Marsha
Colyer
KNOCKIN’ ON HEAVEN’S DOOR
The scene played out before him was all
too familiar to Dr. Martin. The young
man with the raven black hair in the bed, his skin so ashen it blended with the
sheets, the older man sitting on the edge of the bed trying to give him some
measure of comfort as yet another spasm of coughing took him. “Why can’t this family ever do anything
simple?” he
thought to himself.
Dr. Martin felt
helpless. He’d brought this one through
so many maladies…gunshot wounds, arrows, broken bones, fevers, and at one
point, a bout of pneumonia…so many times, now this…There was nothing he could
do, the damage caused by a simple, unknown germ was already done and he had no
idea how to fix it. Doc yanked the
useless stethoscope from around his neck and slammed it into his bag as he
watched Ben once again wipe the sweat from his eldest’s
fevered brow.
“That was a bad one
wasn’t it son?” he lovingly asked the barely conscious figure lying before
him. Paul laid a hand on his shoulder,
trying to gain his attention. “Ben can I talk to you out in the hall?” in an almost
whispered voice he added, “Adam doesn’t need to hear this right now.”
Ben gave his friend
an inquisitive look as he got up to follow, but not before pulling the
comforter back over Adam’s sweat drenched chest and placed a fresh, cool towel
on his forehead.
“Can we hurry this
up? I need to get back to Adam.” As he closed the door to Adam’s room he
turned to the good Dr. “This is going to
be a rough one isn’t it Paul?” Ben’s
fears rose exponentially, as Paul’s eyes seemed to connect with everything but
him. “He is going to get over this isn’t
he?” He could detect tears beginning to
pool in the Dr.’s eyes.
“Paul?” He asked, the alarm
mounting as the seconds ticked by and doc remained silent.
Dr. Martin took a deep
breath before continuing, trying to keep his emotions in check. Adam and his brothers meant more to him than
he cared to admit. He had watched them
grow into the fine, strapping young men they were. They were almost his family. Now this. It just wasn’t fair!
“I know the cattle
drive should be about over, how far away do you think Hoss
and Joe are about now?” Ben stood
staring at the dr., not answering. What
did his other sons have to do with this?
When they left, Adam only had a cold.
Granted it was a bad one but, still, it was only a cold. “Ben”, he repeated, “where are Hoss and Joe?” he asked gently.
“They should be
somewhere around Beaver Ridge, they’ll be home late tomorrow evening at the
latest…why?!?” Paul’s eyes dropped to
the floor and his mouth remained closed.
“For God’s sake Paul tell me!” He
demanded. A tear was slowly making it’s way down the dr.’s face when his eyes finally connected
again with his friend’s. Paul’s next
words were spoken at barely above a whisper but, they sounded as a foghorn to
the distraught father before him.
“Send someone after
Little Joe and Hoss; they need to be here.”
Ben felt as if he had
been gored in the heart by a 1200 lb. bull’s horn. His legs no longer had the strength to keep
him upright. He collapsed to his knees
in the middle of the hallway, his hands covering his face as heart wrenching
sobs ripped from his very soul.. Not his beloved eldest! His trusted right hand! They started this journey together, he
couldn’t leave him now! How many more
loved ones was he going to have to loose?!?
His sons were supposed to bury him, not the other way around!
“Please God NNOO! Liz it’s not his time! You can’t have him
yet!” He screamed to the heavens. Paul helped him to his feet and steered him
toward the stairs.
“Adam will be alright
by himself for a few minutes. Let’s go
downstairs for a bit, He doesn’t need to hear any of this right now.” Ben was almost catatonic as he descended the
stairs, tears still streaming down his face.
As if by magic, Hop
Sing appeared at the base of the stairs and led Ben to his favorite chair by
the fireplace. Ben didn’t even seem to
notice. Dr. Martin asked the cook to
make some tea for the two of them and then come join them. “You need to hear this too.”
While
Ben sat motionless in his chair, staring into…nothing, tears still making their
way down the face that looked as if it had aged 20 years in the last few
minutes, Paul. made his way to the bunkhouse in
search of Clem, the Cartwright’s trusted foreman who had to stay behind,
nursing a slight cold himself. He
instructed the foreman to ride to Beaver Ridge to meet up with the cattle drive
and to get Joe and Hoss home immediately.
When he returned to the
great room of the house, he found Hop Sing setting quietly on the settee, the
teapot on the coffee table before them, and a brandy decanter sitting beside
it. He smiled at the diminutive cook;
“Good thinking Hop Sing. I was going to
give him a mild sedative but, I like your idea better.” He poured a measure of brandy into a teacup
and added just a little tea before handing it to Ben. As he seated himself on the hearth, he
watching as Ben mechanically sip at the cup. It didn’t seem to be working, but he
proceeded anyway.
=================
After a headlong,
record breaking trip from the main house, Celm rode into the drover’s campsite
to the sounds of boisterous laughter, Hoss and Joe
Cartwright among the men settling in for the night.
“Hey Celm!” Called Hoss as he helped himself to a cup
of coffee at the chuck wagon.
“Want some coffee while I’m here?”
“Hey Clem” called Joe
as he rounded the wagon from the other side.
“What brings you this far out? We would have been home tomorrow
night.” Joe grinned mischievously, his
emerald green eyes dancing in the dwindling daylight. “Ah, did ya miss
us?!?”
Hoss
chuckled as he took a sip of his now lukewarm coffee before his eyes took in
the lathered state of Clem’s horse and noticed that the foreman wasn’t laughing
at Joe’s joke. “What’s wrong?” he asked
anxiously, his coffee all but forgotten. “Pa?”
“You’re pa’s fine, I
was just told to take over here and to get you two home as quick as your horses
can get you there.” He explained as he dismounted and led his horse in the
direction of the makeshift corral to give him a rub down and food for the
night.
The brothers exchanged
worried glances and stood as if frozen for an instant. If it wasn’t pa, then it could only mean…In
unison, one name came to their lips that seemed to bring both back to life…
”ADAM!”
As one they sprang into
action. Working with extreme precision,
Joe untied the horses and tossed the saddle blankets over Chubb and Cochise as Hoss picked up both saddles at once and met him. He dropped Cochise’s
saddle beside the pony and lifted Chubb’s over his back before moving to the
other. As he placed the saddle on
Cochise, Joe was tightening the chinches on Chubb. In less than two minutes, they were speeding
off into the night toward home and their beloved older brother. They left Clem to explain to the other men
what was happening. Luckily it was a
cloudless, full moonlit night.
==========
The sun was just
beginning to make it’s presence known as they reigned
Coschise and Chubby to a screeching halt outside the house, beside the dr’s
buggy. Luckily, one of the hands came
out of the bunkhouse to take charge of the animals as neither bothered to stable
their mounts, racing for the door, nearly taking it from it’s
hinges on their way through. Their
concern turned to terror as they realized the first floor was deserted. Not even Hop Sing’s usual ranting could be
heard in the kitchen, and the normally roaring fire in the massive fireplace
was slowly dying out for lack of attention.
Hoss and Joe exchanged a terrified look before bounding up the stairs
almost as one. The scene playing out
before them in their big brother’s bedroom stopped the pair dead in their
tracks.
On the far side of the
room, Dr. Martin sat at Adam’s desk, quietly keeping an eagle eye on his
patient. Hop Sing stood silently at the
window, a bloody towel hanging loosely from his hand, and tears silently
streaming down his face. The boys
anxiety increased as none of them had never seen the little man shed a tear no
matter how bad things got, or how badly any of them were injured. Ben sat on Adam’s bed propped against the
headboard with Adam leaning against him, almost sitting on his lap.
Adam was so weak he
could no longer hold his head up. He
attempted to at least smile an acknowledgement at his little brothers to
reassure them that everything was fine but it took more effort then he could
manage at the moment. He wasn’t even
protesting being treated as a small infant.
He just lay there with his head resting on his father’s chest, his ear
close enough to hear his heartbeat. It
was the sound of that heartbeat that had given him strength and comfort for as
long as he could remember.
Ben could see the fear in his two youngest's eyes as they stood
silently staring at the two of them.
Paul rose from the
desk, took each of them by the arm, and led them into the hallway. When the door closed behind them, Joe was the
first to break the silence.
“Dr. Martin, please
tell me this is just a really sick joke on Adam’s part!” He begged desperately tears threatening to
flood his cheeks as they already were for Hoss.
Dr. Martin paused for a
moment before speaking. “I’m sorry boys,
I can’t do that. Adam’s trying to put up
a brave front for your father’s sake, but it isn’t working. They know he doesn’t have much time left,
that’s why I sent for you.”
Hoss
reached a silent hand out for Joe and drew him into a desperate embrace. Paul placed a comforting hand on each of
their shoulders as they tried to draw strength from one another. Dr. Martin
stood sentry over the boys, a hopefully comforting hand on each shoulder as the
tears flowed freely for a few moments there in the hallway, only to be interrupted
by the sounds of a coughing fit from the other side of the door.
“Excuse me.” Paul muttered as he darted back to his
patient.
Joe and Hoss wiped
their eyes and followed closely behind.
They had to remain strong for pa’s sake and for Adam’s. Inside they stood at the foot of the bed out
of the dr’s way and watched as Ben held a towel to Adam’s mouth as he coughed
up what looked like a great amount of blood.
Paul wiped a cool cloth over his face as the coughing subsided.
“There now Adam” he
tried to sound chipper as he dipped the cloth into the basin Hop Sing sat on
the night table. “That one’s over.”
“Dr.” came a small voice from behind him. It was Little Joe. “Can I do that?” He asked, indicating the cloth he was about
to use to wash the blood off Adam’s face.
Dr. Martin silently
handed the cloth to Joe and returned to the desk to sit. Joe, his eyes still glistening with tears,
sat on the bed beside his father and smiled bravely at his big brother. Hoss sat on the other side of the bed and
reached out for Adam’s hand.
Joe tried to smile as
he began cleaning Adam’s face. “I swear
big brother”; he started, not looking directly at him for fear of not being
able to control the tears that were welling up in his eyes. “And you’re always getting on me for making a
mess.”
Adam smiled weakly from
his position on Ben’s shoulder. He
looked from Joe to Hoss, then raised his head slightly
to look at his father’s face. It was as
if he had been waiting for all those he loved more than life itself to be
together so he could finally let go. As
Ben looked into his eyes, he saw the life draining out of Adam’s as they closed
for the last time, his head dropping back to his shoulder.
“NO!” cried Ben, his
hand flying to his son’s face. “No son…please don’t leave me! LIZ please…he hasn’t lived yet! ADAM…”
Adam could still hear
him and could still hear the cries of his brothers but they seemed to be
getting farther and farther away. He
tried to answer them, but the harder he tried, the faster they moved away from
him. In the distance he hear his father’s distinctive “ADAM!” fad into the
wind.
Suddenly, it was
getting closer…no wait a minute…that’s Joe…no, not unless Joe’s trying to
imitate a woman again.
“AAAdammm.” He heard, and soon felt a tiny, almost
delicate hand touching his shoulder ‘Nope’, he thought, ‘definitely not Joe.’
“Come on Adam open your
eyes!” he heard again. ‘Maybe Hoss’. He thought, still
not sure if he wanted to comply.. ‘Wait a minute…Hoss…tiny
hands…not in this life time!’
“Come on dude.” The
female voice was beginning to sound impatient “We haven’t got all day!”
With that, Adam’s eyes
shot open. He looked at his
surroundings. He was still in his room,
but something wasn’t right. He was alone
except for the short, slightly stocky female before him with curly blond hair
and hazel eyes that seemed to dance with mischief under bronze, wire rimmed
glassed.
“Who-are-you?” he asked sitting up
effortlessly in the bed. He stopped
short of jumping out of bed when he realized the pain in his chest was gone and
he could breath without coughing up blood.
“Don’t tell me; I’m
dead?” He looked questioningly at the
short female, (she barely came up to his shoulder), standing before him with
her hands on her hips tapping her foot impatiently. “Let me guess…you’re the grim reaper?!? I always thought you’d be taller!” This earned him a hearty laugh.
“I’ve been called a lot
of things in my lifetime, but the grim reaper was never one of them! Actually I just work with the Angel of Death
or “grim reaper” if you like on special cases like yours…”
“Wait a minute!” Interrupted Adam, “what do you mean cases
like mine?!?”
She continued, slightly
perturbed at the interruption. “You’ve
been on his master arrival list and taken off it so many times, its now written in pencil!
There’s been a four member committee called to review your case to
decide if it’s time to keep you or not.”
Adam’s head was reeling
with this latest revaluation. “Do I get
to meet this committee? Don’t I have a
say in my future or…afterlife?”
“Ah
not yet. They’ll call when it’s
time to hear their decision…not before.”
Adam crossed his arms,
feet slightly spread and planted himself before the woman trying to be
intimidating as he looked down at her; (he was over a foot taller than she
was). It didn’t work. She crawled onto the chair beside him so she
could look him in the eye.
“Look!” She started, now nose to nose with him, a
very short finger wagging at him. “I
know you’re stubborn to the nth degree and just plain bull headed but…guess
what?!? I wasn’t chosen for this
assignment for my good looks! I spent
ten years working with juvenile delinquents…I don’t intimidate! They told me exactly what I can and can not
tell you at this point and it adds up to not much! If and when they decide to keep you all will
be revealed by them…not me! Get
it?!? Got it?? GOOD!!!” With that she jumped to the floor
and looked up at his face. As hard as he
tried, he couldn’t keep a straight face.
“Do you have a
name?” He laughed, looking down at her
again.
A smile crept across her
face. “one of
my past cases once called me a bull headed tree stump but…you can just call me
Mickey.”
“OK…Mickey…now what?”
“Well” she started “ can’t stay here, so I got permission to take you to my
home until they reach a decision. Whey
they’re ready, they’ll call.” She turned
to the dresser and dug out some clothes for Adam. She was hoping for something besides black
but…it was Adam…he had nothing else.
Adam was still a bit
confused. “I don’t get it; if you’re not the Angel of Death…what are
you?!? Am I dead or not?”
Mickey stood silently
by weighing her answer carefully.
“You’re not dead yet but you’re not far from it. Dr. Martin and your family think you
are. It’s a condition that slows your
heart rate to just a couple beats per minute and screws up all your vitals so
they don’t appear to be working. Where I
come from they have the technology to deal with it. Where we are now, the tech doesn’t exist. If they decide to send you back we’ll just
have to give it a little ‘jump start’.
As for what I am…” she thought for a moment. “I’m just a female from another place that
has the ability to cross the bands of time when necessary. I work with the Angel of Death (whose name really
is Andy by the way) on occasion to keep him from getting to far backlogged. Don’t ask for a more detailed explanation,
because it wouldn’t make sense. Now…if
that’s as clear as mud, lets get this rock a rollin’ and get out of here.” With that she turned to head out the door, a
rather disoriented Adam close behind.
“When this committee
concludes its business, how will you know?”
“They’ll call me.”
“How? Mystical air waves?” He asked trying to be sarcastic.
“Sort
of.” Mickey giggled as she pulled
a small device from her back pocket and showed it to him. “Cell phone”.
By now they were
standing before the house. Everything
looked normal to Adam but it had a gray tinge to it. Mickey grasped his hand, “Ready?”
“For
what?” Mickey snapped her
fingers. Except for the gray tinge,
everything appeared the same to except; where the bunk house was supposed to be
sat a funny looking machine with hugh,
rotating blades attached to the top!
“Where are…?” he asked
his gaze moving from the house to the helicopter.
Mickey tried to explain,
“It’s not so much where as when. We’re a
few years in the future.”
With that Adam’s head
snapped around to face his companion.
“What year is this?”
“2008”
“Two
THOUSAND eight?!?” This was
almost to much for him. He laid a hand on the corral fence to steady
himself as he regained his composure.
Mickey laid a
reassuring hand on his shoulder before she spoke again. “It gets better ducky…” she said doing her
best Widow Hawkins impersonation. “You
know that thing you’ve been staring at?
We’re going to crawl inside it and fly out of the state before you get
too much of a glimpse of future
“Where are we
going?” Asked Adam as
he straightened and headed for the chopper with a determined step. He was intrigued to see how this thing
worked.
“
“I thought you said
this committee thing wasn’t going to take long…
Mickey chuckled
slightly. “This ain’t the 19th
century anymore sweetie. If we fly,
we’ll be home in about two hours.” Adam
was speechless. “Now…” continued Mickey,
“since it’s only about five minutes out of our way, if you promise to not ask
me to explain, we’ll fly over what’s left of
“What do you mean
‘what’s left’?” he asked distractedly as he studied the apparently big glass
bubble this stubborn little person was trying to convince him would fly.
Mickey spoke gently as
she laid a hand on his shoulder. “Remember
Adam…it was a ‘boom town’…the ‘boom’ ended and so did the town. Now!
Are you ready to fly?”
“Sure” he announced brightly the town all but forgotten as he
bounded for the chopper.
Mickey was taken aback
by his sudden change of heart. He
explained, “I’ve decided this is all a very vivid dream and anything’s possible
in a dream, even time travel!”
“Close enough!” muttered
Mickey. “This may turn into an easier
assignment than I thought.”
====
It took Mickey a few minutes
to get Adam strapped in the passenger seat and to explain the purpose of the
head set she placed over his ears. He
was really skeptical at first, but relaxed when he heard her voice through the
device.
“Remember, it’s all a
really weird dream!” she
smiled using his own words against him. “Ready to make like a bird?”
With that the chopper
blades began to move just above his head.
He watched, fascinated as they began to turn faster until he could no
longer see the movement. He felt a lurch
as they began to climb skyward.
Adam watched,
fascinated, as the world around them continued to drop further and further
down.
“By the way…” Mickey said as she manipulated the controls,
not looking in his direction. “Remember
that ‘infernal machine’ of Professor Pettibone’s that
Hoss wanted to invest in and you all pretty much told
him he was nuts?”
“Yes, what about it?”
he asked absently, trying to watch everything at the same time.
Mickey almost laughed;
he looked for the world like a small child at Christmas! “Look down.”
Was all she said. They had just flown over the highway leading
to
For the remainder of
the flight, he stared out before him. He
was still in shock. His hometown,
“Adam…yo…Adam, you still with me?” Finally broke through his befuddled
thoughts. He turned to find Mickey watching him out of
the corner of her eye, a smile on her face, and her hazel eyes dancing. “Almost home.” She said as she fished the phone out of her
pocket and handed it to him. He took it
gingerly, studying it. Mickey almost
laughed. “Push the little button on the
right and say the word ‘home’ into the top then hold it up to your ear. I want to see if my daughter’s home yet. If she is tell her
I’m picking up pizza on the way home.”
Adam did as instructed
and was genuinely surprised when he heard a female voice coming out of
something so small, especially when she knew his name.
“Ask her to call it in
for me and to order three this time.” He
did as instructed before returning the small device to her.
A thought suddenly
occurred to him. “What’s a pizza?”
“Something my daughter
would live on if I’d let her.” She
laughed. Conversation ceased as they
approached a heliport that seemed to appear out of no where.
“Now
what?” Adam asked anxiously as he
watched the earth coming up to meet them. His heart racing
after watching Mickey effortlessly land the craft. “Where are we?”
“
“What?!? You mean we’ve traveled over 2,000miles in
two hours?!? It took pa and me over 9 years!”
Mickey smiled. “You’ll find a lot of things have changed
since 1860. We’ve even been to other planets!” At his befuddled look she added with a gentle
hand on his arm, “Remember…you’re dreaming.
Besides, with your naturally inquisitive nature, you’re most likely
going to find it all, to quote one of my favorite TV characters…’fascinating’!”
After leading him to
the awaiting jeep, and making sure he was buckled in,
she said. “In the immortal words of my
daughter; ‘hang on duder, it’s goin’ a be a bumpy ride!” As the jeep jumped into traffic.
====
The days passed quickly
for Adam. He was so intrigued with
learning all this century had to offer; he had all but forgotten why he was
there.
Mickey and her
daughter, Robin, were more than happy to tell him almost anything he wanted to
know. He was fascinated by all the advancements that the women of the world
took for granted; lights that turned on at the tough of a button; a device that
kept the house cool when the temperature soured over 100 degrees; the house
itself (it was on wheels). What
fascinated him the most was the mail delivery. Instead of traveling for an hour once per
week…someone brought it to you on a daily basis! The list went on and on…microwaves, digital
photography, computers that connected you to the
world, television. The list went on and
on!
…Robin even taught him to drive the jeep! With almost nothing to worry about, he
learned to relax for the first time in his life. He was actually having a wonderful time!”
====
“Adam I have to go out
for a while. Robin’s home so don’t
wonder off by yourself OK?”
“Where you goin’ mom?” asked Robin as she and Adam finished cleaning
the breakfast dishes. Since neither she
nor Adam could cook, it fell to them to keep the kitchen clean.
She hesitated for a
moment, unsure if she should answer but decided to continue. “I got a call last night,
I have to check in with Andy.” The
concern was evident in Adam’s eyes.
Mickey changed the subject. “If
you two promise to behave while I’m gone, I’ll bring home dinner. Now; I know I’m going to regret this but…what
do you want for dinner?”
As one the answer
reverberated throughout the house “PIZZA!”
“Why did I ask?” She muttered as she picked her jeep keys from
the peg by the door. Robin kissed her on
the check as she prepared to leave “Thank you mommy…I love you!”
Adam, being in one of
his more playful moods kissed her other cheek.
“Thank you mommy, but I just like you a whole lot!”
“Oh shut up!” She grinned as she swatted him on the
shoulder. “Besides; you’re 175 years
old—I’M NOT YOUR MOMMY!” She could still
hear the sounds of their laughter as she started the jeep down the driveway.
====
When Mickey returned
that evening, she found a very subdued Adam sitting alone, watching TV.
“This is unusual!” She laughed, hanging her keys back on the
pegboard. “Find something interesting to
watch?” As she flopped on the corner of
the couch, she noticed the screen for the first time. He was watching an early episode of Bonanza.
“I think you owe me an
explanation.” He said quietly, his eyes
never leaving the screen. He was staring
at a close up of his father, a look of homesickness in his eyes.
Mickey sighed. “You’re right. I was hoping to avoid this but…” she halted
as she made her way to the fridge to get him a beer and a soft drink for
herself before she started.
“OK” she began. “Before I was born your family’s case worker
tried to sell the idea of making your family’s history into a TV series to his
supervisor. Since this would have been a
total and complete breech of the confidentiality clause of our rules and
regulations, he of course said no. It
was only after several heated arguments that it was discovered he had already
done it. He was taken before the review
board and sentenced to live out the remainder of his life as a mortal. He was stripped of his powers and all
memories of A.N.D.Y. were erased. That
was when I took over your case.”
Adam was stunned. “When did all this happen and why is that…”
he pointed to the screen “so accurate.
Those people even look like us!”
“It is accurate up to a point.” Mickey explained, “The agent was only able to
transfer six years of records before he was discovered. On the series, the actor that portrayed you
left after six seasons. From there, the
story line is pretty much all in the minds of the writers.”
“Well, who was this ex
case worker? Is he still around? Can I see him?”
“David Dortort, yes he’s still alive, and no you
can’t.”
“Why
not?”
“Because
he wouldn’t remember you. He’d be
really surprised to have Pernell Roberts walk in
looking like he did on the series when he’s now 79 years old! Besides, the panel has requested a meeting
with you tomorrow. Your case is almost
settled.”
“That
soon?” He looked a little
apprehensive.
“Adam…You’ve been here
almost six months. Besides, I have a
feeling you’ll enjoy it.”
“What about…?” he
didn’t finish the question, only pointed at the TV.
“That by dear is a very
popular western that first went on the air almost 50 years ago, and has been in
reruns for 33 years. Matter of fact, the
actor that played you is the only one of the family still living.”
“How
come they look so much like us?!?”
He was very perplexed.
Mickey laughed “That
dear boy even I can’t explain! Now, get some
sleep, you’ve got a massively long day tomorrow.”
“Am I coming back?”
“That will be decided
one way or the other tomorrow.”
“Can I at least tell
Robin goodbye?”
“No need…she’s coming
with us.”
====
“I’m driving!” Yelled Robin as she snagged
the jeep keys on the way out the door.
“I don’t think so!”
said Mickey taking the keys out of her hand.
“Do you believe this
Adam?!? She taught me to drive, but she
won’t ride with me! Do you see a problem
here?!?” She complained good-naturedly.
“Considering I’ve seen
you drive…not really!” He quipped.
Mickey listened to the
verbal exchange quietly. ‘In the last
few months, he’s learned to relax and enjoy life…MAN I’m going to miss
him!’ Aloud she stated “Actually I had
something else in mind.” Turning to
Adam, “do you remember the way to the heliport?”
“I think so; why?”
“Good” she said as she
tossed him the keys. “You drive.”
Adam stood staring at
the keys, his mouth agape then back to Mickey.
“If you don’t want to…”
she started, playfully reaching for the keys.
He snatched his hand away.
“Nope”
before jumping in the driver’s seat.
Once at the airport, he
attempted to talk her into letting him fly the chopper.
“I ain’t that
crazy!!!”
====
By the time Mickey set
the chopper down in the yard next to the ranch house, Adam’s eyes had lost
their ever-present mischievous twinkle that he had acquired over the past few
months.
“What’s wrong?” asked
Robin, noting the change in him.
“I never realized until
now just how homesick I was.”
“We’re getting
there! Let’s rock duder…it’s
time to meet the committee.” With that,
Robin grasped one hand and Mickey grasped the other. With a snap of the finger, the three of them
were instantly transported to…he couldn’t tell where. If he didn’t know any better, Adam surmised,
he thought they were walking on a cloud!
As they approached the
entrance, Mickey stopped.
“Robin and I will meet
you here in 48 hours. From this point,
you’ll have to go alone. Just walk
through that door and your escort will meet you there.”
He looked a little
nervous but he’d trusted her so far. He
stepped through the door into an area that looked just like the area he’d just
left except for the leather sofa setting off to the side. Perched on the end sat a woman wearing
clothing that looked vaguely familiar to him.
“Has it been that long
Mon Cheri?” Came
the all too familiar voice from the shadows.
“Marie?” He almost whispered. Adam’s analytical mind kicked in at that
moment. “Sorry ma’am” he apologized,
“you sounded very much like my step mother, but that’s impossible, she died
almost 20 years ago.”
The woman walked
closer, the light falling across her face.
“In that you are correct my wonderful son.” She reached forward, placing her hand on his
chin and pushing his mouth closed. “My
but you have grown to be the man you’re father always said you would be.” His arms shot forward to enfold her in a bear
hug, tears streaming down his face. “I’m
sorry.” He cried, as he clutched her to his chest. “I always knew if I grew to love you I would
loose you as well, and Joe would grow up without a mother.”
“My boy, my death
occurred because it was my time,” she consoled, pulling away far enough to look
into his tear stained face, “not because you loved me. No matter your feelings for me, it would have
happened anyway.” She lifted her hand to
wipe away a single tear as it made it’s way down his cheek.
“I always thought when
I died…,” he said, after regaining his composure.
“Ah but this is but the
first step on your journey.” Interrupted Marie not allowing
him to finish his thought. “I am your
welcoming committee since your memories of me are the most complete. Now, young man…follow
me.” She took his hand and continued to the next door that he hadn’t noticed
until now.
“Where are we now?” he
asked as they entered an area that was a bit less cloud filed than the last
room.
“You are further back
into your lifetime.” Came
a voice from the shadows he never thought to hear again. That beautiful, lilting accent…that voice…
He couldn’t breath “Mama?” Came
out in an almost whisper. He was afraid
to look, for fear it wasn’t her.
Inger
stepped out into the light. “Yes my
darling Adam, it is mama.” He felt as if
the years since her death had not happened, that he was a small child again as
he cleared the distance between them. He
seemed almost surprised that they were the same height. He reached almost hesitantly to touch her
face; afraid she wasn’t really there.
Her hand covered his, tears glistening in her cornflower blue eyes the
same color as Hoss’.
He swept her up into a bear hug that could rival Hoss!
“I kept Hoss safe for you mama just like I said I would.” He said into her hair. He didn’t want to let her go. “You should see how big he’s gotten! He’s bigger than Uncle Gunnar
and pa!” He laughed, finally putting her
down, but not releasing her.
“I know my
darling. We have watched you as you’ve
taken care of your brothers and father over the years. You’ve done a wonderful job. We couldn’t be prouder.” Marie joined the two of them, standing beside
Inger as if joining forces with her.
A look of confusion
creased Adam’s brow, “Wait
a minute…” he started. He pointed to
Marie; “If you’re here…” to Inger “and you’re here…”
he couldn’t continue the thought.
A soft, musical voice
drifted from the clouds behind him. “Yes
my darling, I’m here as well.” He was
almost afraid to turn around. He felt a
tiny hand on his shoulder as she turned him to face her. “My son, you don’t know how much I wanted to
be there with you and your father as you grew, but it just wasn’t meant to
be.” Tears clouded his eyes once again
as he stared into the face that had, until now, been behind a small pane of
glass sitting on his father’s desk. “I
also know of your belief that you killed me by being born.” She said as she stared up into his golden
eyes, made even brighter by the tears that continued to form there. He couldn’t speak, for fear of releasing
them. He only nodded, as his glaze
lowered to the floor. Liz wrapped her
arms around him and pulled his head down to her shoulder. “My darling, it was my time. If I hadn’t died giving birth to the most
wonderful son on the planet, it would have been in a traffic accident three days
later. Do you understand? You had nothing to do with it!”
His head remained on
her shoulder as he threw his arms around her, drinking in the softness of her
face, and the scent she wore. Finally,
he raised his head from where it’s resting place, “Pa was right,” he smiled, as
Liz brushed the remainder of his tears from his cheeks, “you do smell like wild
flowers.” It seemed as if the weight he
carried on his shoulders for so many years had finally been lifted. None of their deaths had been his fault. His love hadn’t killed them!
Adam turned to face the
three women; his arms still around his mother’s shoulders. He was afraid to release her for fear she
would disappear again. His heart was
finally full. He was looking into the
faces of the three women who meant more to him than any other in the world, and
they were all together.
“Are you all going with
me to see this committee as my support group?”
He asked. He couldn’t stop
smiling.
Liz spoke first,
“Actually Adam…we ARE the committee.”
Inger and Marie nodded. “We just
have to proceed to the final chamber to meet with the head of the committee to
discuss our findings and to tell you our final decision.” With that the small group made their way into
the final chamber.
Seated at the round
table waiting almost patiently was Abel Stoddard. “I thought you three were going to monopolize
all of my young grandson’s time while he’s here!” He smiled as he got to his feet. Adam couldn’t believe it. His grandfather displayed none of the
stiffness in his gait that he remembered from his days in college when he lived
with him. He seemed almost as spirited
as Little Joe did as he bound around the table to embrace him. Adam seemed even more mystified as he
returned the embrace.
“Are you part of this
committee as well grandfather?”
“That I am lad.” Said Abel as he and Adam
returned to the women. “We have
spent the last several months reviewing the lives of your family and of the
people in
“Adam…son…” Marie took
up the tale. “As much as we want you
here…” she turned away, tears in her eyes once again. She couldn’t go any farther.
“As much as the four of
us love you and want to keep you…” Inger tried, and
failed, joining Marie.
“Adam, Benjamin and
your brothers need you.”
“Mother, I don’t want
to go back! I want to stay here with all
of you! The family can go on without me,
they’ve done it before!” He sounded as
Joe when he was pleading to get his own way with Pa! “I’ve spent my entire life wanting to know
you and couldn’t; don’t ask me to give you up now…please…”
He knew he was being selfish, but he didn’t care anymore.
Abel placed his hands on
Adam’s shoulders and turned him to look him in the eye.
“Lad, how do you think your father survived loosing these
three? It was because you were there to
be his strength when he had none, even when your mother died. What do you think will become of him if he
looses you as well?” Adam began to
falter; he hadn’t thought of his father.
Abel continued, “come; we need you to see something.” He led the small group to what appeared to be
a small t.v. Monitor.
“Watch” he directed as the picture came to life, “and see just a small
portion of what we have seen.”
As Adam sat watching
the picture play out before him, his mothers and grandfather gathered around
him, each laying a hand on his shoulders and back in a show of support. They knew it would be difficult for him to
watch.
Several hours later:
Adam sat,
motionless. He couldn’t believe what he
had just witnessed! In a short span of
time, he watched as his beloved father collapsed at his funeral and have to be bedridden for months, almost as if he were
waiting to die as well.
He watched Hoss; his gentle giant of a little brother crawl into a
whiskey bottle and morph into a dangerous, belligerent drunk that spent more
time in Roy Coffee’s jail than at home where he belonged with his animals. It was as if the spirit had gone out of both
he and his father and they had given up on life and the dream that had been the
Ponderosa and were waiting for it to all end!
And Joe…his strong
willed, energetic, fun loving brother that would push him over the edge on a
regular basis just because he could was gone.
Physically he was still there,
working from sun up to sun down trying to hold
the ranch together and be strong for the rest of his family. He had taken over almost every aspect of the
daily operations, and spent long hours almost every night going through the
books.
‘He’s turned into me!’
thought Adam
In front of his family,
and the rest of the world, he shed no tears, showed no emotions but, when he
was alone, it was a different story. He
could usually be found sitting on the ridge by the lake, staring at the grave
markers of two people that he missed so much.
When his mother died, Adam had been there for him, comforting him and
holding him when his nightmares got so bad they woke him in the night
screaming. Over the years after her
death, the nightmares had stopped; until now.
Adam’s death had brought those dreams to the surface once again. Now, when he awoke each night, scared, tears
making tracks down his cheeks, there was no one there. His pillar…his rock…was gone forever.
‘I’ll make you proud of
me Adam.’ He would whisper each night to the family portrait sitting on his
nightstand.
Adam slowly became
aware of his family gathered around him.
Abel and Elizabeth sitting on either side of
him, each holding a hand and Marie and Inger standing
just behind him, a comforting hand on each shoulder, and each stroking his hair
and the back of his neck.
For the next few
moments, he watched as Hoss, his beloved younger brother, drowned trying to
save a small child who had fallen into the Truckee River, then watched as less
than a year later, Joe’s house burned to the ground with his very pregnant wife
still inside.
Marie leaned forward,
squeezing his shoulder as she spoke softly into his ear. “Do you see now why you have to go back
son? Benjamin and Joseph are about to
lose so much more. You’ve always been
the anchor that’s held the two of them together. If they loose you as well, they will never
recover.”
“As much as I want to
keep you here with me,”
“Will I remember any of
this?” he asked, his voice riddled with emotions as he looked at each of the
cherished faces surrounding him.
“No lad you won’t.”
said Abel. “You’ll remember it all as a
dream just as you told Mickey when you first came here. As for the future events you witnessed, that
you won’t remember at all because it would reek havoc
on the future.”
They were interrupted
by a knock on the door. “Are you ready
for me?” Asked Mickey,
pocking her head just inside the door.
“You said 48 hours.” Exclaimed Adam, wiping the tears from his cheeks.
“Sweetie…” she began
gently, “it’s been 52. Time moves a bit
differently on this side. I gave you a
few extra hours because I knew you won’t be seeing them again for quiet some
time.”
“You knew I was going
back all along didn’t you?” he asked suspiciously.
She just nodded.
Moving before Adam and
placing his hands gently on his shoulders, Abel said “It’s time to say goodbye
lad. It’s time to go home where you
belong.”
Adam threw his arms
around his grandfather, holding him close.
“I miss you grandpa. I always
wished you returned to
“Me
too son, me too. Now… say goodbye
to your mother x 3 and get going.” He
pushed Adam in the direction of Marie.
“I’m sorry I was such a
beast to you when you and pa first got married.” He said, hugging her close.
“I always understood,
even then.” She said, returning the
embrace. “Just remember, I always loved
you, even when you were a handful.”
To Inger,
“You don’t know how bad I missed you mama.”
“And
I you son. I love you.”
And then, there was
only
“I don’t want to leave
you.” He said pulling her into his arms
for a final embrace. She took his face
in her hands and placed a gentle kiss on his cheek.
“I’ll be waiting for
your return. Take care of Benjamin for
me. I love you son, more than you will
ever know.”
“I hate to do this,” came a guiet voice behind them,
“but we still have to get back to
The analytical side of
Adam resurfaced. “I don’t
understand. I’ve been dead and buried
almost six months now, bringing me back to life is physically impossible.”
Mickey laughed. “Dude, if you want to get technical, at this
point in time, you’ve been dead for about 146 years! I told you earlier,
don’t ask me to explain it all to you because it’ll only confuse…well…ME. I don’t understand how it all works either
but, you’re going back to almost the exact time when you “died”. Now, we have to pick up Robin from the mall
before she melts my credit card!” She
said trying to lighten the somber mood.
“Then we’re off to
Her curiosity getting
the better of her, Inger had to ask, “What’s at
Mickey grinned, the mischievous side of her emerging. “Something that’s
guaranteed to get his motor running again. The Sport’s Illustrated swim suit edition
photo shoot!”
A soft chuckle could be
heard behind him. Able understood, even
if the women looked confused. “That’ll
do it laddie, that’ll do it!”
Adam looked confused but she hadn’t steered him wrong yet, so he
followed her out the door, a last lingering look at his heaven bound family.
“I’ll be waiting when
you return.”
Abel laid his hand on
Adam’s shoulder before speaking. “Go lad
before she changes her mind and keeps you here!” He quipped trying to lighten the mood. They watched as he followed Mickey out the
final door.
=================
“Pa, can you hear
me?”
‘That voice sounds insistent…I
wonder who they’re talking to?’ thought Ben as he sat, continuing to hold
Adam’s hand while staring at his face, so relaxed, so young looking, so at
peace. He could still see a lot of Liz
in her son’s handsome and extremely masculine face.
“Pa, please…” the voice
said again, causing Ben to turn slowly toward the voice. He looked into the tear-streaked faces of his
two youngest sons, his two remaining sons.
Hoss gently placed his massive hands on Ben’s upper arms and attempted
to lift him from the chair where he had been sitting, holding his big brother’s
hand since they had all watched the life drain out of him. Ben had watched his son die, but his heart
refused to accept what his mind knew; that he was gone. With the help of his first born, he had
survived the deaths of all three of his wives…how was he supposed to survive
the death of his first born? He knew he
still had two other sons that needed him, but how…?!? He leaned forward and brushed a stray curl
off the boy’s brow, resting his hand on the top of his head. It was a gesture he knew Adam hated but, he
indulged in when he could get away with it.
As he stood, he leaned forward and placed a kiss on his son’s forehead
before looking to the picture of his first wife, smiling back at him from the
small bedside table.
‘She looks as if she knows he’s coming to be with her.’ He thought
to himself. Aloud, he said in an almost
whispered voice:
“Take care of our baby
Liz. I guess he’s all yours now.” As he turned to leave the
room. A fresh flood of tears
streamed down the cheeks of his other two sons as they heard his almost
whispered acceptance that their beloved elder brother, their protector, and
their mentor was finally going to get to be with his mother.
===========
Only Joe remained in
Adam’s room. His father had been taken
to his room and given a sedative to calm him somewhat so he could get some
semblance of rest. He had been with Adam
since his illness began almost two weeks ago, only dozing in the overstuffed
chair when he could no longer keep his eyes open. It had taken Dr. Martin, Hoss,
Joe, and Hop Sing all to get him to release his Adam’s lifeless body, and to
accept that he was truly gone. Hoss remained with his father after Joe requested some time
alone with Adam to say goodbye. He knew
Hop Sing was waiting to clean Adam’s body and prepare it for the trip to the
undertaker, but he just couldn’t face it; not yet. His mind continued to tell him that this was
only his beloved brother’s shell…that he was no longer in there, but his heart
said otherwise.
He didn’t know where to start.
As he sat, staring at his brother’s finally peaceful face; all the
feelings that had remained locked inside of him over the years concerning Adam
started to trickle out.
“Adam, what am I going
to do now?” he started. “You’ve always
been there to keep me from going over the edge…been my base…my anchor…and no
matter what, even when I’ve been so mad at you I could scream…I’ve always,
ALWAYS loved you.”
A small smile crossed
his face. “I never told you big brother
but, all those times you stopped me from doing what I wanted and I wanted to
hit you I was so mad? After I calmed down,
I could see your side of things, and agreed with you. There was no way I would have told you at the
time!!!
Remember when you went
away to college and I begged you not to leave me and told you I hated you for
leaving?!? I tried to hide in your
luggage and go with you, but pa found me!
Did he tell you?”
Joe’s one sided
conversation continued on for several minutes as he poured out his heart and
soul to the brother he would soon have to watch go to his final reward and
would have to rely on memories to keep him going. The tears came again as he laid his head on the
bed beside Adam’s hand; he just couldn’t seem to stop.
“I love you big
brother. I know I didn’t say it enough
but…I love you…I’ll always love you!
I’ll take care of Pa and Hoss just like you would Adam…I’ll make you
proud of me.” Joe laid his head on
Adam’s chest and wrapped his arms around his midsection. He failed to notice the faint beating below
his ear. He barely felt a hand weakly
caress his hair as he continued to hold his brother’s body
close. ‘It’s almost like he was
still in the room with me.’ He thought.
“I’ve…always…been…p
proud…of…yyou…little bu…little buddy.”
He heard whispered on the wind.
Joe raised
slowly from his position, wiping the tears away as he went. “Guess I should give Hoss his time to say
goodbye.” He said as he took one last
look at Adam. He still couldn’t believe
his beloved big brother was gone. His
heart refused to accept what was right in front of him.
A sob caught in Joe’s
throat when he looked into Adam’s face. His
eyes remained closed but they were moving as if he were asleep and dreaming!
“PA! HOSS!
DOC! SOMEBODY HELP!!!” He screamed.
Even with the door closed, the sound reverberated through the
house. Later, Joe would report that it
sounded like a stamped had been routed up stairs! Hoss literally took the door off the hinges
as he burst into the room closely followed by Dr. Martin; who was on his way
out the door after completing Adam’s death certificate.
“Joe, what’s
wrong?” Questioned Hoss as he stood the door against the wall. Joe’s eyes never left Adam’s as the tears
continued to stream down his face. Not
trusting his voice, all he could do was point to his big brother. Hoss turned a questioning look toward where
Joe was pointing, noticing Adam’s eyes for the first time.
Hoss turned quickly to
find Dr. Martin on his heels. “Boys,
what’s…? Oh My goodness…Hoss grab my bag…” he started as he ran quickly to the bed. “Never mind!” He yelled as he tossed the blanket off Adam
and ripped open his nightshirt. He laid
his ear directly over Adam’s heart, his eyes widening as he detected a faint
heartbeat. His eyes shone with unshed
tears as he turned to the brothers anxiously waiting at the foot of the
bed. “Boys, I don’t know how, and I
don’t know why but…you’re brother’s alive! It’s a miracle!”
Hoss
clinging tightly to Joe to keep him on his feet asked as he wiped the tears
from his face and sniffed loudly, “Shouldn’t we wake pa up?”
“He’s heavily
sedated. He’ll be asleep for several
more hours.” Doc said as he retrieved
the now useless death certificate. He
smiled broadly as he looked at Hoss and Joe.
“Which of you would like to make confetti out of this thing?” The boys grin at each other as they each make
a grab for the paper.
======
Several hours later, as
evening approached, Ben found himself once again in Adam’s room. His mind worked back over the past few
hours.
He still couldn’t
believe it. After the sedative had worn
off, he awoke to the realization that his world had changed completely. His son was gone. He knew he still had two sons but, he never
felt so alone. He and Adam had been
through so much together, but now, he had to face the rest of the world alone.
He was a bit surprised
to find Dr. Paul sitting by his bedside, a broad grin on his face. Why was he so happy, his
son was dead! Didn’t he have any
feeling?
“Bout time you woke up
Ben.” Started Dr.
Martin. “I have something for you
to see.” He started, getting to his feet
and reaching for Ben’s hand.
“Why?” Ben stated, “You have nothing that could make
me care anymore.”
“Indulge me.”
The two of them made
their way down the hallway, back to Adam’s room. He knew he had to do it but, he was dreading
reentering. He stopped short at the
doorway. His eyes were playing tricks on
him! The boys were sitting on either
side of their brother’s bed, holding his hands but…Adam was looking at
him! He wasn’t dead after all! It was a miracle, pure and simple. Paul caught him as his legs refused to
support him any longer. His gaze
wondered to the small portrait of
EPILOG
Almost a month had
passed. Adam, spending his first full day
out of bed, sat quietly in the rocker on the front porch, enjoying the feel of
the sun on his face. He was so lost in
thought, remembering his dream that he failed to hear his father’s approach. The book he was pretending to read lying on
his lap.
“Penny for your thoughts…” Ben said,
sitting on the bench in front of his son.
He found himself, once again staring at the young man before him. On an almost hourly basis over the past
month, he found himself sending his thanks heavenward to his maker and to his
first wife for sending his son back to him.
“Sorry pa, guess I was
just lost in thought again.”
“What were you thinking
about?”
“The dream I had
when…well…when you thought I was dead. I
was almost 150 years in the future. You
wouldn’t believe some of the stuff I saw.”
Adam smiled as he thought back.
“I even flew!”
A smile creased Ben’s
face as his son recounted all that happened in his dreams. “Where did you stay for all of those months?”
“With
our A.N.D.Y. case worker.” A soft
chuckle erupted from Adam. “The Bull
Headed tree stump”.
The color drained from
Ben’s face, and his smile disappeared.
“You mean Mickey don’t you?” He
asked so softly, Adam barely heard him.
Ben continued, his mind returning to the days of his youth. “She told you a former client gave her that
name? That was me. All these years I thought it was a dream…”
“You mean I finally got
to meet my…that was really my…” His voice trailed off, he couldn’t finish the
thought. He had finally accomplished his
dream and met his mother. He couldn’t
tell
Ben got slowly to his
feet. “I have to a, check with Hop Sing
about dinner.” His eyes wondered from
his son’s bewildered face to the book lying in his lap. He noticed something sticking out of the
upper edge. “What’s this?” He asked, pulling it from between the
pages.
“I don’t know, I’ve never seen it before.”
Ben sat heavily back on
the bench as his knees refused to support him any longer.
“What is it pa?” Adam asked in concern, taking the paper from
his father’s hands. The note read After all the two of you’ve been through, this is
the least I can do. Just remember that
this can be seen by absolutely no one, including Hoss and Joe.
It was signed, Take
care…Mickey.
On the other side was a picture of Adam at the monitor with his
mother on one side, his grandfather on the other, and Marie and Inger behind
him.
Ben carried that
picture with him in his vest pocket until the day he died. After his funeral, a sealed envelope
addressed to Adam was found among his private papers, attached to his
will. Adam never revealed to his
brothers what was inside.