The Identity Crisis By Mary Stone

CHAPTER 1

Hoss Cartwright sat atop a pickle barrel, outside the local store waiting for his younger brother to finish settling up their tab. He was observing the daily activity of the town when he heard the unmistakable sound of the approaching stagecoach.

The stage pulled up and stopped right across from him. He watched as the passengers emerged one by one. Hoss enjoyed studying the people and imagining where they'd come from and where they were headed. Hoss himself had spent most of his life in Nevada territory and loved hearing about other places.

As Hoss watched, a young woman stepped off the stage and left Hoss staring. She was beautiful and he swallowed hard at the sight of her. She had long flowing blonde hair and long legs that moved elegantly, and left him breathless. She was deep in conversation with two other women, who appeared to be pointing
out the business' in town to her.

Hoss was startled out of his concentration when a hand slapped him in the chest.

" Dadburnit Little Joe, don't do that. You dang near scared me to death " he admonished his brother

" Well that's it, let's go" Joe said impatiently " What the heck were you staring at anyway?" he asked looking in the direction Hoss had been looking. The girl and her companions were gone.

" You just never mind little brother, it ain't none of your business. Come on let's see if Pa's ready to go yet"

The two brothers walked to the Post Office in search of their father. Hoss found himself looking around for a glimpse of the mystery woman.

" Here he comes" Joe said as he spotted his father walking towards them.

Ben Cartwright was sifting through his mail as he walked. He stopped in front of his sons, still looking through the bundle.

" Anything from Adam?" Joe asked, referring to his oldest brother

" No nothing" Ben answered, checking again to be sure

" You don't reckon he ran into some trouble do you?" Hoss asked. Adam had gone to Placerville to visit some friends and there was no way to tell when he'd be back. Ben was hoping for a telegram to relieve his worry over his son. But he didn't want his other two sons to know. Adam would be back soon he assured
himself.

" I'm sure he 'd wire us if there was a problem. Your brother knows how to take care of himself" Ben said attempting to mask his own concern " Did you boys settle up with Mr. Cass?" Ben said as he resumed his stroll to the horses

" Yeah Pa, all taken care of" Joe stated

Hoss was glancing all around again when he saw the woman walking on the other side of the street. He was so intent on keeping his eye on her, he didn't realize his father and brother had stopped walking. He walked right into Joe's back and sent him sprawling to the ground.

" Hey watch where you're going" Joe shouted picking himself up and brushing the dirt from his pants.

Hoss was utterly embarrassed " Sorry Little Joe, I reckon I wasn't paying attention, I didn't mean it" Hoss apologized

Ben was frowning at them as Joe threw his brother a disgusted look

" What the devil were you woolgathering about now son?" Ben asked

Hoss turned red, he couldn't tell them, they would never understand. His father would simply shake his head and Joe would laugh at him. If it were either one of his brothers they would simply introduce themselves and let things fall into place. But Hoss was different and he knew it, he didn't have the good looks and confidence his brothers had with women. He felt clumsy and awkward because of his size. At six foot four and more than two hundred and fifty pounds, most people did find him intimidating on sight. But Hoss thought his looks were equally intimidating and most of the time he avoided female encounters because of it.

When he was younger he would often wish he had the same physical attributes that his brothers possesed. But with maturity he'd learned to accept himself the way he was. And now he dreamed that someday a woman would come along who could look past the physical part of him.

What Hoss lacked in physical aspects, he more than made up for in other ways. He was a man who had learned from experience to take people as they were, he was never judgmental. He was gentle and patient to a fault, with animals as well as people.

He was a man who revered what he considered gifts of God, and had little use for material things. Hoss was liked by all who took the time to know him and he had faith that someday a woman would come along who would see these things that outweighed what he considered his inadequacies.

" It wasn't nothing Pa, nothing at all" Hoss said and brushed past his father.

Ben and Joe looked at each, Joe shrugged and moved on. Hoss was about to get on his horse when he saw the same woman walking toward the International Hotel.

" Pa, I'm gonna stay in town awhile" he announced as his father joined them

" Just make sure you're back in time for supper Hoss" Ben said as he placed the mail in his saddlebags

" Pa you gotta be kidding, look who you're reminding to come home for supper" Joe said with a short laugh

Hoss made a face at him and decided to ignore him

" Yes sir Pa, I'll get back in time. Just a little something I wanna tend to here first" Hoss promised

Ben nodded and got on his horse

" What about me Pa, I ........" Joe began but Ben pulled him up short

" Not on your life Joseph, you've got chores backed up from yesterday, so you just get yourself home"

Joe mumbled something under his breath and vaulted onto his horse. He sat and waited for his father to join him.

" I'll expect you at supper then Son" Ben said as he climbed on his horse

" Yes Sir I'll be there. You tell ole Hop Sing to make extra cause I'm gonna be powerful hungry when I get home tonight " Hoss added

Joe rolled his eyes and reined his horse toward home without bothering to wait for his father.

Ben studied his middle son momentarily, curious about what he was up to. Deciding to leave well enough alone he waved at him and turned his horse away.

" See ya Pa" Hoss called as he watched his father lope away.

Now he was free to find this mystery woman and her to discover her reason for being in town. As he crossed the street he vaguely wondered if he'd have the guts to talk to her when the time came.

CHAPTER 2

Hoss was on his way to the hotel when he was stopped by one of the townspeople.

" Howdy Hoss, what brings you to town?" he asked as he leaned on the post in front of the saloon

" Oh hi Charlie, just business is all, how are you?" Hoss said trying to be polite but impatient to move on

" Hoss are you figuring on entering the arm wrestling contest again this year?" Charlie asked " Cause I done lost money on you last year you know?"

" What? Aw come on Charlie, that feller didn't look near as strong as he was. I was hornswoggled like everyone else" Hoss said remembering the little man fondly. That day he reflected, the best man had won.

While they were talking they were joined by another local who joined in their conversation. After talking for several minutes Charlie said " Hey fellas why don't we continue this conversation inside and have ourselves a drink?"

" Now that's an idea that sure appeals to me, how about it Hoss?" the other man said

" Oh no thank you Rocky, you fellers go on, I got some things to do. Maybe I'll catch up with you later on" Hoss said apologetically

The two men were no sooner out of sight when Hoss heard someone calling his name.

" Oh Mr. Cartwright, Mr. Cartwright!"

Hoss turned and did a double take when he realized it was the mystery woman herself. She was rushing toward him and Hoss felt a sudden sense of panic.
What did she want and why was she looking for him? How did she know his name, and what on earth would he say to her?

She stopped before him out of breath and paused to pull herself together

" Forgive me" she gasped " But it's imperative that I speak with you. You see I was hoping to secure the teaching position that was available but your Mr. Stewart informed me that they've narrowed down their choices already and are waiting for your vote. I was hoping that we might discuss my qualifications for the job and that you might persuade the others to take me into consideration also before you make your decision"

She was talking so rapidly that Hoss couldn't respond. Once he recovered from the surprise he realized that she had mistaken him for his father or brother, both of who were on the school board and would have been involved in the decision to hire her.

She did not miss the confusion on his face though " Oh I'm sorry I was told that you were on the school board, you're name isn't Cartwright?"

" Oh yes Ma'am it is ,but you see...."

" Oh thank goodness, do you think perhaps I could meet with you and your father? I really feel I could do this job and since I'm going to be living in Virginia City, this would be a perfect opportunity..."

" Ma'am you don't understand, see.........." he was about to tell her that she had him confused with his brother Adam. But he stopped himself, so what if he wasn't on the school board, his father was. He was sure he could talk his father into meeting with her. And he knew if anyone could sway the rest of members of the board, his father could. And besides there was no telling when Adam would get back and the sooner they made a decision the better. He made up his mind to then and there without giving it any further thought.

" Ma'am I can't promise you anything but I will speak to my father about it and see if we can't arrange some kind of meeting to talk about it" Hoss promised not even sure how he would manage it " By the way I don't mean to be pushy Ma'am but could you tell me your name?"

She giggled with embarrassment " Oh I'm terribly sorry, It's Amelia Gardner, how do you do?" she said and held her hand out to him

Hoss took it hesitantly in his own and looked in awe at how tiny it was in comparison to his own. He looked down at her face, more beautiful close up than he could have imagined and caught his breath

" Ma'am is there any chance that I could maybe buy you some dinner?" Hoss asked and then braced himself for the rejection

" Why that would be delightful and also give us a chance to talk" she said and happily looped her arm through his.

Hoss smiled with pleasure at her and proceeded to escort her down the street. As they were walking they were approached by the town Sheriff, Roy Coffee.

" Howdy Hoss, how's that fine family of yours?" he asked as stopped to chat

" Fine Roy, just fine, I'll tell them you asked after em"

" Well now you do that Hoss, take care now" Roy answered and continued on his way

Hoss was about to move on but the young lady stood still, a puzzled expression on her face

" Anything wrong Miss Amelia?" Hoss asked her

" The Sheriff, he just called you Hoss. I thought your name was Adam"

Hoss balked and swallowed hard, now what? He couldn't tell her he'd misled her, not now, what would she think of him then?

" Oh that, it's a nickname Ma'am, no one ever calls me by my given name. Well no one but my Pa when he's upset with me" Hoss said and swallowed the huge lump in his throat, it was a somewhat truthful statement.

" Oh I see, do you like it?" Amelia asked him her smile having returned

" I don't rightly know, I mean I don't think I ever thought about it much. It's just what folks have always called me" Hoss explained

" Well, a fine name it is then" Amelia declared and walked on Hoss silently let his breath out with relief. He realized for rthe first time, that he may not get away with this farce as easily as he'd first thought.

He could only hope no one in town would blow the whistle. But what about his own family? Suddenly the thought of Little Joe caused him to grown out loud without even realizing it. Amelia stopped again to look up at him with concern

" Are you alright Mr. Cartwright?" she asked

" Oh yes Ma'am, I uh, I got new boots on and they ain't quite broken in yet is all"

" Oh I'm sorry, well let's see if we can't find us a comfortable place to sit down and relax then" she offered

Hoss followed along as she continued to hold his arm and he sent a silent wish to his older brother " Adam please stay away long enough for me to straighten out this mess" he thought, and felt just a little sick to his stomach.

CHAPTER 3

Ben sat at his desk going over the monthly bookkeeping and missing his eldest son more than ever. Adam, bless his heart, loved doing this daily task that Ben found to be a necessary chore. And like everything else he did, Adam made sure his records were meticulous, he was a perfectionist and always had been. Ben wondered how that had developed in his oldest son. Although he'd always told his sons he expected them to do their best, he'd never told them he expected perfection.

The sound of the front door opening broke into his deep thoughts. He recognized Hoss' heavy bootsteps coming toward the desk.

" Hi Pa, where's Little Joe at?" he asked sitting easily in the chair across from his father.

" He's out with the haying crew, he should be back by supper" Ben answered without taking his eyes off the figures before him.

" You want me to ride out and give them a hand?" Hoss asked him

Ben lifted his head to look at Hoss briefly " No that's alright, I'm sure he's got more than enough help" he said

" Oh, I reckon I'll hang around here till supper then " Hoss remarked drawing his father's attention again.

" Something on your mind Son?" his father asked leaning back and putting the pen down so as not to appear distracted

Hoss looked into his father's face and swallowed hard

" Well Sir, as a matter of fact there is something I need to talk to you about if you a minute"

Ben noted the hesitation in his voice " Alright, I'm listening"

" Well Sir, I met a young lady in town. She just moved here I reckon, and she needs a job. Her name is Miss Amelia Gardner and she was hoping to become the new schoolteacher and......"

Ben's mouth formed into an amused smile " Hoss what's that got to do with you?"

" Well Pa, see I figured since you're on the school board and you might be able to arrange a meeting with other fellers from the school board for her so they might consider her for the job"

" Well Hoss it isn't that easy Son, she has to have credentials and a teaching certificate. Although we haven't made a final decision yet, we've merely narrowed down our candidates. I'm sure we could talk to this young lady assuming she has all the necessary paperwork and is indeed qualified for the position"

" Oh yes Sir, I'm sure she does, I mean she is. If it's alright with you, I'd like to ride in tomorrow and give her the news"

" Oh of course it's fine with me, I have to admit you've peaked my curiosity. I'll talk with Bill and the others and see when we can all get together. Maybe by then Adam will be back and we can make a decision and have our teacher in place"

Ben didn't see Hoss wince at the sound of Adam's name.

" Thanks Pa, I appreciate your help, she'll be real happy about this"

Ben leaned back in his chair and smiled " You know Hoss I wouldn't mind meeting this young lady before we get together for the meeting" he commented watching Hoss' reaction

" What d'ya mean Pa?" Hoss said with confusion

" Well what I mean is, if you'd like to have her out for dinner some time, that would be fine with me too"

Hoss blushed visibly " Why would I wanna do that Pa?"

" Well Son, the way you talked I thought you had feelings for this girl"

" Aw Pa, don't be silly, I just wanna help the young lady out is all"

" Oh" Ben said nodding " I see, nothing special about this one"

" No Sir, I didn't say that as a matter of fact she's right pretty. I just ain't interested that's all"

Hoss was trying to cover up, he knew this was the last place he could invite her to for the moment.

But Ben was not fooled by his words at all, the expression on Hoss' face told him everything. Nonetheless Ben decided not to bother him about it and cause him any further embarrassment. He turned his attention back to his work.

" Hey Pa, you reckon Adam'll be home soon?"

Ben answered without looking up again

" I don't know Son, he said he may stay as long as a month"

Hoss frowned thoughtfully " He's been gone more'n two weeks now, ain't he?"

" Yes I believe so " Ben said, then looked up again " Why do you ask?"

" No reason really, I just miss him I reckon" Hoss said folding and unfolding his hands

Ben assumed a doubtful look but giving it some thought, decided Hoss was probably sincere

" Well frankly Son, so do I, but he'll be back soon I'm sure"

They both turned toward the window when they heard horses riding up to the house. Ben stood to look out the window

" Is it Little Joe and the men?" Hoss asked him

" Yep, it sure is" Ben said turning to meet Joe at the door, Hoss fell in behind him.

They heard the door open and slam shut, and Joe looked at them as they approached

" Well how'd you make out today Son?" Ben asked clapping him on the shoulder

" We got it all baled" Joe said taking off his work gloves " If the weather holds out we can get it into storage within the next couple days"

" Good that's what I like to hear. Hop Sing has supper almost ready, why don't you go get washed up" Ben said

Joe wiped dust and hay from his shoulders and pants " Right Pa" he said as he headed for the kitchen. As he passed Hoss he grinned and remarked " Hi stranger, you're name is Hoss right?"

Joe meant it as a reference to his absence on the ranch, but Hoss caught his breath. Did Joe know his secret? Was he going to blow the whistle to the mystery lady? He would have to have a talk with him before he got the chance to get to town again.

CHAPTER 4

Joe was in his room, lying on his bed propped up by pillows. He had his legs bent with a book open on his lap. He was reading to try and wind down before retiring for the night, when he heard a knock on his door.

" Come on in" he called

He looked up as Hoss entered the room " Hey Brother, what's up?" Joe asked brightly closing his book with his finger holding the page he'd been reading.

Hoss wasn't quite sure how to broach the subject, but he had to let Joe in on it. If he didn't he knew he'd pay dearly later on.

" Well actually there was something I need to talk to you about"

Joe swung his legs over the edge of the bed and looked at Hoss with interest. He could sense that this was going to be good. Hoss was nervously fingering the quilt on his brother's bed growing very uncomfortable.

" Well what is it?" Joe said impatiently

" Hoss' expression quickly changed to one of serious business.

" Look here Little Joe, what I got to say is between me and you and if a word of it leaves this room, I guarantee ya, I'll jerk you bald headed, you got that?"

Joe seemed unfazed by Hoss' words, his face was lit up with excitement " Wow, this must be good, alright you have my word" joe promised raising his right hand for emphasis

Hoss wasn't convinced though " I mean it Little Joe, I'll break you apart" he warned again, wanting to be absolutely sure before he disclosed his secret

" Geez, I promised what more do you want blood?" Joe complained

Hoss glowered at his young brother " Now that ain't a bad idea" he declared

" Oh come on Hoss, tell me what's going on already" Joe demanded starting to rise with a hint of anger in his voice

Hoss put a restraining hand on his shoulder " Alright sit down and I'll tell you. But I don't want you forgetting what I said, you hear?"

Joe frowned " I said I heard you, now out with it"

Hoss sat down next to his brother and looked right at him

" Alright here it is, you gotta pretend I'm Adam"

Joe stared at him for a moment " What, what for?"

" Just never mind why, that ain't necessary for you to know"

"Well in that case forget it" Joe stated and propped himself against his pillows again, folding his arms across his chest. It was an old ploy he'd used since childhood on both brothers and it always worked. This time was no exception.

" Hoss was growing irritated " Alright already I'll tell ya, why do you have to be so dadburn stubborn?"

Joe smiled sweetly " It's a little trait I learned from Adam, or should I say you" he said laughing

" You better quit it Joe, I done told you it ain't no joke"

Joe did his best to adopt a serious expression but it wasn't easy.

" The truth is there's a little gal in town, her name is Miss Amelia. She wants to be the new schoolmarm. I reckon someone in town told her that Pa and Adam were on the school board, and then she must'a had me pointed out to her or something. Well somehow she got the idea that I was Adam and that I could help her get
the job"

" Well why didn't you tell her you wasn't?" Joe asked simply

Hoss shook his head " I don't know....... I meant to dadburnit but she was so sure of herself and of me. I just got to thinking that maybe I could help her after all, same as Adam would've. Sides he ain't around anyway and if......."

" Mmmmm hmmmm, and what do you plan to tell Adam when he gets back?" Joe asked cutting him off, convinced his brother had finally lost his mind.

" Well if you do like I say, I won't have to tell him nothing" Joe frowned doubtfully " And how you gonna explain the folks in town calling you Hoss?"

" I already took care of that little brother, I told her it's a nickname folks have always called me" Hoss said with an air of triumph

" Oh come on Hoss, someone in town is going to spill the beans sooner or later" Joe insisted

" No they ain't, don't worry about that, all you gotta do is keep quiet. And if Adam gets back I'll talk to him myself" Joe was staring at him with a look of skepticism

" And I'll tell Miss Amelia the truth as soon as I figure out hhow to explain it to her, so don't be frettin' about it"

" Oh I ain't frettin' about that, I was thinking of someone else" Joe said

Hoss looked puzzled " Who?" he asked

" Pa, what are you gonna tell him?"

" Oh yeah" Hoss said sighing heavily

" He's not going to be happy if he finds out what you're up to" Joe reminded him

" Well he don't have to find out if you keep quiet and let me handle it" Hoss told him

" Oh don't worry, I have no intention of getting involved in this one, you can count on that" Joe promised " You're on your own"

" Good that's just the way I want it and you mind what I told ya" Hoss said standing to leave " I'm going down to get a snack. I'll see you in the morning, goodnight"

Joe waited until he was nearly out the door then called "

Goodnight Adam"

Hoss looked around the door to glare at him " You better watch if Little Joe" he warned again. Joe was looking at his book and smirking which did little to ease Hoss' mind.


CHAPTER 5

Hoss rode alongside the Ponderosa herd as he and the ranch crew moved them to lower ground for the winter months ahead. His younger brother was riding on the other side of the herd and Hoss preferred it that way. Ever since he'd disclosed his secret, Little Joe had become unmerciful with his teasing. As is reading
his mind, Joe chose that moment to wave to Hoss.

"Dadburn your ornery hide little brother" Hoss mumbled without bothering to wave back. Little Joe had his brother on pins and needles and was enjoying every minute of it. Just that morning

Hoss found one of Adam's books on his dresser, he didn't have to ask how it got there. Hoss' attention was drawn to an approaching rider that turned
out to be his father.

" Howdy Pa" Hoss called " Anything wrong?"

Ben trotted up alongside his son and pulled his horse to a walk. " No not at all Son. How's it going?" Ben asked as he took in the sea of cattle moving quietly along.

" Just fine Pa, we had to flush em out of hiding places, but we're well on our way now"

Ben nodded " Good, listen I had some news for you. I talked to Bill Stewart today, and he agreed to talk to the others and arrange a meeting with your Miss Amelia" he said pleased to be able to deliver the message.

" Wow, that's great Pa, thanks" Hoss said happily, keeping his eye on his little brother.

" Anyway Bill's gonna let me know later today when the meeting will be" Ben went on " I'm supposed to meet him for dinner in town tonight. Then you can let her know when you go to town for supplies and the mail tomorrow"

" Uh Pa, that reminds me, there ain't no cause for Little Joe to come along with me tomorrow. I can take care of things just fine on my own"

Ben looked at his son curiously " Oh come on Hoss, you really think your younger brother is going to pass up a chance to go to town?"

Hoss frowned unhappily " No Sir, I don't reckon he would"

" What's up with you two anyway?" Ben asked him watching his expression

Hoss turned to his father " Nothin' why?" he said defensively

" Hoss, I think I know when Joe's antagonizing you"

Hoss raised his hand and waved it at his father " Don't worry about it Pa, it's nothing serious" Hoss said confidently

Ben smiled " How many times have I heard that before" he commented

Hoss smiled too " Pa, don't you worry, I can handle Little Joe"

Ben looked back to the herd leaning forward a little, the saddle leather creaking with his movement.

" Well Adam should be home soon, maybe that'll alleviate some of the pressure" he said

" You didn't get a telegram or something did ya?" Hoss said turning so suddenly that Ben jumped

" No, I didn't and what's this all about?"

Hoss quickly feigned innocence " What d'ya mean Pa?"

" I mean what's with the intense interest in Adam's return?"

Thankfully at that moment Joe came galloping up to join them.

" Hi Pa, what's up?" he called

" That's what I was wondering myself" Ben remarked eyeing them both. Hoss gave Joe a challenging stare which did not go unnoticed by their father.

" I don't suppose you two would care to fill me in here?" he said

" Hey did I hear someone mention Adam coming home?" Joe asked distracting his father momentarily.

" For the tenth time, no I haven't heard anything yet. What's with all the concern for Adam now?" Ben demanded to know

" Geez Pa, can't a fella miss his brother without folks getting all suspicious. He has been gone quite a spell ya know" Joe said with a wounded expression

Ben was suddenly tired of the cat and mouse game. He decided to give Adam's room the once over when he got home. There was no telling what these two were up to.

" Anyway Pa " Joe said breaking into his thoughts " Sometimes it's as if Adam's right here with us" he said and giving Hoss a deviant smile turned and galloped off again.

" Hoss....." Ben started, but changed his mind " Never mind, I don't want to know" he said

" Look here Pa, you just let me know when them fellers wanna have that meeting so I can tell Amelia"

Ben was trying to figure things out when Hoss said

" Pa I forgot, I need one more tiny little favor"

Ben was regarding him with an intense stare " Well, I'm listening"

" I sure would appreciate it if you didn't mention Adam's name at that meeting"

" Now what kind've nonsense is that? What the devil does Adam have to do with this meeting? Now look Hoss, I don't know what you boys are up to but if I find out........"

Hoss cut him off by grabbing his arm " Pa trust me the less you know the better off you're gonna be. I'll see you at dinner" he said quickly and rode off to the front of the herd

" Now just a minute Hoss........ I'm still talking to you young man " Ben hollered, but realizing the futility of it, he angrily reined his horse toward home. This was one he was almost sure he didn't want to get involved in.

Hoss slammed the door as further warning and walked down the hall and descended the stairs. Ben was still working at his desk and didn't look up as Hoss went into the kitchen

After helping himself to some of Hop Sing's donuts, he walked back toward the dining room to find Joe coming down the stairs with Adam's guitar in his hand. Hoss instinctivley knew he was up to no good.

" Joseph what are you doing with your brother's guitar?" Ben asked looking up from his work. Curious as to why Joe would risk messing with something as sacred as Adam's guitar.

" Oh I was just having trouble sleeping and was wondering if my big brother here would sing me a song. Sometimes it helps you know"

" Wait'll I get my hands on you" Hoss suddenly snarled, throwing the donuts to the floor.

Joe was already sprinting up the stairs laughing hysterically as Hoss came bounding after him

Ben listened to the slamming of Joe's bedroom door and then Hoss shouting " Little Joe, I'm gonna tear you limb from limb, you open this door"

Ben frowned and shouted at the ceiling " Boys you make sure you put that guitar back exactly where you found it" he warned

Soon he heard Hoss angrily stomp off to his room. He wasn't sure what the outburst had been about but he smiled at their antics. Sometimes it seemed they'd never grown up.


CHAPTER 6

Joe walked through the front door of the ranch house after finishing up the evening chores. It had been one of those long days that left him tired and achy all over. He'd intended to go right up to bed, but one look at his brother Hoss on the sofa changed his mind.

He deliberately walked toward him clapping and rubbing his hands together.

" So brother Hoss, Pa should be home anytime now with the big news about the infamous meeting"

Hoss looked up " So what about it?"

" Well, how you gonna get yourself invited?" Joe asked him seriously

" What ?" Hoss asked confused

" The meeting dummy, you are supposed to be on the school board remember? Don't you think she'll get suspicious if you ain't there?" he said and waited for it to sink in

" Dadburnit, I hadn't thought of that, but how in the heck am I gonna get myself into that meeting? Them fellers aren't gonna just let me in without a reason" he said worriedly

Joe sat down across from his brother and tried to look real thoughtful " Yeah and Pa would sure wanna know what you were doing there that's for sure" he said'

" What am I gonna do?" Hoss cried

Joe said back cupping his chin with his hand " I'd say you have a big problem on your hand big brother" he said sadly shaking his head

" Don't get smart with me Little Joe" Hoss snapped

The room grew quiet as Hoss pondered a way out of his predicament. Joe was watching him with an amused smile on his face.

" I don't suppose you'd be interested in helping me out with some ideas here?" Hoss said impatiently

" Oh I am Hoss, I'm giving this a lot of thought"

" Yeah I'll bet you are" Hoss retorted

Both boys turned as the door opened and their father entered He took off his hat and gunbelt and regarded his sons with interest " What are you two up to?" he asked them

" Nothing Pa, how 'bout you?" Joe said cheerfully

" Well in case you're interested Hoss, the meeting is set for nine o'clock Saturday morning" Ben said as he strolled into the living room. He pulled his pipe and a tobacco pipe and went about filling it.

" Nine huh, that's kind'a early ain't it?" Hoss asked looking up at his father

" For who?" Ben wanted to know as he lit his pipe and sat down to relax

" Well Pa I was thinking maybe I might attend that meeting with ya, maybe I could fill in for Adam" Hoss suggested

" What on earth for? Besides the truth is we don't need a proxy for Adam to make the decision, we can go ahead and vote without him in this case"

" Oh" Hoss said sighing deeply

" By the way, when you boys go into town tomorrow be sure and pick up the mail, maybe we'll have some word from Adam about when he's coming home" Ben added

" It'd be just my luck" Hoss grumbled under his breath

" What's that Hoss?" Ben asked

Hoss was saved by Hop Sing entering the room with a platter containing fresh pies

" Mr. Cartlight I make pie, rhubarb and apple, you come sit, eat" he called to the family

" Hot dog, you don't have to ask me twice" Hoss declared as he jumped up and went to the table

" There's a surprise" Joe quipped as he joined him

" Save me some Hop Sing" Ben called " I'm still kind've full from dinner in town"

" Why you no have dinner at home Mr. Cartlight, you no like Hop Sing's cooking?" the celestial cook asked

" Now Hop Sing you better than that" Ben admonished him " I love your cooking. I had dinner in town with Bill to save you the extra work that's all" he insisted

Hop Sing left the room leaving a trail of Chinese grumblings in his wake. Ben shook his head and moved to his study.

" You want apple or rhubarb?" Hoss asked his brother as he cut into the warm pies. He looked up to see Joe studying him closely. " What's a matter?"

" Well I just don't remember you liking rhubarb" Joe said squinting at his brother

" What are you talking about I love......... Dadburnit Little Joe don't start with me, now what d'ya want?"

Joe laughed and pointed to the apple pie. Hos glanced anxiously toward his father who was now sitting at his desk and thankfully out of earshot.

" And if you go to town with me and we happen to run into Miss Amelia, you mind your manners" Hoss whispered savagely

" Hoss, now you know that I'm nothing less than a gentleman with the ladies" Joe said sweetly. Hoss glared at him as he handed him his slice of pie. " Here eat this and keep quiet" he said. Joe sat down to eat still smiling. Hoss helped himself to a piece and sat across from him.

" Hey Hoss, you mind if I get the mail tomorrow, that way you can have some privacy when you give your lady friend the good news" Joe asked between bites of pie

" Why you being so generous all of a sudden?" Hoss asked him

Joe's smile turned to an insulted frown " There now you see, I try to be nice and you don't even appreciate it, thanks a lot"

" I'm sorry Little Joe" Hoss apologized feeling just a little guilty " But you ain't exactly been the most fun to be around lately

" Oh well excuse me all to pieces, maybe you'd prefer Adam's company about now?" Joe snipped pretending to be hurt

Hoss chewed on his pie and groaned inwardly. It wasn't that he didn't miss his older brother, but he sure hoped he'd stay away just a little bit longer. He still hadn't figured out what he was going to tell Adam. He suddenly felt so bad he almost lost his appetite. He looked up when Joe pushed his plate back

" That was delicious, it sure hit the spot" Joe declared rubbing his stomach with satisfaction " Hey big brother, I'm gonna head on up to bed, you got anything I could read?"

" You better get while you can still walk" Hoss warned Joe just laughed at him as he walked to the stairs

" Goodnight Pa" he called as he headed up to his room

" Goodnight Son, pleasant dreams" Ben answered as he had for more years than he could count.

Hoss still sat at the table trying to come up with a way to sort his problems out. He had to come up with a good excuse for not being at the meeting. And then what if someone mentioned Adam's name in his absence, what would he do then? Hoss felt truly sick to his stomach as he pushed the half eaten pie away.


CHAPTER 7

Hoss sat undetected outside the window of the local schoolhouse, eavesdropping on the meeting between Amelia and the schoolboard members. He'd told Amelia that he couldn't attend the meeting because the others would consider his vote and input biased and she seemed to accept that explanation without question. He could hear just about everything being said and felt as if he'd been holding his breath since his arrival. He was definitely getting a headache from lack of oxygen. But he
forced himself to stay and listen as his father spoke up again " Well Miss Gardner I must say we find your credentials quite impressive, and we're very sure you're more than qualified for this position. As you know we'll need some more time to come to a final decision. If you wouldn't mind waiting and if it's alright with the others, perhaps we can come to a decision this afternoon."

The rest of the board members nodded their consent. Amelia smiled her gratitude " I would appreciate a decision as soon as possible, I can be reached at the International Hotel, room 16" she offered.

" Alright Miss Gardner, we'll be in contact with you within the next few hours" Bill Stewart stated

Amelia stood up " Thank you for your time and consideration gentlemen" she said as she collected her things and left the room.

Hoss met her at the front of the building and was disappointed at her appearance.

" Well how'd it go?" he asked her, hoping he was reading her expression wrong

" I'm not sure Hoss, they're going to make a definite decision sometime today. I only thing to do now is wait, and I hate waiting."

Hoss smiled his understanding and took her arm. " Here Miss Amelia, set down here and we can talk a little to pass the time" he offered

Amelia sat down grateful for the company, and tried to think positive. " I think your father definitely liked me " she said hopefully

" Well Ma'am I don't reckon there's anyone he don't like and that's a fact. Especially when it's a gal like you" Hoss said blushing profusely

" Oh Hoss you are the sweetest man I've ever known" Amelia said covering his hand with her own. It seemed to Hoss that the warmth of her hand moved up his arm and spread throughout his body. He was almost sorry when she moved it away

" To tell you the truth I was a little afraid of him at first. He's a big man which I guess is where you get your size from, but it wasn't just that. I think it was those eyes, so dark and piercing, nothing like yours. Where'd you get those wonderful blue ones from?" Amelia commented causing Hoss to blush even more

" Well I reckon I got 'em from my Ma" Hoss said simply Amelia was looking at him making him a bit uncomfortable " I'll bet she was very beautiful" she said kindly

" Yes Ma'am I guess she was, I know my Pa thought so. She was killed by Indians when we were moving out west. I never knew her, I was just a baby when she died. It was Little Joe's mother that I remember and she died to when he was just a little splinter"

" That's too bad, I'm sorry Hoss" Amelia commented softly

" Well that was a long time ago and we all managed to get along just fine. I do think about them sometimes though, especially during bad times in my life. But my Pa sure made our lives seem full enough that's for sure. He really isn't a mean person at all Miss Amelia, honest" Hoss said feeling the need to defend his father

" Oh Hoss, I'm sure he isn't" Amelia said and then dropped her gaze to her folded hands " I never realized how lucky I was to have both parents"

They fell into an awkward silence as they became lost in their own thoughts. Hoss became so distracted he didn't hear his name being called until Amelia said, " Who's that Hoss?"

Hoss looked up to see his younger brother walking toward him and he caught his breath.

" Hey Hoss" Joe called as he jogged up to join them on the stairs

" Uh Miss Amelia, this here's my younger brother, Little Joe" Hoss said when he found his voice again. He tried to warn Joe with his eyes.

Joe smiled pleasantly and took her hand " It's a pleasure to meet you Miss" he said turning on the boyish charm

" Well Mr. Cartwright, it's a pleasure to finally meet you too. Hoss has certainly mentioned you a time or two" she said

" Yeah I'll bet he has, and please call me Joe" Joe said then turned to his brother " Guess who we got a letter from?"

Hoss stopped breathing as he stared at the white envelope Joe held in his hand.

" It's from our older brother " Joe explained to Amelia, seemingly oblivious to Hoss' distress. " He's been gone for quite awhile and this if the first we've heard from him. I guess he'll be coming home soon otherwise he wouldn't be writing to us, ain't that right Hoss?"

Hoss had his teeth clenched tight and had an impulse to shake his brother senseless.

" Hoss you didn't tell me you had another brother, where is he now?" Amelia asked him

Joe was watching his reaction with a broad, smug, smile " Why Hoss, I'm surprised at you. I'll bet there's lots of things he hasn't told you. I'll wager he didn't mention his love for music, art, and poetry either"

Amelia turned to Hoss in amazement " No he didn't, Hoss that's fascinating, tell me who's your favorite poet?"

Hoss felt faint " Uh Ma'am, I uh, I guess I uh........." he stammered not knowing what to say

" Oh come on Hoss, didn't I just see you reading Longfellow last night?" Joe broke in

" Oh I love Longfellow, Hoss why didn't you tell me any of this?" Amelia asked him

" Yeah Hoss, what's wrong with you?" Joe demanded

Hoss was growing furious " Look Joe ain't you got nothing better to do than pester us?" he snarled

Amelia grasped his arm " Oh Hoss, don't be silly, he isn't pestering us, I think he's absolutely refreshing. Listen why don't the three of us go over to the hotel and have some coffee and chat?" she said happily

" Hey that's a great idea, come on Hoss let's go chat" Joe said cheerfully

Hoss was in a turmoil as Amelia looped her arm with Joe's and waited.

" Ma'am me and Little Joe sure got a lot to do today"

" Oh please Hoss, I'm a nervous wreck and don't want to wait for news all by myself" Amelia said sadly " Please Hoss"

Hoss could not bear to see her disappointed " Alright we'll go" he said then suddenly grabbed Joe's arm " Would you excuse us for just a minute?" he said

Amelia nodded and watched with interest as Hoss literally dragged his younger brother off a ways. When he felt they were a safe distance away he held his hand out

" Gimme that letter" he demanded

Joe frowned at him " Hoss I can't do that, it's addressed to Pa"

" Did you read it?"

" Of course not, I just told you it wasn't addressed to us" Hoss made a face of disgust " Well how do you know it's from Adam then?"

" Shhhhhhhhh, what're you doing mentioning his name out loud, you want her to hear?" Joe hissed glancing back at her

" No I don't dadburnit and she better not hear it during this little chat you managed to arrange ya hear?" Hoss said in his most dangerous voice

" Boy you sure are getting cranky, you know that?" Joe said looking at him reproachfully

" You ain't even seen cranky if she gets any more funny information out'a you today" he warned

" Okay, okay, I was just trying to help" Joe said raising his arms

Hoss gave a short laugh " Ha help my eye, you're just startin' trouble as usual"

Joe stared at Hoss for a moment than whispered " Well I for one will be real happy to have Adam back cause you're really starting to get on my nerves" he retorted and marched off without waiting for him

" Yeah I know the feeling" Hoss grumbled as he went to join them. Not wanting to miss anything Joe might tell her, it was too dangerous.

CHAPTER 8

Joe rode up to the house as Hoss looked up from his book. He was sitting up on the porch with his chair propped against the wall.

" Don't be riding her like that you wanna break her down?"

Hoss called out to him as he tied his horse to the hitching rail. Joe rolled his eyes, he was about to tell Hoss he sounded like Adam but thought better of it.

" Hey Hoss what'cha doing?" he said instead as he hopped up on the porch next to him

Hoss regarded him over the top of his book " What's it look like I'm doing? I'm reading"

Joe grabbed the top of the book to read the title " Othello? You gotta be kidding me. Don't you think you might be carrying this a bit too far?"

Hoss frowned and pulled the book away from him without answering.

" Where's Pa?" Joe asked him as he sat down.

" He went into town to get Adam, remember?"

Joe face lit up " Oh yeah he's coming home today, I forgot. Did you figure out what you're gonna tell him, and Amelia come to think of it. And what if Pa runs into her with Adam along, you thought about that?"

Hoss dropped the book to his lap " For your information Amelia went back to San Francisco for about a week to see her family. So I got plenty of time to work things out with our older brother before she gets back"

" Well good luck cause here he comes now" Joe said standing up as the buckboard came around the corner carrying his father and brother. Joe hadn't realized how much he'd really missed his older brother until he caught sight of him and felt a tightness in his chest. He suddenly leapt from the porch and just as Adam
climbed down from the wagon and caught him up in a bear hug and hollered " Hey Adam welcome home"

Adam was caught off guard by his reaction having only expected the usual handshake. But he didn't mind the rare display of affection one bit, it made coming home all the more fun.

" Hey Buddy, look at you" Adam said looking him over " You need a haircut " he said ruffling the tuft of curls at his brother's forehead

" Me, you need a shave. What's that caterpillar doing on your lip?"

Adam touched the new moustache with a smile " Distinguished don't you think?"

" I almost didn't recognize him" Ben said coming around the wagon with the bags " Walked right by him at first"

Hoss joined them " Adam you ole rascal you , we didn't figure you were ever coming home" he said as he flung an arm around his shoulder

" What and never see these faces again, surely you jest" Adam said enjoying his homecoming more and more.

" Come on boys let's get inside and have some lunch. I suspect Hop Sing went all out for this little celebration" Ben said tossing Hoss a carpet bag.

The four of them entered the house together, Ben walking just behind his sons and enjoying the sight of them all together again. They set the bags down just inside the door and Adam looked around taking a deep breath.

" Boys take these bags up to Adam's room for him" Ben said.

Hoss and Joe eagerly obliged which caused Adam's eyebrow to shoot up " Wow maybe I should go away more often if it produces cooperation like that"

Ben laughed and put an arm around his shoulder " Trust me Adam, that's not necessary. And believe it or not that's the most cooperative they've been since you left. In between they've been bickering like school boys. Mark my words there's something going on with those two and I suspect it has something to do with
Miss Gardner"

" Miss Gardner?" Adam said perking with interest

" Oh that's something I wanted to talk to you about. She's going to be the new schoolteacher"

" But I thought we were going to hire Mr. Waters?"

" Well we were until we met this young lady and made the decision to hire her in your absence but I'm sure you'll agree with us that she is most qualified for the job. Anyway the point is I think Hoss is sweet on her"

" And Little Joe isn't giving him a moments peace" Adam said knowingly

Ben nodded with an empathetic smile as they walked to the living room and sat down. True to form Hoss and Joe came down the stairs arguing. Ben turned to his eldest son with a look that said ' See what I mean'

Hop Sing emerged from the kitchen and with a bow announced

" Special dinner will be served now in honor of number one son's return"

" Wow this is great " Adam declared as he rose to join the others

The four men met at the table and sat down. Hop Sing brought steaming platters that emitted mouth watering smells. Ben thought about asking Hop Sing to join them, but always in the past he would refuse. He took his position with the family very seriously and would consider stepping over the line disrespectful.

" You eat, plenty more, and Hop Sing make cake too for this most happy occasion" Hop Sing said and bowing again he retreated to the kitchen.

Adam looked at all the wonderful dishes and remarked to his father " I sure wish he'd join us at times like this"

" I do too Son, but we should respect his wishes. I think that means much more to him" Ben said and then he held out his hands and bowed his head. The four of them clasped hands and all heads lowered as Ben's rich, baritone voice gave thanks

" Dear Lord, we thank thee for the safe return of our loved one and we ask for your continued blessings in all our lives. My we continue to grow in your love and faith, and may we be eternally grateful for your bountiful gifts, Amen"

There was a chorus of Amens from his sons and the physical bond was broken. But the internal, sustainable bond remained.

CHAPTER 9

Adam moved about his room unpacking and putting things away. He would occasionally move to the window to look out and breath in the familiar smell of pine that had been sorely lacking before. He was looking out the window again when there came a knock on his door.

" C'mon in" he called from his seat on the window sill

Hoss entered the room and glanced around " Howdy Adam, I see you're unpacking" he commented

" Just as observant as ever aren't you?" Adam said with a wry grin. Hoss knew he was only teasing him and broke into his big gap toothed smile as he cleared on spot on the bed to sit down.

" You sure were gone a long time Adam, what were you doing?"

Adam moved away from the window and plopped himself into a chair opposite his brother " You fellas really missed me didn't you?" he said pleased with the knowledge

Hoss gave him a look that said 'Don't be too sure of yourself'.

" I hadn't planned on staying so long but I got to thinking that it would be a long time if ever, that I'd see everyone together like that, so it wasn't difficult for them to talk me into staying a couple more weeks. It was a wonderful experience that I'll never forget though"

Hoss looked puzzled by his excitement " Yeah but what all did you do?"

Adam pulled a knee up and his face took on a faraway look " Well we ate at the most extravagant places almost every night. We went to operas and plays, parties all over the area. And we had the most phenomenal discussions, it was like having a month long celebration that went on and on. I loved every minute of it"

Adam glanced at Hoss who didn't appear to be listening anymore

" So what about you fellas, I heard there might be a new lady in your life" Adam said trying to get his attention again

Hoss colored a little " Well not exactly, there's this gal named Amelia. She was hired by the school board to be the new school teacher and ....." Hoss looked at Adam, his face suddenly clouding and growing serious " Adam there's something real important that I need to talk to you about"

Adam dropped his leg to the floor and leaned forward " What's wrong?" he asked growing concerned

" I'm not sure where to start" Hoss said and then abruptly rose to close the door

" Just start from the beginning Hoss" Adam said in a tone he'd used with his brothers for years

Hoss resumed his seat on the bed " Well Adam it's about Miss Amelia. See I kind'a led her to beleive some things that I shouldn't have. And now it's gone so far, I don't know how to get out of it without her thinking me a fool and a liar." Hoss said sighing deeply " I'm in a bind Adam and I need your help"

" You got it " Adam said without any hesitation

Hoss winced as if he'd been slapped " Adam, let me finish cause when I do you may not be so willing to help" he said sadly Adam was curious as to why his brother seemed so disturbed but he let him talk at his own pace.

" You see Adam, those lies I mentioned, well they have to do with you"

" Me?!!" Adam said sitting up straight

Hoss looked truly pained as he went on " Believe me Adam it wasn't intentional but somehow she got the idea that I was you. She wanted the teaching job and figured I, I mean you, being on the school board, could help her out. I know I should'a told her the truth right off but I just didn't have the nerve. I know it
was wrong, I didn't mean for it to go on this long, it seemed so harmless at first. But now I don't know how to tell her the truth" Hoss finished and dropped his shoulders

Adam had been listening quietly and he sat back and said " You know you have to tell her the truth. If she hasn't found out from someone in town already"

" Yeah I know that but she's gonna be out of town for awhile. I am gonna tell her when she gets back for sure. The problem is I don't know what to tell her."

" Well just tell the whole miserable truth, it's the only way" Hoss nodded miserably wishing there was some way out

" What d'ya need from me?" Adam asked him

Hoss met Adam's steady confident gaze and felt a sudden sense of calmness himself. It would be alright, Adam wouldn't let him down, he should've known.

" Thank you Adam, all I ask is that you let me be the one to tell her. I don't want her finding out from anyone else"

" No problem Hoss" Adam said reaching to take Hoss' hat from his head and placing the hat on his own head " I reckon I wouldn't mind being the number two son for awhile"

Hoss' face broke into a delighted grin " Thanks Adam, I knew I could count on you" Hearing footsteps Hoss remembered another concern " Adam I hate to ask you this but could you do me one more favor?"

" Just name it" Adam answered good naturedly

" You suppose you could keep the antagonizer off my back until I get this mess straightened out?"

Hoss had just finished the sentence when Little Joe came walking through the door

" It'd be my pleasure " Adam answered as he smiled at his youngest brother.

" Hey brothers" Joe said and frowned at Adam still wearing Hoss' hat " What's up?"

Hoss and Adam looked at each other smiling " Just call me Hoss" Adam announced

" Oh no big brother, I'm still Hoss, it's a nickname you see. But you're Eric"

Adam contemplated that news then said " Eric, nice name"

" I've always thought so " Hoss agreed proudly

" You mean to tell me you're gonna go along with this insanity?" Joe exclaimed looking at Adam aghast

" Yes I am, and so are you younger brother" Adam informed him just so he'd know Hoss wasn't alone in is secret anymore. Adam startled both brothers when he suddenly jumped up

" I just remembered, I got you something Hoss" he said as he rummaged through his bags looking for something. " You know how yo like to whittle those animals for people, well I saw this and figured you had to have it" Adam stated. He finally found what he was looking for as he produced an object wrapped in brown paper. " Here" he said holding it out to Hoss, Joe quickly moved to his side to see what the package contained.

Hoss stared first at the package and then at Adam " But Adam what's this for?" he asked

" It's for you" Adam said still holding it out for him

Hoss stammered " But Adam.... it ain't my birthday or nothing"

Adam frowned " I know that look I just saw it and wanted you to have it, now take it will ya"

Hoss hesitated for a minute then slowly reached out to take the package. He sat on the bed and slowly started to unwrap it. He looked at the contents and then back at his brother

" They're woodcarving tools, now you can create just about anything you want. In San Francisco I met a man named Wade Blackstone and he did the most beautiful handcrafts I've ever seen. He had wood carvings and leather goods, he even did clay figures that were so realistic they took your breath away. Here look at this" Adam said as he went back into the bags and removed a box. Inside was something wrapped in the same brown paper. Adam removed the paper to reveal a beautiful sculpture of a rearing horse.

Hoss and Joe both reached out to touch it as Adam said " I got this for Pa, you think he'll like it?"

" Boy I'm sure he will" Hoss whispered " Adam you mean I can make something like that with these?"

" Sure once you learn how to use them, I've seen some of the things he made and oh here" he said and pulled a wooden sculpture of a mama bear and two cups from the same box "This goes with the tools, inspiration I call it"

" I don't know how to thank you for these Adam" Hoss said quietly as he ran his fingers over the wooden figure, surprised at how smooth it felt.

" No need, you can make me something real nice when you get the hang of using them things" Adam said happily

Joe was still fingering the statue " Geez Hoss, if yo get where you can make stuff like this" All at once a thought occurred to him " Hey Adam, did you get me anything?"

Adam masked his amusement very well as he said " Gee Joe, I don't think I did, sorry Buddy"

" Oh " Joe muttered trying not to show his disappointment as he turned back to the sculpture. He didn't see Adam go back into the bag and pull out something wrapped in cloth. Adam held it out and tapped his younger brother on the arm with it.

Joe turned around and his mouth fell open as he took the bundle from his brother. He sat down next to Hoss and tentatively removed the cloth. Inside was a beautiful hand tooled gunbelt. Joe's mouth remained open as he turned it over in his hands and examined it closely, running his fingers across the intricate designs. He couldn't believe his eyes, it was indeed the most wonderful thing he'd ever seen.

" Well I'll be Adam, I think you've shut him up for good" Hoss declared, slapping Adam on the back.

" I... I .... I don't know what ...... it's beautiful, thank you Adam" Joe said breathlessly

Adam was in his glory, nothing made him feel better than seeing his family happy. He stomach was in a knot of excitement, nothing would ever feel this good again, he thought.

" Listen you fellas get on out'a here now so I can get my things put away" Adam said guiding them out with a hand on each shoulder. Joe walked off still staring at his gift and inhaling the sweet smell of new leather. Hoss turned at the door and held out his hand, Adam a bit puzzled took it. He saw in Hoss' eyes all that neither one of them could say

" I really am glad you're home Adam" Hoss said. Adam smiled and slapped him on the arm " Me too Hoss" he said

He heaved a great sigh of satisfaction as he watched Hoss walk away. It sure was good to be home amongst the ones who mattered most. He went back to his unpacking when a figure appeared in the doorway. Adam looked up to find his father standing there with arms folded across his chest expectantly

" Well you got something for me?" Ben finally said.

CHAPTER 10

The Cartwright brothers rode along together headed for their annual fall fence inspection. Hoss and Adam had once again exchanged hats and roles for the day simply because it drove Joe crazy. They would only answer to each other's name and Joe was having a hard time ignoring them.

They eventually separated and rode off in different directions agreeing to meet later at a designated spot by the lake to go over their findings for the day and to have a bite to eat. Joe was the first one back and the only one there when Ben rode up.

" Your brothers aren't back yet?" Ben said looking around

" Well you don't see them anywhere do you?" Joe answered sarcastically

" Joseph, there's no need to be insolent with me" Ben warned Joe frowned and mumbled his apologies " Sorry Pa, I ain't exactly in a good mood" he explained

" I know that but save your sarcasm for your brothers if you don't mind"

" Yes Sir" Joe answered scowling unhappily

" When you see your brother tell him Amelia was up to the house calling on him" Ben said

" Hoss or Adam?" Joe asked innocently

" Joseph don't try my patience" Ben boomed " You know perfectly well who I'm talking about, now just give him the message" he shouted and turned and galloped off

Joe grumbled to himself as he went to the lake to wash some of the trail dust off. Not long after his brothers came riding up wearing the same smug smiles and each other's hats. Joe decided there and then he was not going to be singled out and he was just going to have to find a way to even things up a little, one way
or another.

" Boy am I hungry, just about starved is more like it" Adam remarked as he dismounted and pulled their lunch from his saddlebags

Joe made a face behind his back and mimicked his words. He sat down with his brothers as Adam passed the food around, waiting for his chance. He'd made up his mind that he could play the same game too. Turning to Adam he said " Hey Hoss, your lady friend was up at the house looking for you"

Adam stopped chewing and looked at Hoss who nearly choked on his as he grabbed Joe's arm " She was here?" he exclaimed

Joe turned to Hoss and with a straight face said " I'm not talking to you, I'm talking to Hoss here so mind your own business"

" Little Joe I ain't fooling, now was she here or not?" Hoss demanded to know

Joe looked back at Adam and rolled his eyes " Boy he's got some nerve ain't he " he said

" You better tell him what he wants to know" Adam warned as he took another bite of chicken.

" He's right " Hoss said tightening his grip on Joe's arm " If you don't speak up real quick like, you're gonna go for a swim"

" You wouldn't dare" Joe challenged, but one look at his brothers told him different " Alright alright, Pa came out and said she'd come up to the house looking for you, that's all he said" Joe said quickly and pulled his arm free

" Well that's more like it little brother, glad to see you come to your senses" Hoss was about to turn back to his meal when he heard Joe mumble " Ingrates"

Adam heard it too and the two older brothers exchanged a glance that had Joe up and running toward the horses. He almost made it but was tackled to the ground by both brothers. There was soon a three man wrestling match as he struggled to get free of them as they tried to grab his arms and legs. In all the ruckus the horses spooked and ran took off running for home. " The horses, the horses" Joe hollered hoping to distract them from their intentions. Then realizing he was defeated tried "

Okay, okay, I'm sorry. Come on guys let me go"

Hoss and Adam grinned at each other, Hoss said " He's right you know, we ought'a let him go"

Adam was sitting on Joe's legs and catching Hoss' wink said " Alright if that's what he wants" and he winked back. And together they tossed him in the water. What they hadn't counted on was Joe taking them with him as the three of them tumbled in together. The afternoon air was soon filled with loud splashing and laughter as three brothers took turns dunking one another.

At one point Hoss hat went under to which Adam cried " Wait, my hat, I lost my hat" His reward was being pulled under water by both brothers.

Sometime later the three of them began the long trek home, on foot. They were talking back and forth happily when they heard the unmistakable sound of hoofbeats. Within minutes their father stopped in front of them

" What the devil happened to you boys? I thought the worst when your horses came back without you"

" Well Pa" Hoss began but seeing the fire in his father's eyes, changed his mind " You tell him Adam"

Adam scowled at him " Oh now I'm Adam, I thought I was Hoss"

Joe put a hand on his shoulder and whispered " No,no, you're

Eric remember?" he reminded him

" Well Adam?" Ben said impatiently

Adam shifted his weight from one foot to the other, the water in his boots made a squishing sound. " Well the truth is Pa, our horses spooked as we were riding by the lake and dumped us right in the water" he said without a flinch

Ben eyed him suspiciously as Joe and Hoss turned away smiling.

" You expect me to believe that? Ben said with a withering stare " What exactly was it that spooked them?"

Adam looked to his brothers but no help was forthcoming " Lightening" he said finally

Ben looked up at the clear blue sky and back at his eldest son. A slow smile appeared on his face as he looked at the other two. " I'll see you boys back at the house" he said simply and turned his horse and slowly rode away.

When he was out of sight Joe turned to his brothers and said "Whew, I that was close, I thought we were in trouble for a minute there"

Hoss looked at Adam and shook his head sadly " In case you didn't figure it out, we gotta walk all the way home, what d'ya call that?"

Joe was smirking when he said " Well what's the problem, you fellas getting too old for a little stroll?" and the pursuit was on as Joe took off running.

Hours later they walked into the front yard together, laughing, wet and thoroughly happy.

CHAPTER 11

About a week after returning home Adam decided to shave off his moustache. It had seemed to suit him while he was in San Francisco, but here at home it suddenly seemed silly to him. Although that puzzled him, he didn't try to figure it out and just went ahead and shaved it off.

At breakfast Saturday morning Hoss said " Hey Adam, I us have to go in to town for supplies, you wanna come along?"

" Sure Hoss" Adam said as he helped himself to more flapjacks

" Hey I wouldn't mind going along with you fellas" Joe said hopefully, he didn't want to miss out on anything important

" Now look Little Joe, there ain't no call for you to tag along" Hoss said sternly

Ben who'd been listening, sensed that Hoss wanted only Adam to accompany him so without asking any questions, he decided to intervene " Uh, Joseph, wouldn't you rather spend the day with me?" he said

Joe turned to his father, something in Ben's tone told him it wasn't really a request. He didn't bother to answer but only went back to eating adopting a solemn expression

Hoss gave his father a grateful smile as he sighed with relief. After breakfast he and Adam hitched up the buckboard and headed into town.

They stopped in front of the mercantile and hopped down off the wagon. They were walking into the store when Hoss suddenly grabbed Adam's arm

" There she is Adam and she's headin' this way" Hoss whispered Adam looked in the direction Hoss was staring and watched her approach with admiration for his brother's judgement Amelia came up to the them seemingly unaware of Adam

" Oh Hoss, I'm so glad to see you, I wanted to thank you again for helping me get that job. I'd love to repay you somehow" she said

Hoss waved a hand at her " Aw Miss Amelia it weren't nothing, there ain't no need to repay me" he said

Adam was smiling to himself at the english Hoss was using in the presence of the new schoolteacher. Hoss remembered Adam standing next to him and put a hand on his shoulder

" Miss Amelia, I'd like you to meet my older brother, this here is ......" Hoss stopped in midsentence and Adam turned to look at him as he quietly finished "....Adam"

Amelia took Adam's extended hand and said " Oh you must be the one who was in San Francisco, well it's ....... Adam, but I thought you said your name was Adam?" she said looking back at Hoss.

Hoss wrinkled his nose with frustration, it was time to fess

up " Ma'am my name is Eric and Hoss is my nickname, this here is Adam Cartwright"

Amelia looked from one to the other in confusion " I don't understand" she said feeling very silly

Adam hadn't expected Hoss to confront her with the truth so quickly and decided to give them a little privacy as he excused himself " Excuse me Ma'am, uh Hoss I'm gonna get that stuff for Pa" he turned to Amelia and touched his hat " Ma'am" he said and went into the store, this was something Hoss would have to do on
his own.

Amelia was still looking up at him waiting for an explanation.

Hoss took off his hat and turned it around and around in his hands " Ma'am I been trying to figure out a way to tell you this for a long time but I just didn't know how. See the reason I didn't go to the board meetin' was cause I ain't even on the school board, only my Pa and Adam are. Well when you thought I wa him and that I could help you, I just wanted to do what I could so I didn't bother to tell you. You see I was real fond of you right from the beginning, as soon as I saw you I knew you were special and it felt good being able to be of some help to you, I would'a done anything. You see I thought that maybe eventually you and me, I mean you and I, well maybe we could...."

Amelia suddenly cried " Oh Hoss" and hurried away

Hoss had expected her reaction, but not the pain he now felt

" I guess she didn't take it too well" he heard Adam's voice say at his shoulder

" No sir, she sure didn't " Hoss said still looking in the diection she'd gone " Did you get everything on the list?" he said turning to face Adam

" Uh yeah I did, we just have to load it now" Adam said watching his brother's face " Listen Hoss you think you can load this up by yourself? I want to go see if Bill is in town."

" Sure I can, why what are you up to?" Hoss said knowing his brother all to well

" Now what makes you say that? I've been gone a long time and I just want to get caught up on things that's all" Adam assured him

" Alright Adam you go ahead, I'll load this stuff and I'll meet you back here"

" Thanks Hoss, I'll see you later" Adam said as he slapped him on the back and walked away.

A few minutes later he found himself at the hotel and outside Amelia Gardner's door. He took a deep breath and knocked lightly

" Who is it?" he heard her call

" It's Adam Cartwright Miss Gardner, I wonder if I might speak iwth you a moment?" Adam answered and waited, listening to the muffled sounds behind the door. He took off his hat and fingered the band, then looked up when the door slowly opened

" Come in Mr. Cartwright" Amelia said as she held the door open

Adam stepped into the room and watched as she tried to hide the evidence of her tears. He turned away to give her a chance to collect herself.

" Won't you sit down Mr. Cartwright" she said catching his attention. Adam turned and waited for her to seat herself, then he did the same

" Miss Amelia, I wanted to talk to you about my brother Hoss" Adam said

" Is that his real name or do you have another brother somewhere?" Amelia said sharply

" Ma'am he didn't mean to decieve you, it was simply a misunderstanding that got out of hand. Hoss wouldn't intentionally hurt anyone" Adam explained

To Adam's surprise she smiled " I know that, I'm not really upset with him about it. Actually it was my mistake, I was the one who got your identies mixed up. And to be honest he never really did answer to anything but Hoss. By the way who is Eric? Adam smiled " Well actually Eric really is his given name and like he told you Hoss is his nickname. No one ever calls him Eric anymore, except Pa occasionally" he said

Amelia smiled remembering Hoss telling her the same thing " Yes so I've heard" she said softly

Adam leaned forward a little and asked " Ma'am if you don't mind my asking if you're not upset with Hoss then why did you run off like that?"

Amelia's smile vanished and she dropped her eyes, fiddling with the hankerchief in her hands.

" Mr. Cartwright I think your brother is the sweetest, kindest man I've ever met " she said

" But " Adam said providing the word he intuitively knew she'd left out

" I only wish I'd met him two years ago" Amelia said and then hesitated a moment " Because you see Mr. Cartwright I'm betrothed, my fiance wil be here in September. He already has a job secured here at the bank"

" Oh, I was afraid it was something like that" Adam said wishing she hadn't said it, but mostly that he hadn't come. Amelia looked at Adam with an almost pleading look " I really had no idea how Hoss was feeling, and I did so enjoy his company. Even though I'm not sure how much of it was sincere. I suspect he was trying to fill the role of Adam Cartwright as much as possible"

Adam smiled " Well I don't think that would be an easy task for anybody. Although I'm sure the real Hoss was pretty obvious to woman like yourself"

" Yes he was " Amelia agreed " He's a very special person"

" I'd have to agree with you there, I hope that someday someone very much like you will come along and see that too" Amelia put a hand on Adam's arm " Someone will Adam, I'm sure of that" She paused and took a deep breath " Is Hoss still in town, I'll need to talk to him"

" He's still at the mercantile waiting for me" Adam stated " Miss Gardner I'd appreciate it if you didn't mention that I was here" he said knowing Hoss might not like the idea Amelia smiled her understanding " You love him very much don't you?" she asked him.

It was not the kind of question Adam was accustomed to or prepared for and he felt his face turn red " Yes I do, I consider our family blessed " he said concealing his slight discomfort. " I'm glad, at least it makes what I have to tell him just a little easier, knowing he'll have his family for support" Amelia siad as she rose from her seat. Adam did the same and followed her to the door

" Thank you for your understanding" Adam said offering his hand.

Amelia took his hand and remembering something his brothers had said she quipped " I have some of Longfellow's best work if you'd like to borrow it sometime"

Adam wasn't sure what she meant but within minutes he could guess. He smiled as he put his hat on and tipped it in a farewell gesture.

Sometime later Hoss found him at the Bucket O Blood saloon sitting at a table with a shot glass and a bottle. He joined him without a word.

" You want a drink?" Adam asked him, unsure of what to say " Nah, that's the last thing I need right now" Hoss said as he folded his big hands. Adam was watching him wishing he knew what to say " You okay?" he finally asked

" Why am I always just missin' out Adam, am I always gonna be alone?" Hoss said beseechingly

Adam didn't know how to answer that question. It was something he often wondered himself, he didn't know the answer. Adam didn't like not having an answer when his brothers needed one.

" It ain't like I blame them though, I ain't exactly pleasant to look at " Hoss said grimly

" Now hold on a minute Hoss, don't be putting yourself down like that" Adam said growing frustrated

" Aw it's alright Adam, I reckon I ought'a just get used to it"

Adam hated to hear him talk like that " Hoss if you're looking for a lady who's only interested in good looks, you'll be better off alone" he said sternly

Hoss just shrugged like it didn't matter

" Look Hoss I can just about guarantee you that will find the one you're looking for, but not if you give up. First of all you have to be yourself and be proud of who you are, you know that"

Hoss nodded but Adam couldn't tell if he was really listening

" You know Amelia even said she could've fallen for you real easy if she hadn't already been spoken for"

Hoss looked at Adam for the first time " Really, she said that?"

" Yes she said that and she meant it" Yes she said that and she meant your shoes are just too big for anyone to try and fill, even me" Adam chuckled and
held his glass up " To lost love" he proclaimed " To lost love" Hoss repeated and they drained the glasses. Without a word

The End


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