The Long Goodbye
By: Stephen
“Now
remember, straight home after school!” Joe instructed his son, Benjamin
Cartwright. “You seem to be getting in a
lot of fights recently, and it’s not showing a good example to your little
sister now is it?”
Benjamin
bowed his head. “No sir, I will be home as soon as school is finished,” he
mumbled.
Joe
helped his children with their bags and shuffled them out of the door. “Be good!” he yelled after them as they ran
down the street towards the school. He smiled to himself because he knew what
he was like at that age. He wasn’t
exactly the most well behaved Cartwright brother. It was he and his brother
Hoss; the two of them were the school clowns.
He always talked Hoss into some mischievous task, and it always ended up
Hoss being caught.
A few
tears trickled down Joe’s face, it had been years since his brother’s death,
and he was still devastated by it.
Joe
wandered into the kitchen. It was a
mess. Ever since Annabelle, his wife had left to stay with her parents for a
while; Joe found it incredibly difficult to keep up with the housework.
”Wish Hop-Sing was here!” Joe laughed to himself. He imagined what the Chinese
cook would say.
“You make mess of kitchen, now I have to
clean it!” Then he would mumble something in Chinese.
That
night Joe was really uncomfortable in bed.
He just could not settle, he tossed and turned for most of the
night. When he did fall asleep it was
far from peaceful. His subconscious was telling him something was wrong. He
dreamt that he was getting farther and farther away from his Pa, Ben
Cartwright. His arms outstretched yelling “
Suddenly Joe
sat up in bed. Sweat was pouring from his brow, he had no idea what that dream
was about.
He laid
his head back on the pillow, and shut his eyes.
He could see images in his mind of the dream; he wished it would go
away.
He didn’t
have much time to drift back to sleep. A sound of a carriage rumbling towards
the house woke him up.
“What is
that?” Joe mumbled as he sat up. He
glanced at his clock; he had to focus on it for a minute to actually see
it.
“Who is out here at three-thirty in the
morning?” he asked himself. He wasn’t surprised as he had seen and heard some
strange things happening since he moved there.
He
grabbed his robe and threw it on. As he
left the room he picked up his pistol that was sitting on the dresser next to
the door.
He slowly
headed down the stairs toward the front door. He was just going to have a look
outside and see who was there, hoping it wasn’t any criminals. As he reached
the bottom step, someone banged at the door, and shouted “JOE!”
***************
Joe
walked over to the door and swung it open. He stared in disbelief. It couldn’t
be, not at this time of the morning. Standing there was his older brother,
Adam, whom he hadn’t seen since their brother Hoss had
died. The look on Adam’s face made Joe’s
heart skip a beat. “It’s Pa, isn’t it?” Joe asked softly.
Adam
nodded. “Can I come in?” Joe stood aside to let his brother walk in, then he shut the door quietly. He tried to hold back the tears until he got
sat down with Adam.
He slowly
walked towards the room Adam went in, hesitating at the door. He knew as soon as he walked through this
door his life would change forever.
Joe sat
next to Adam, and hung his head. The
brothers remained silent for a while; they both had no idea what to say to each
other. Eventually Adam spoke softly. “Pa
wants you to come home,” he said as he turned his head towards Joe.
Joe lifted
his head. “Is it bad?” he asked letting a tear roll down his cheek.
Adam
looked his brother in the eye, and gently placed a hand on his shoulder. “He’s
dying Joe…” He couldn’t go on; he gave in to the emotion. He let tears stream
down his face.
“No!” Joe
said quietly. “He can’t be; he wasn’t ill!”
Adam
managed to wipe the tears away. “He became ill all of a sudden,
the doctor says he has a matter of weeks left!”
Joe put
his hand on
Adam
closed his eyes. “When I left the doctor was giving him something for the pain,
but that’s all it is going to do for him”
Joe
couldn’t stop himself; he leant into his brother for a hug and wept
uncontrollably. Adam looked up and
whispered, “Hold on, Pa, we are coming home!”
***************
For the
rest of the night, Adam and Joe sat up talking about their Pa, and reminiscing
about their younger years when they stayed on the Ponderosa.
Just as
the sun broke through the clouds the next morning, Benjamin walked in and
yelled, “Uncle Adam, what are you doing here?”
”Hey kiddo!” Adam smiled. “Well you sure have grown since the last time I saw
you!”
“Benj,”
Joe said quietly, “I need you to go and wake your sister up, we
are going to the Ponderosa for a while.
Pack as much as you can, I don’t know how long we are going to be.”
“Okay,
Pa,” Benj said as he bounded back up the stairs to his sisters room.
An hour
later, they were sitting on the stage heading to
Suddenly
Adam started grinning. Joe glanced up, what could he be grinning about?
“What’s so funny, Adam?” Joe asked
curiously.
“Just
remembered a letter I received from Pa years ago” Adam said, his grin widening.
“Which
letter was that?” Joe asked. Deep down he knew this would end up him feeling
really embarrassed.
“As I
recall, Pa told me you had tried to make it as a detective.” Adam sneered.
“Oh
no!” Joe cringed.
“According
to Pa, you beat Pa and the Deputy up, you got jailed overnight, you assisted in
a bank robbery, and you beat Pa and the Deputy up again!” Adam said trying to
hold back the hilarity.
“Yeah,
yeah,” Joe said feeling rather sheepish, “But did Pa tell you Hoss and I solved
the mystery!”
Adam
laughed and turned to look out the window, “I wish I had been there.”
“You went
to live your life, we all appreciated that!” Joe said trying to reassure his
brother.
“No I
meant, I wish I had never left the Ponderosa, I was
foolish!” Adam said lowering his head.
Joe had
no idea what to say, he decided to leave the conversation there, and change the
subject.
”Well I noticed, you went bald” Joe said, “and that
beard…” Joe paused, how could he comment on it, “Well, its
certainly different.” Joe said mockingly, trying very hard to hold back his
laughter.
Adam
glared at him, ‘At least he didn’t comment on my weight,” Adam thought.
“Oh by
the way big brother,” Joe laughed, “You certainly have filled out eh?” He
couldn’t have put it more subtly.
Adam
raised his eyebrows, “Joe, there are a lot about you that has changed!”
“Yeah,
like what?” Joe sat back and folded his arms.
“Well….” Adam started.
“Pa! Adam!” Benj shouted, “We are coming up to
Joe laughed as he put on his jacket, and got
ready to get off the stage.
****************
The
driver opened the stage door, and let Adam and Joe out.
“How are
we getting to the Ponderosa?” Joe asked.
“I’m
taking you!” a deep voice said. Joe spun around.
“Jamie!” he exclaimed. “How have you been?”
Jamie, who now sported a moustache
replied “Fantastic, I am now deputy of
“What?”
Joe gasped. “That’s incredible!”
“Anyway
we had better be going!” Jamie said as he helped Joe load his bags onto the
buckboard. Joes children jumped up too, “Jamie, I would like you to meet my
son, Benj, and my daughter Sarah”
“How do”
Jamie smiled and they headed towards the Ponderosa.
Joe knew
the road well; he travelled it nearly every day when he had stayed at the
Ponderosa. Somehow, Joe felt it was
longer. Everything seemed to go in slow
motion. The sun was blistering that day. The surrounding land was silent. No birds singing, no wind blowing through the
hills, and no sound of any sort of wildlife.
Eventually
the house came into view. Initially it was only the chimney that was in view,
and gradually more of the house appeared.
Eventually the buckboard pulled up outside the house.
“You ready Joe?” Adam asked softly.
Joe
nodded, he felt sick. He was terrified, he had no idea what to expect. He
didn’t know if his Pa was still alive.
All of a
sudden the front door was swung open, standing there was the doctor.
“Hi Adam,
Joe!” he said calmly. “Your Pa is asking for you”
Joe felt
a huge weight lift from his gut; he was so relieved he could see his Pa for the
last time.
Joe and
Adam put their arms on each other’s shoulders, and slowly walked into the
house.
Joe
turned around, “Benj, Sarah, you stay down here, go explore if you like,” he
said, he felt a lump in his throat. “Jamie, we would like you to come up with
us!”
Jamie
laid the bags down in the sitting room and followed his adopted brothers up the
stairs, he too was feeling very nervous.
**************
Joe was
the first to Ben’s door. He paused and took
a deep breath. He felt his hand turn and pushed the door open.
“Pa!” Joe
cried, and ran toward Ben who was sitting up in his bed. He had lost all colour to his face, the usual
bright colour that had once filled his cheeks was now gone.
“Joe,”
Ben shouted. Joe kneeled down beside the bed.
Ben grabbed his son in a loving embrace. The two sat together crying
into each other’s arms. Ben was so
relieved God allowed him to see his youngest son for one last time. On the
other hand, Joe was devastated that this may be the last time he ever saw his
“How you
been?” Ben eventually asked. “Good, Pa!” Joe sniffed.
“Wish I
could say the same for me son,” Ben said.
Joe
buried his face into his Pas’ arm once more, he couldn’t speak, he just felt like the world had opened up and swallowed him.
Adam and
Jamie walked in next; they sat down on the chairs next to Joe. Ben looked up “Adam, Jamie!” he choked. “Its
great to see you both”
Five minutes passed where the room was silent.
Everyone just sat staring down at their feet, and Joe still leaning
against Ben.
Eventually
Ben spoke, “I.I am so happy you are all here, I
couldn’t ask for anything else!” He sounded really weak.
“You are all my family, and I couldn’t
be any prouder of you all. Joe you have a lovely wife and amazing children!”
Joe started to cry again, this was so difficult for him. Ben put his hand onto his sons shoulder.
“Adam,
my oldest. You have
made me so proud. You have proved yourself to be a great doctor. Even though
you stay on the other side of the country, you have always been on the Ponderosa, it wouldn’t be the Ponderosa without you!”
Adam
walked over to his Pa and held his hand. “You have always been there for me Pa,
and I will never forget it.” Ben held
his two sons, and looked over to Jamie. “As for you, young
man!” Ben started. “You have always been like a part of this family,
ever since we took you in. I never want you to change, ever!” Jamie looked up,
“Thanks Pa, I will never forget you, I promise!”
Once
again the room fell silent. The distant laughing and joking of Sarah and Benj
was heard every so often, through the window.
A
knocking at the door eventually broke the silence. The doctor walked in, “Ben, we better get you lying down, sitting up is not good for you!” He walked
over to the bed, and Joe helped him lie Ben down.
Adam
walked with the doctor out of the door. “How long do you think he has?” Adam
asked quietly.
“Hard
to tell, maybe an hour or less. Sorry Adam” the doctor
said as he walked down the stairs.
He went
back into the room, and closed the door behind him. He sat back down on the bed, just as Bens
eyes opened.
“My sons’” he whispered.
“Yeah,
Pa!” Joe said wiping a tear from his cheek.
“It’s
happening,” he said closing his eyes.
“
Jamie stood up and stood beside Adam. Ben raised both his hands; Joe and Adam
placed their hands in his. Jamie started
to cry, and hung his head.
Ben’s closed his eyes slowly, and he was gone.
Adam, Joe
and Jamie sat with Ben, for an hour, holding each other’s hand and praying to
God.
The next
day Joe stood with Adam at Bens grave. The sun was once again blazing down on them.
The birds were singing in the trees, and a cool breeze sailed through hills.
Joe read his Pa’s gravestone
Here lies
Benjamin Cartwright
Not just a
father,
But a hero
to all
Later
that day, Joe put his children onto the buggy with their bags. “Give me a minute,” he said as he walked into
the house. He looked around at the living room; this was it, the end of an
era. He took one last look around, and
smiled remembering the usual phrase that was used in that room, “Joe, feet off
the table.”
He turned around and walked out of the house, closing the door behind him. Leaving a legacy behind him.