" REMEMBERING THIS YEAR "

 By:  Lynne G.

 

 

All was quiet inside the large cozy ranch house of the Cartwright family.  Ben Cartwright was the only member of the family who hadn't gone to bed for the night.  As he sat in his chair near the large stone fireplace watching the flames, he thought back to everything that had to him and his family that year, which would end in two more days, and he hoped and prayed that the new year would be much happier than the present year had been.

 

The year had started out happy with his precious family greeting in the new year together, well that was everyone except the baby of the family, four year old Little Joe, as everyone called him because he was so small for his age.  The little boy was sleeping as the new year arrived.

 

Ben thought back to the moment the Grandfather clock struck midnight, when he gave his beautiful wife, Marie, a big kiss and hug and they wished each other ' HAPPY NEW YEAR.'  If only he could hold her now.

 

Ben's two older sons, sixteen year old Adam and ten year old Hoss stayed up to also greet the new year with their father and stepmother.  The older boys didn't usually stay up that late at night, but New Years Eve was special. 

 

Ben remembered how bad the winter had been that year, and he thought it would never end.  He had to laugh when he remembered watching Marie, Adam, Hoss and Little Joe playing in the snow, and making snow angels.  Marie loved the snow so much and she acted like a child when it snowed.  It was hard to get her to come indoors to get warmed up after playing in the snow. 

 

As winter finally turned into spring,and there was mud everywhere from the melting snow.  Ben laughed out loud when he remembered seeing his baby son, Little Joe covered from head to toe in mud, and the shocked look on Marie's face at the sight of her mud covered baby boy.  Ben could figure out why the four year old boy loved to play in the mud so much.  It was almost impossible to keep that little boy clean.  Seemed like Hop Sing and Marie had to wash muddy clothes everyday.

 

As Ben continued to stare into the flames in the fireplace, and thinking back, it dawned on him, that one day Little Joe had a plan that would keep his clothes from getting muddy.  The little boy decided to take his clothes, socks and boots off and go play in the mud totally naked.  " We all had to laugh at that little imp when we saw him rolling in the mud totally naked and giggling loudly.  It took lots of hot water to get that child clean again.  Yes, spring was a happy time for all of us." Ben thought.

 

" Summer, Ben sighed as he thought back to summer, as it was suppose to be time for family picnics, swimming, fishing, plus it was also a very busy time for major repairs that would be needed on the Ponderosa.  Sure enough, summer was busy with repairs, but thankfully hardly any damage occured during the hard winter.  That meant more time to spend with Marie and the boys.  We were so happy then, and Little Joe sure kept all of us on our toes, that's for sure.  Where does that little boy get all that energy ?"

 

" Thursday, that day I will never forget.  The day all our lives changed forever.  OH GOD WHY ??  That day started like any other day.  Adam and Hoss went off to school, and before I headed out the door to work, I remember laughing at Little Joe.  That little boy had more of his breakfast all over him, rather than in him.  He was so happy and giggling.  He didn't care if he was covered in food.  That look on Marie's face as she looked at our food covered baby boy will stay with me forever."

 

" When I came home for lunch that day, I found Marie chasing a naked and giggling Little Joe all over the yard.  I sat there on my horse watching them, and I couldn't help it, but I had to laugh.  Marie stopped running and she glared at me, and told me it wasn't that funny !  Little Joe was yelling, " NO BAF " over and over.  I got down from Dusty and went after our little imp.  He looked up at me when I finally caught up with him, and he said, " Hi ya Papa."  It took both Marie and I to give that little boy his bath.  I just can't figure out why he hates to have a bath, when he loves to play in water.  Oh well !"

 

"As the day went on, Adam and Hoss arrived home from school.  I spent the afternonn at my desk doing paperwork.  It's not my favorite thing to do, but it has to be done.  Marie spent the afternoon running after Little Joe, who seemed to be into all kinds of mischief that afternoon.  That boy !"

 

" We finally got him down for his nap, for which we were all grateful for.  Ah, peace and quiet at last.  Marie said she needed to get away for an hour or so and go for a nice quiet ride on her horse."  We kissed and said we loved each other."

 

" Around four in the afternoon I heard her racing into the yard on her horse.  I wish she would slow down when she entered the yard.  Suddenly I heard her scream, then a loud thud.  I jumped up from my desk and ran to the door, with Adam right behind me.  We told Hop Sing to keep Hoss inside.  Thank goodness Little Joe was still sleeping."

 

" I will never forget seeing Marie laying on the ground not moving.  Her neck was at an odd angle.  He horse was standing on three legs, with the fourth leg broken, looking terrified.  I fell to the ground next to my beloved Marie, and I knew she was gone.  Time seemed to stand still.  Marie, my love, please come back to me.  I need you so much."

 

" I remember Adam talking to me, but I don't remember anything he said to me.  I carried Marie in the house and laid her on the sattee, and I kneeled down next to her and I cried."

 

" I thought I was dreaming and I kept trying to wake up, but I couldn't.  The days just seemed to melt into each other.  I didn't care.  All I wanted was my Marie back.  I couldn't even look at Little Joe, since he looked just like Marie.  It just hurt too much to see him. Thinking back to that time now, I wasn't a very good father to my boys, who needed me so much.  Adam seemed to take over and he was both father and mother for Hoss and Little Joe.  Thank goodness for Hop Sing as well.  I don't know what I would have done without Adam and Hop Sing."

 

" It took me a good two months to get back to reality again.  I am so thankful for Little Joe now because everytime I look at him, I see Marie in him.  That makes that little boy even more special to me, and I thank Marie everyday for giving me that precious little boy."

 

" On October 31, Little Joe turned five years old.  It was just family for his little birthday party.  Where does the time go?  Seems like only yesterday he was a tiny baby.  Adam is now seventeen and Hoss is eleven.  That just can't be !"

 

" Adam told me one day that he would forget about going to college, but I told him that Marie wanted him to go, since that had been his dream since he was a small boy, and I wanted him to go too.  He said he would wait till that next year to go.  He knew we needed help here.  That was so thoughtful of him."

 

" Things were pretty much back to normal around Thanksgiving, even though I missed Marie so much, and I was feeling good with life again."

 

" I can't believe how big Hoss is getting.  He is the size of a full grown man, even though he is only eleven years old.  He has a heart of gold, and he is so much like his mother, Inger.  What a wonderful woman she was.  Hoss can easily do the work of a man, and he has been such a big help around here.  He loves his little brother so much, and he is so gentle with him as well."

 

" Little Joe tries so hard to convince me that he is a big boy now, and that he can do big boy things, but he is only a little boy of five.  He is a good little boy, even though mischief just seems to follow him where ever he goes.  It is so hard not to laugh at him when he tries to act grown up, and when he tries to be very serious.  His sweet little face has mischief written all over it.  I don't know how he does it, but he can talk Hoss into anything, which usually ends up in total mischief.  Those two boys !"

 

" It's almost impossible to get angry with Little Joe.  The way he looks at you with those huge green puppy dog eyes, that wonderful smile of his, and that special giggle of his, makes you just want to hold him and kiss him.  Even when he is covered in dirt or mud, he can look so innocent.  He truely is the ' heart of the Ponderosa' ."

 

" I was a little worried about Christmas this year, our first one without Marie.  I wasn't sure how Little Joe would be without his momma, but Christmas went well.  We have a beautiful large Christmas tree this year.  It was fun going out to look for the tree this year.  Little Joe was so excited, that it was hard to keep him from fall out of the sleigh as we went to find our tree.  Every tree he saw, he said it was perfect.  We would have ended up with a livingroom full of trees if that little boy could have had his way.  We finally did find the 'perfect' looking tree after all."

 

" We all had a good time decorating the tree that evening.  I held up Little Joe so he could put the angel on the top of the tree.  He really enjoyed doing that.  You should have seen all the excitement on his little face.  It was just priceless.  When we finished with the tree, we had some wonderful freshly baked Christmas cookie that Hop Sing had just made, and hot chocolate to go with the cookies."

 

" Hop Sing made a true feast for our Christmas dinner, and we all ate too much.  Even Little Joe had seconds.  He sure loves turkey.  We have lots of turkey left, and we all love turkey sandwiches and turkey soup.  Yes, it was a wonderful Christmas.  I know Marie was keeping watch over us, especially Little Joe.  It was wonderful to see all the excitement of Christmas written all over that sweet face of his."

 

" Today we had a fun day playing in the snow.  We had several snowball fights, and we made lots of snow angels too.  Yup, even I made a snow angel.  Little Joe kept laughing at me while I was making my snow angel.  He said I looked funny making snow angels.  I felt silly making one, but you know what, it was fun !"

 

" Our snowmen still look good.  It was fun making them too.  We made Cartwright snowmen, a Papa snowman, and his three son snowboys.  We even made a Hop Sing snowman, which Hop Sing helped us make.  He really enjoyed making a Hop Sing snowman."

 

" We have done a lot of sledding too.  You should hear Little Joe giggling all the way down the hill.  He is so funny with that giggle of his."

 

 "It is very hard to get that little boy to come in the house when he's playing in the snow.  He doesn't care if he's wet and freezing cold.  Usually one of us ends up having to carry him into the house, while he is yelling and kicking.  It takes the three of us to get that little imp out of his wet clothes and into dry ones.  We put all of our mittens, scarfs, boots and Little Joe's wet clothes in front of the fire to dry."

 

" Once we get him into dry clothes, I love to wrap him up in a warm quilt and hold him.  Hop Sing always has lots of hot chocolate made up to warm us up, and it tastes perfect after a cold day of playing in the snow.  I love times like this and I wish we could stay like this forever, with all of the laughing and love that we all feel."

 

" So, as I sit here and remember this year with love, laughter, and sadness, I thank God for my precious wonderful sons, Hop Sing, and the Ponderosa.  I hope and pray that the new year will bring love, laughter and good times to all the ones I love the most in my life.  THANK YOU GOD !"

 

                                  " THE END "

 

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

 

 

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