow headshake.  “I didn’t have to drug him.  He hasn’t moved since you brought him home, Hoss.  I sincerely hope that he comes out of this soon, because I don’t know how your father will cope with what Joseph did to save him, much less if that has caused the boy lasting damage.  I don’t understand why he hasn’t awakened…”

 

            Hoss grabbed his arm when he turned away.  “Joe…he’ll be fine though.  You said everythin’ looked simple enough…I…I…Oh Lordy, I just keep seein’ him at that first moment, his head thrown back…”  Hoss’s eyes were bright with unshed tears.  “…he was hurtin’ so bad…and he did it to hisself, doc!”

 

            Paul gripped his arm.  “Yes.  And he did it to save Ben.  And he did it willingly, with his whole heart.  Would any of you have done different?”

 

            Hoss looked away.  “…he’s my baby brother, Doc.  If I had been there…”

 

            “If you had been there, you might be dead!  You don’t know, and it’s fruitless, a waste of time, to even consider anything other than what did happen.  Because of Joe, your Pa is alive!  And because of you and Adam, Joe and your father made it home alive!  Move forward from those miraculous facts, boy, and help your family recover.”  Paul shook the big man’s arm a little, and Hoss stared up at him, his face a mask of surprise.

 

            “I…I never thought of it quite that way.”  Hoss smiled a little. “You givin’ Adam these kind of encouragin’ talks too, doc?”

 

            Paul smiled back.  “Your older brother takes on more guilt than the average ten men, Hoss.  I don’t know exactly what’s eating at him about all of this, but I think that his only cure will be Joe waking up and the two of them talking it out.  I don’t think any other person’s words will work.”  Paul’s face grew grim.  “And I pray that brotherly conversation happens before your Pa wakes up to the facts of Joe’s injuries.”

 

            Hoss nodded.  Please, Lord…Joe’s home now; bring him all the way home…

           

 

****

 

            NO!  Pa!  You can’t fall!! No…no…Joe’s left arm twitched, his fingers curling inward next to his collarbone.  His right hand tried to clench into a fist, to hang on, as he relived the last moments before his Pa’s fall. 

 

            Adam caught his splinted hand and tried to smooth out the fingers as he watched his brother’s face twist in pain.

 

            “Hoss!  Go get Paul…”Adam heard his large brother’s rapid footsteps, but his eyes never left Joseph’s face.  “Little brother, come on Joe.  Wake up for me.  I’m right here; Hoss is here too, boy.  Open your eyes, Joe.  It’s time to wake up.”

 

            Paul leaned over his shoulder.  “How long has he been like this?”

 

            “Just started.  It’s like a nightmare, but he won’t wake up.”  Adam’s hands continued to run lightly over his young brother’s injured hand, and slowly, the fingers relaxed.

 

            “Well, hello.  It’s about time we saw those green eyes again, young Joseph.”  Paul’s voice was jubilant.  After two days of no response whatsoever, he was delighted to see the half open eyelids.  The boy was becoming severely dehydrated.  They hadn’t been able to get him to swallow much of anything.

 

“We need to get you to drink some water, young man.  I think that will make you feel much better.” Joe blinked slowly, staring dully at the three shadows over his bed.  He felt himself being lifted, felt something cold and wet against his stitched lip.  He winced and turned his face away as the water spilled down his front.  He began to shiver.

 

“Hoss, hand me that towel.  Now, young man, let’s try that again.  Joe, you need to drink this.”  Paul nodded at Adam, who held his brother’s chin firmly.

 

            Where?  Where am I?  I hurt…everywhere.  I need Pa…He opened his mouth to call for his Pa, but then memory washed over him like a wave and his face crumpled.  He began to sob, his shoulders shaking with the force of his tears. 

 

            Hoss had to turn away at the pain in his baby brother’s eyes.  “Paul…do somethin’ for him.  He’s hurtinsomethin’ fierce.” 

 

            Paul brought the cup to the boy’s mouth.  “Joseph, open.  This will help you feel better.  It will take some of the pain away.”  This time, with Adam’s help, most of the liquid went where it was supposed to go.  As soon as Adam released his chin, Joe turned his face away, twisting sideways to escape his brother’s arms.  Hoss can’t stand to look at me!  They must hate me!  I…I hate myself!  I killed Pa!  I wasn’t strong enough, and he fell!  Oh Pa!  Why didn’t I die with you?  I want to die, too!  The medicine began to work, and Joe gradually stopped struggling.

 

            Adam gathered him close, crooning to him, stroking back the hair that stuck to the sweaty forehead.  Hoss sat, stunned at the violence of Joe’s awakening.

 

            Paul stepped back and stared at the boy.  Both brothers looked up at his whispered words.  “What’s going on in that head of yours, Joseph?  This is about more than pain from injury…I wish I could see into your mind, boy.”

 

            “Paul…I think he’s feverish.”  Adam’s deeply shadowed eyes reflected his fear.  “I don’t know how to help him…I thought his waking up would be the start of his recovery.  I never thought that he’d fight me like he just did…Is he aware enough to know that we’re trying to help him?  Does…does he blame us for not being there to help him with Pa?”

 

            “I…don’t know, Adam.  It seems like he’s been fighting hard not to get better…I don’t know why would he do that, though.”

 

****

 

            “I’ve been put off long enough, Adam.  You look awful…you look like you haven’t slept in days.  Paul won’t tell me a thing, except that Joseph is running a fever, and he doesn’t want me to catch what he has.  But I’ve had enough!  I want to see Joseph NOW.  I need to see for myself that he’s all right.”  Ben glared up at his eldest son.  “If you don’t take me to his room this instant, Adam, I’ll…Ill…”

 

            “You’ll what?  Fall out of bed and break something else?”

 

            “Paul!  I demand to know what’s going on with Joseph!  I haven’t seen him since he threw me the rope, and I need to…”Ben’s face was red with frustration.   He was not used to being trapped in his bed, unable to do for himself, and he was furious and afraid at the stonewalling he was getting from Paul and his older sons.

 

            Paul sat on his bed.  “Ben…Joe will be fine, but we want to make sure that you recover quickly as well.  I don’t want you exposed to whatev…”He was silenced by the look of absolute fury in his friend’s eyes.

 

            Ben’s voice hissed out, quiet and so cold.  “Paul, you are one of my best friends, but our relationship ends, now, this minute, if you do not either let me up from this bed or bring Joseph to me.  I will make my own judgments about what is good for my health.  You will not keep me from seeing my son.”

 

            Paul blinked.  He’d heard the stories about Ben’s temper; everyone had.  I had no idea, friend.  He swallowed and cleared his throat.  “We need to talk, Ben.”

 

            Ben looked from his two sons back to the doctor, horror in his eyes.   “Please….don’t tell me that Joseph is…” 

 

            “NO!  No, Pa…no.  Joe is real sick, but he’s alive.  Don’t fret yourself, please!  Me and Adam found ya just as we told ya, four nights ago up on the summit.”

 

            Ben looked away, his voice soft.  “I remember…pieces of the accident.  The fall and the end of the climb, especially.  I was sure that the rope wouldn’t reach me, and it didn’t, at first.  I tried to send Joe for help—didn’t want him there in case…well, you know.  But your stubborn brother wouldn’t leave, said he had another idea.  Sure enough, he lengthened the rope.  By the time I was close to the top, I hurt everywhere.  Then, the rope slipped a bit and I was sure…” Ben caught the knowing look between Adam and Paul.  “What?”

 

            “Ben..”

 

            “Pa…No Paul, I should tell him.”

 

            SOMEone tell me! Or I will, by God, get up and…”

 

            “Pa…Joe lengthened the rope.”

 

            “I know that!  Will you…”

 

            Pa.  I’ll tell you everything if you just…listen quietly to the end.  Please.”

 

            As furious as Ben was, he tried to let his anger go in the face of Adam’s naked pleading.  “It’s going to be hard for you to hear, Pa, probably harder than it was for Hoss and I to see, so I only want to tell it once, and hopefully, Joe will be able to talk about it with you soon.  Maybe that will help him, too.”

 

            At Ben’s nod, Adam began.  He talked quietly, speaking through his own and his Pa’s tears, until finally, Ben knew everything.

 

            “…and so Pa, I don’t know what to do for him.  He doesn’t look at me or Hoss.  He won’t eat or drink unless we force him to.  We can only touch him without him flinching in his sleep.  I…I think he blames us for not being there…for being forced to do what he did.”

 

            Ben wiped his face again.  “Take me to him, Adam, Hoss.  I need to be with Joseph.  I need to talk to my boy.”

 

           

****

           

            Pa…I hear you…Joe smiled, his dry lips cracking around the black stitches.  Pa…I want to see you—want to be with you.  Want to be away from here and the pain I’ve caused my brothers…God…I need a miracle, I need to be with my Pa.

 

            Ben tried to speak gently, tried to hide the pain he felt in his heart from bleeding out into his voice.  His boy, laid out here, so damaged.  My son did this to himself to save me!  Lord, how do I show him how much I love him?  How do I bring him back to me?  How can I look into his eyes and know that I caused all this pain, all these bruises and broken bones…yet he’s smiling!?

 

            “..pa”

 

            Ben closed his eyes, fighting tears. He swiped at his face and looked again at his youngest son.   “Joseph, open your eyes, boy.  I’m sitting right here by you, son.  Please, boy. I need to talk to you…your brothers and I need to hear you laugh again…”

 

            Ben placed his hand, feather-light, on Joe’s cheek.  “Please, son.  Just open your eyes…”

 

            Joe’s lashes fluttered, and slowly, his eyelids opened.  Thank you, God!  I can still hear him!   He blinked his eyes, then brought up a shaky hand to rub away the blurring moisture. The room was full of gray shapes. 

 

            “That’s it son.  I’m right here, and I’m not going anywhere until we can talk.”

 

            “Pa?”  Joe closed his eyes tightly, but the tears slipped between his lashes.  He felt the memory of the loved hand wipe them away; he felt his father’s love like a soft breeze gently brushing over his cheeks.  God!  Thank you for this last chance…help me now!  I can feel Pa near me.  Help me to say what I need to say, so maybe he’ll forgive me for being so weak.  Joe kept his eyes shut and spoke to his father’s spirit  “Papa?  I…I’m sorry…I…I should have been stronger.  I let you fall and I…I’m so sorry!” 

 

            Joe cried harder as he was pulled up and into a warm embrace.  He was fully awake now, and he’d had his prayer answered.  Even if only in a dream, he had talked to his Pa, and had made his peace.  Joe could feel the shuddering sobs wrack the body of the man holding him.  Feel the steady beat of the strong heart thudding against his own.  He brought his free arm up and around the broad shoulder and buried his face in the soft shirt.   “Adam?  You forgive me?  I didn’t mean it!  I tried…”Joe gulped, choking a little on his tears.  “Adam?”

 

            “Open your eyes, little buddy.”  Adam did not bother to wipe away his own tears; he wouldn’t rob his brother of this moment, to see how much he loved him; how much he had missed him.  How much they had all missed him.

 

            Joe raised his head and looked over the shoulder of the one who held him—and into the eyes of his big brother.  “Adam?’  Joe’s puzzled eyes widened in wondrous recognition as he felt the strong arms encircling him hug him closer still, rocking him, stroking his hair. “Pa?  PA! Oh Pa!”

 

            The End

            Becky H

            4/26/04

 

 

Epilogue--two months later

 

“…and I baptize you in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost.”  Reverend Evers lifted the boy up out of the water and smiled down at him.

 

“Welcome to your new life, Joseph.”

 

 

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