Now Little Joe just how in tarnation did ya get way up
there? And
you want me to do what?"
Hoss said as he looked up into the tall tree where Joe was perched
on a
branch.
"Just chop the dad blamed tree down Hoss. I can't explain now
how I
got up here. Just get me out of it." Joe said as he clung to the tree
trying not to look down. He hated heights and didn't realize just
how far
he had climbed until it was too late.
"I aint cuttin' nothin' until you tell me just what got you up
there!" Hoss put the double bit ax head on the ground and leaned
against
it. "I got all day and nothin else to do but bide my time."
"Now Hoss.... Just take that big old ax there and start
chopping, I
really need down outta here."
Joe said ignoring Hoss question about how he got up there.
Hoss figured it had to be something good to get Joe that high up
in
a tree. "I think I could use a little nap while you decide when your
gonna tell me.." Hoss laid down by his ax and closed his eyes.
"HOSS that aint funny!" Joe squeaked, he was afraid Hoss would
let
him rot up there. "Please Hoss...it don't matter how I got up
here.
Just
get me down."Little Joe begged.
Hoss raised his head from his prone position. "Well I could use a
good bedtime story." and he laid back down and grinned. "I'm
waitin' Joe
anytime"
Joe grimaced. He knew when he was licked. "Well make yourself
comfortable and oh I see you are comfortable.
"I can't wait to hear this little brother." Adam had came up
behind
them, he tilted his Stetson back on his head to get a better
look. "It has to be mighty good to get you that far up in a tree.
It's
quite a way from the ground to that first branch your sitting
on."
Adam
observed mildly as he squatted down looking up into the tree.
"Oh no!!" Joe groaned inwardly. Now he would be at both of his
brothers mercy, never letting him live this down.
Joe carefully sat on the branch... "I promise to tell you both
but
you gotta promise it wont go no further than the family you hear?"
" I promise Joe," Hoss made a motion of crossing his heart.
"It must be above average for one of your pranks gone wrong Joe,
do
tell." Adam said as he got more comfortable.
"Well ya aint gonna believe this,"Joe started." I seen
this cute
little monkey and I thought it would make a unique gift to give
Pa for
his birthday..." Joe shook his head miserably as he went on.
"I got to
chasing that little monkey. He stopped and look at me as if
to say,
"Is
that all the faster you can run?" So I threw my hat at him and he
grabbed
it and ran off. Then I thought if I nose dived for him, I could
catch
him. All that got me was a nose full of dust as I started
sneezing. The
monkey started laughing at me. I was more
determined to get him as he stood there challenging me...
Hoss laughed, "You? Challenged by a little bitty monkey?" .
Shut up Hoss!"Joe glared at him. You gonna laugh or hear what got
me up here.
"Let him finish this Hoss,"Adam chided gently, "Please go
on,
Little Joe, the suspense is killing us." Adam said smirking.
Well, I kept chasing him until he rounded a boulder. .
. and
there was a baby bear. I froze in my tracks, and that stupid
monkey ran
right up to the cub and smacked it on the nose. I guess it scared
it, and
it started bawling. I turned around and there was the momma
bear
standing not a hundred feet from me." Joe paused not sure how to
go
on.
"That's not funny Joe, y
ou could have been seriously injured." Adam
said thinking how close his brother came to being hurt.
"I know that!" Joe said a bit defensive." I
started running and
that crazy monkey ran right up my back and clung to my neck. Well I
didn't give much thought about catching or tossing the monkey. I
found myself up here in this tree, and the scrawny monkey
abandoned me,
scooting on up into the branches and then started throwing pine
cones at
the bear
" I bet he wanted to show that mama bear where dinner could be
found."Adam chuckled.
Little Joe just glared.
Hoss was rolling on the ground roaring with laughter. "Hee
hee,
little brother haa haa, that is the funniest danged thing I ever
did
hear.".
"Are you sure you weren't trying to bring Pa home a bear
rug?
Using that monkey for bait?." Adam snickered.
"Maybe the mama bear wanted to take Joe home for a rug for
her
family." Hoss tried not to laugh, he failed.
"Shut up you two... or you wont hear the rest." Joe glared not
joining them in their hilarity.
"Okay Hoss, we better let him tell us the rest, it's obvious he
isn't finished yet." Adam tried to hide his grin.
Hoss turned his back on Joe as his shoulders heaved in
suppressed
laughter.
Joe decided to ignore Hoss and Adam just get his story over
with. " I climbed higher and higher to get away from that bear,
when I
finally thought I was higher than she could claw at me. I looked
down and
there was a big old cougar laying on a lower branch,
watching the monkey... or me. I wasn't sure which. I wasn't
taking
any
chances as I climbed further up the tree. I didn't realize how
far up the
tree I had gone, until here I am."Joe ended on a sad note.
Hoss laid back on the ground shaking with laughter."You were
chased
by a bear?" Hoss choked out the words thru bursts of laughter.
Adam bent over with his hands on his knees laughing until tears
rolled down his cheeks.
"Don't forget about the monkey... that monkey could have done some
serious damage."Adam sputtered out.
Joe glared at them both thinking snakes and spiders in their beds
would be too good for them.
"Oh wait Hoss." Adam held up his hand. "We never learned
what he
did with the cougar. Do finish this most entertaining tale." Adam
tried
not to laugh as he looked back up in the tree at Joe clinging to
it like
a life line.
"Well, I realized I had to do something, so I pitched the monkey
at
it and scared him away." Joe was tired of their laughter at his
expense.
"Ah Joe..." Hoss sobered up.'You didn't do that to the lil
feller
did ya?" Hoss half afraid he wasn't teasing.
"Serve ya right if I did." Joe looked away as if he was finished
with the story.
Hoss sat up. "Come on Joe, what did happen?"
Adam stopped laughing long enough to enquire. "Yes please do
finish
your story so we can get you out of the tree. I'm getting
famished, and
Hoss is getting delicate looking from lack of food."
Hoss stood up at the mention of food. "Yeah Joe, you gonna get
this
tale told so's we can get ya outta there, or do we need to come back
after supper?". Hoss started licking his lips. He forgot about Joe
as the
lure of food was stronger.
"Hold on Hoss." Adam stopped him with a gentle tug on his arm. "
Let him
finish this and we can all go eat."
Joe looked down on them wishing he could just sprout wings
and
fly. He knew that wasn't possible, so he continued on."There I
sat,
with
a monkey above me just out of reach and a cougar below me all but
tying
on his bib to have me for dinner. Then, I remembered
reading in one of my dime novels to sing if you get caught in a
situation like this. So I started singing and the monkey started
chattering.
"Was he was joining or protesting?" Hoss had to ask
guffawing at
his own joke.
Adam snickered some more.
Joe glared at him as he continued, "The cougar got up and scared
the snot out of me as it looked up at us. I thought I was a
gonner.
Then suddenly it turned and jumped out of the tree and loped
away."
Joe
ended looking miserable.
"That's a great story, Joe." Hoss was still laughing. As he
got to
his feet and swung the ax over his shoulder and started chopping,
jolting
Little Joe from the tips of his toes to the ends of his dark
curls.
"Hold it Hoss...you're gonna knock me out of this tree." Joe
said
as the ax bit into the wood a second time rattling Joe's teeth
together, loosening his grip on the tree. Joe felt himself
falling thru
the air.
Adam watched as Joe slipped and fell, he rushed to try and catch
him hollering "NO JOE NO" the laughter stripped from Adam as he
thought
he was going to watch his youngest brother be killed before his
eyes.
Hoss looked up in time to toss the ax aside and try to catch Joe.
He missed, catching him by one leg, barely keeping Joe from
banging his
head on the ground.
"Little Joe, that aint no way to get out of the tree. Ya could
have
waited until I got it cut all the way down. You didn't have to
try and
fly." It happened so fast Hoss didn't have time for it to
sink
in Joe
could have been killed.
"Shut Up Hoss!" Little Joe stormed. "And let me go! The
bloods
rushing to my head!" Joe tried squirming to get free.
Adam chuckled when he realized Little Joe was okay. "Why did you
put your self through all that if you knew you could get down on your
own? Of course, I wouldn't recommend that again unless Hoss is
here to
catch you." Adam grinned glad his brother was okay. He patted him
on
the
back after Hoss set him upright."
" Telling Pa about the monkey that got away is going to rate
right
up there with some of your fishin' yarns you tell us Little Joe."
Hoss
slapped him on the back knocking him a few feet forward.
Can't we just forget telling Pa this time? Huh?" Little Joe said
in
a pained voice.
"Not on your life little brother, not on your life. " Adam
grinned.
Yeah, Little Joe, I think Pa will enjoy this story as much as we
did." Hoss agreed as they walked companionably back to the house.
The End
By Nicki