The Asylum (Conclusion)

By: Sherri

January 2002

Hearing footsteps on the staircase, Ben lifted his head as he looked up from his desk. Laying aside his papers he watched as his youngest son slowly stepped down the staircase. Taking the opportunity to observe his son unseen, he noted that a thin covering of dirt layered his body while splatters of mud made up the rest of his outfit, compliments from his day of hauling timber. Over one shoulder he had slung a towel, while he held clean clothes in his other hand, causing Ben to guess that Joe was headed outdoors again to bathe in the creek. Once Joe’s physical injuries had healed from the asylum, he had refused to take a bath indoors, saying that he preferred the freedom of the creek, where no tub could constrict him. Watching as he made it down the last of the steps, Ben greeted his son, “Evening Joe.”

Faltering briefly mid-step, Joe looked over and saw Ben sitting at his desk, “Oh evening, pa.” Taking the last step down the stairs, he took a step on the wooden floor as he added, “I didn’t know you were around.”

“I’m here,” his father replied, as he moved from the desk to approach Joe. “If you are going out to bathe, why don’t you have Hop Sing heat you up some water instead?”

Shuddering briefly, Joe shook his head as he moved away from the older man and headed for the door, “Uh, no thanks pa. I’m fine down at the creek, the water’s not that cold.”

Watching as Joe pulled the door open and walked outside, Ben followed behind him watching as his son took the trail behind the house. Turning back inside Ben closed the door behind him, leaning against it for a moment. Shaking his head, he wondered if he was doing the right thing, by letting Joe ignore what had gone on at the asylum. The experience had been traumatic, and it still affected him, months afterward, subtle as it might seem to Joe. Just as Ben moved from the door to return to his desk, he heard the door swing open and saw the doorframe filled with the body of his middle son.

“Hey pa,” greeted Hoss, when he saw Ben standing near the grandfather clock. Shrugging off his coat, he tossed it over to the chair as he briskly rubbed his hands together trying to warm them up. “It’s getting cold out there. Mind if I light a fire?”

“Go ahead.” Ben answered, as he turned to watch his middle son grab a bulk of kindling, tossing it into the fireplace. “I didn’t notice the chill, but then again I haven’t been outside much today, just moving around indoors.”

“I wouldn’t be surprised if we had our first frost some time this week. By the way,” Hoss continued, “Adam and me got that fencing up on the back pasture, and we should be ready to move the cattle out onto the range.”

Nodding, Ben listened to Hoss talk as the door opened a second time, this time being pushed open by his eldest son. Dressed from head to toe in black, he could tell that Adam was chilled by the way he was hunched over at the door. As he slammed the door shut behind him, Ben could feel a wave of cold air slide past him while he watched as Adam tossed his hat on the rack. Leaving his coat on, he then unbuckled his gun belt and placed it on the sideboard before moving over to the fireplace. Seeing Ben across the room, he echoed Hoss’s sentiments as he spoke, “It is turning cold outside, pa. I bet we’ll get our first frost soon.” Putting his hands directly over the burning kindling, he moved aside as Hoss reached over and grabbed a log before heaving it into the fireplace. Feeling a little warmer, he turned around noticing that his younger brother wasn’t around, “Where’s Joe?”

“Taking a bath,” Ben replied, as he settled himself down in his armchair.

“Oh good, so he’s inside,” replied Adam, as he turned around to face the fire.

“Well, no,” Ben answered, a bit concerned with Adam’s reply. “He went outside to the creek, he didn’t want Hop Sing fixing up a bath.”

“OUTSIDE!” Adam exclaimed, as he turned around to face Ben. “Pa, it is getting cold out there, and you know for Hoss to volunteer to start a fire, it must be quite chilly.”

“What was I supposed to do son? Hold him down and demand that he take a bath inside?” questioned Ben. “No, I figure if it gets too cold, common sense will sink in and he will stay inside and bathe.”

“We’re talking about Joe here, pa,” replied Adam, as he rubbed his neck in frustration, “when has he showed common sense?”

Dropping another log of wood into the fire, Hoss swung his gaze towards his brother as he stood up for Joe, “Adam that was uncalled for. You know he’s just bothered with the stuff that happened to him there.”

Tossing his hands up in the air, Adam answered, “And when do you think it will go away? By ignoring it, or by getting him to talk about it?”

“And what do you want me to talk about?” Turning around, the men saw the soggy appearance of the youngest member of the family. Having slipped in through the back door of the kitchen, he had only a pair of woolen socks on his feet, which allowed him to quietly make his appearance into the room. His pants clung to his legs, while the lightweight shirt that he had thrown on while outside, hung unbuttoned against his bare chest. With it clinging to his skin the chill bumps on his chest announced to all those who could see that he was chilled. His wet hair dropped ice-cold droplets of water down across Joe’s face, before sliding down onto his already damp shirt. As he stood there shivering slightly in the dining room, Joe could feel the warmth of the fire reaching him from where he stood, beckoning him to step closer to it. But at the moment, he was so irritated about being talked about that his stubbornness showed its ugly head when he refused to walk near the fire. Shaking his head, he could feel the cold splatters of water sprinkle down around him as he continued, “I’m here, so talk to me.”

“Joe,” Adam began, “we’re only worried about you. You refuse to talk about what happened out there. It’s been three weeks, and well, we’re just worried.”

Standing there, Joe wanted to believe that they cared, but once his leg healed up and he was able to move about they didn’t seem to want to listen. Why now suddenly did they want to talk about it? Shoot, he wasn’t really sure he even wanted to talk about it. Just ignoring it was working for him. After nightmares the first week, he hadn’t been plagued by any of them again, which meant he was healed, right? Turning to face them, he could see the concerned faces of his family. Adam was standing by the fireplace, hovering and trying to get warm while Hoss patiently waited for him to get out of his way to throw another log on. Glancing over to his pa, Joe shrugged his shoulders. “I’m fine, honestly. I haven’t had a nightmare in weeks, so that should be enough proof that I’m okay,” Joe answered as he moved towards the staircase. Wanting to get out of their line of questions, he took the steps two at a time before disappearing down the hallway toward his room.

Watching as Joe disappeared from view the men in the living room could hear the sound of a door shutting upstairs before anyone downstairs spoke. “He doesn’t know, does he?” questioned Hoss, still looking up towards the staircase.

Shaking his head, Ben threw his hands up and turned around to face his sons, “That we’ve been giving him doses of sleeping medicine each night to prevent those nightmares? No he doesn’t know.”

Sitting down on the edge of the hearth, Adam thought for a moment. “You know pa, he may have a point there. Even he realizes that he has a problem when those nightmares appear, maybe it’s time for us to quit giving him the medication.”

“I’m not sure if that is wise, son.”

“What would it hurt? If anything, it might wake him up, literally,” Adam answered, as he looked over towards Hoss.

Nodding his head, Hoss reluctantly had to agree, “Unfortunately pa, I think Adam has a point there. Joe’s thinking he’s fine, because he ain’t had no nightmares.” Then turning to face Ben, he continued, “But what he doesn’t know, is that we’ve been making sure he doesn’t.”

Bringing his hands up to his face, Ben quietly rested his head in the cradle his hands made. Thinking it through, he had to agree that what his son’s were saying was making sense. Raising his head, he looked into Adam and Hoss’s faces before answering, “You’re right. We’ll stop it this evening.” Relief flooded Adam and Hoss’s faces, as Ben watched them release a big deep breath of air. Not quite finished with what he had to say, he continued, “You do realize, that these past few weeks of peaceful sleeping for us is about to end?”

Grinning, both men nodded. “Yes sir we do,” answered Hoss, “but if this is what it takes to heal Joe, I’m willing to try it.”

Nodding, Ben pulled himself from the chair and walked over to his desk, where he moved around some papers while thinking of his son. For weeks after Joe had returned home, he had awakened the entire household with his screams of terror as his dreams were invaded by his memories. After numerous sleepless nights, and Joe’s refusal to take any medication they had begun sneaking sleeping powder in Joe’s food, to help him and them rest better at night. Unfortunately, Ben realized that they had unwittingly proved to Joe that he was better, when in reality he wasn’t. Shaking his head, he sank down in his chair and began working on some correspondence while waiting for the call to dinner.

*******************

Plagued by the urge to run, Joe ran barefoot through the dark night stumbling on rocks that were digging into his feet, trying to outrun shadows that were chasing him. The only thought that seemed to go through his head was to run, run as fast as he could. But no matter how fast he ran it seemed like the shadows continued to chase him, as he could feel their heated breath beating down on his neck. Just when it seemed like he couldn’t run any farther, he saw his pa up ahead with his arms held out, beckoning Joe towards him, “hurry Joe, hurry!” Helped on by the sight, Joe kept his eyes on him, ignoring the stinging pain of a whip slicing across his back. Suddenly he could feel the sharp sting of the whip as it wrapped around his arms and legs, causing him to cry out just as he fell to the ground tripped up by the whip. Struggling in the bonds that held him down, Joe desperately looked around him, but couldn’t see his pa anywhere. Instead he found the shadows had finally caught up with him, and they now surrounded him. Varying shades of the shadows were grabbing at him and pulling at him, and twisting his legs together as he tried desperately to see who they were. With a jerk of his arms and legs, Joe tried to cry out as a faceless man hovered over him clamping his hand on his shoulder. Flailing out he grabbed hold of the hand, trying to twist it off his body when suddenly his eyes opened and with a gasp for breath he looked around him.

Silence.

Sitting straight up, Joe breathed heavily as he looked around him as the shadows faded away into the background. With a sigh, he realized as his eyes darted around the room that he was safe at home in his bed. His legs were tangled up in the bed sheets, while his hands were holding onto his pillow in a death grip. Feeling the sweat drip down his chest, he reached up and pulled off his damp nightshirt, tossing it to the floor as he kicked his legs loose from the sheets. Letting go of his pillow he sagged back on to the bed and looked up at the ceiling. There was no one in the room with him, just a cool breeze filtering in from the window as it pushed the curtains lightly in the window frame. As he blew out pent up air, Joe glanced over at the door and noticed that his door was closed. Hopefully it had blocked out any noise that came from his cries. How long he had been crying out, he didn’t know, but obviously not long enough to wake any one up again. Sliding his feet off the bed onto the cold wooden floor, Joe stood up and walked over to his water pitcher and poured a cup of water. Drinking some Joe tossed the rest of it over his head, as he leaned forward and looked into the mirror. Other than the dark bags under his eyes, he looked okay. Swallowing deeply, he shook his head. After so many weeks without nightmares, they had suddenly started up several nights before, making him realize that the ordeal he thought he had put behind him was still there, ready to taunt him again in his dreams.

Sighing, Joe moved over to the window and looked outside as memories as the asylum came flooding back. Shaking his head slightly he knew that just the idea of having a window in his room was a thrill compared to that place. Even though he had spent a few days there, the windowless room really got to him, especially when he couldn’t see the rising or setting of the sun. It was only when they were allowed outside was he able to guess the weather. Ever since he had arrived home, he had insisted on his window being opened, and became easily upset when he found the drapes pulled closed around his window. Just the idea of being closed up in his room had made him want to run screaming out of the room. Well, maybe not literally screaming, but the memories would come flooding back and personally, he would rather forget about them rather than deal with it. Unfortunately, this latest batch of nightmares brought it back to reality. Having been in the asylum, he knew that most of the people were in there for a reason, however he didn’t think they needed to be kept in such inhumane conditions. Lost in his thoughts, he leaned against the wall as looked over at his bed. He knew that this latest round of nightmares had shook his memory up and that it would be close to impossible to fall back to sleep. Walking towards his bed, he pulled his chair over to the window, then tugged the blanket off his bed and wrapped it around him. Settling down in the chair, he leaned his head on the windowsill as he looked out in the night sky.

Just as the sun was peeking across the horizon, Ben quickly dressed before quietly walking down the hallway to Joe’s room. Pushing the door open, he looked over at the bed and wasn’t too surprised not to see Joe there. For the past few mornings, Ben had found Joe curled up asleep in the chair by his bed, although this morning he was surprised to see that he was asleep with his head resting on the windowsill. Feeling the frosty breeze blowing in, Ben walked over to Joe and tried to shake him awake. “Joe, Joe, wake up.”

Slapping at the hand that was shaking him, Joe groaned in his sleep and tried to readjust his sleeping position, pulling the blanket tighter around his shoulders. Watching as Joe moved, Ben noticed that as the blanket slipped down a little off his shoulders, that his son was sleeping with no nightshirt on. Shaking his head, he thought of his son’s foolishness sleeping in a window with cold air with nothing but a blanket. Already realizing the struggle it was going to take to wake him up, Ben groaned. Hearing a noise behind him, he turned and saw Hoss walk into the room.

“Hey pa, having trouble waking sleeping beauty here?”

Nodding his head, Ben motioned for Hoss to come over as he moved away from Joe to make room for his son. “Your brother here decided to use the windowsill as his pillow last night, and slept with his head in the window. It is too chilly outside for him to sleep like this, especially since he is there with nothing on but his underpants.” Going over to the bed, Ben turned to Hoss, “Why don’t you bring him back over to the bed,” Ben suggested as he straightened the sheets on the bed. “I’ll let him catch a few more minutes of sleep before he has to get up.”

Leaning over, Hoss reached down tucking the blanket around his brother as he grabbed hold of Joe, putting his arms under his legs and his back as he lifted him up. Watching as Joe’s head limply fell back against his arms, Hoss cradling him in his arms, as he carefully carried him over to the bed and gently laid him down. Stepping back he watched as Ben covered him up with another blanket that had been dropped by the edge of the bed while Hoss moved over to the window to close it. Watching as Joe moved on his bed into a more comfortable position, Ben quietly motioned for Hoss to follow him out of the room. “Did you hear him last night?”

“No sir,” Hoss replied as he rubbed his eyes, “although the last few nights I did.”

“Hoss was probably exhausted from the previous nights when he went running to Joe’s room,” piped in Adam, as he appeared before them in the hallway, buttoning up his shirt. “I heard him cry out once, but then I didn’t hear anything else.”

Pulling the door closed behind him, Ben took one last look at his sleeping son before completely closing the door. “I don’t know how many more nights I can put up with these nightmares.”

“Well, we do still have several doses of sleeping medication leftover,” Adam answered, as he turned towards Ben. “Maybe you would like those?”

Shooting a glare at his son, he was about to take his words seriously until he realized that Adam was teasing. “Ha,” Ben replied, “Let’s get those chores done so we can be ready in time for breakfast.”

Following his sons down the stairs, Ben took one more glance towards the closed door before he rounded the corner and lost sight of the room.

********************

“Joe did you hear me?” Hoss hollered, as he watched his brother ride slowly down the trail. Riding together from the house, they were coming close to the point where they both would go their separate ways with their assigned duties. Watching as he pulled aside him, Hoss couldn’t help but notice a tinge of sadness that seemed to cover his face. But just as quickly as he saw it, the mask was in place as Hoss cleared his throat to ask, “Do you want to go into town tonight?”

“No.”

“But you haven’t been since you’ve been back, don’t you want to hang out over a the Silver Dollar? Some of your friends have been asking about you.”

“I said no! Tell them I’m busy.”

“Why don’t you tell them yourself?”

“Leave me alone, why don’t ya, leave me alone!” Kicking his horse in the ribs, Joe flew from Hoss’s presence and headed off to the job that his pa had assigned him earlier that morning.

“But Joe…” yelled Hoss. Shaking his head, Hoss was getting rather frustrated with the attitude that Joe exhibited lately, and if they thought he was bad before the sleeping pills, that was nothing compared to now. He was horrible. Muttering, Hoss couldn’t help but complain under his breath as he saw the dust fly up in the distance, “Fool kid.”

*******************

By mid-day, Adam returned from town, driving the buckboard loaded down with supplies and mail. Normally he would have hung around town a little longer and indulged in a beer at the saloon, but a letter from a friend in Boston had caught his attention. Intent on returning home, he didn’t remember much of the trip back to the ranch being as most of it was spent reading and rereading the letter. Mulling over it, he was vaguely aware when the horses pulled into the yard. Looking around him, he jumped off the buckboard, not even bothering to unload supplies in his search for Ben. “Pa, hey Pa! Where are you?” Just as his boots echoed across the porch, he could hear Ben’s voice coming from the side of the house.

“Adam?” he asked a bit concerned with the hollering, “What’s wrong?”

Retracing his steps Adam went over to where Ben stood and waved a paper, “Actually nothing is wrong, but I want to read you this letter I received from my friend Mark O’Conners from Boston.” Motioning towards the porch, Adam led the way as he sat down on a chair and unfolded the letter, “I had written him about Joe’s experience at the asylum down in Reno, and he was appalled that there were actually places like this still around. Here, let me read you part of what he said.”

Greetings Adam,

Thank you for the update about your family and life in Nevada, and your home on the Ponderosa. It sounds as though things are going very well for you. Things here in Boston…

“Wait a second, let me skip through all this and get to the part that is of interest,” Adam interrupted, as he skimmed through the letter. Nodding his head, he started reading once again.

I read with great interest about your youngest brother Little Joe’s experiences while at the asylum. There have been great strides made in cities in the East to prevent such a facility from taking ground. A distant cousin of mine, Dorthea Dix, has been hard at work trying to improve asylums and jails all over the country, in fact she has just returned from a trip to Europe. I hope you don’t mind, but a few days after I received your letter she came over and visited with me. Encouraged by the progress she has made so far, I felt compelled to read to her portions of your letter about Little Joe and the problems he encountered while at the asylum in Reno. My dear cousin became livid when she heard about your brother’s experience, and was determined to march out there at that moment and educate the institution. It was due to my encouragement to wait, that she has not arrived on your doorstop. However, she has asked for permission to visit you and this asylum. There is something she always tells me when she visits me, and that is, “In a world where there is so much to be done, I feel strongly impressed that there must be something for me to do.” Those are her words. I have to admit, I believe my cousin has found her mission.

Looking over at Ben, Adam put the letter down. “I heard about Dorthea when I was in college, and some of the things that she was trying to change. Before I attended college in Boston, she had already changed many of the jails in the area. She was disgusted by the conditions that people were living in, such as foul, unheated facilities. So she was determined to make a difference.” Adam continued, “She knew that improving the conditions that these people were living in, would not hurt them. Probably wouldn’t help their problems or the reason they were in there, but she knew that better conditions certainly wouldn’t harm them.”

Nodding, Ben crossed his arms as he looked over at Adam, “I wonder if Dorthea could help your brother.”

Puzzled, Adam turned his head as he looked over at Ben, “How can she help Joe? She’s more interested in changing prisons.”

“Exactly!” Ben forcefully answered, “If she can come out here and visit the Reno asylum, then maybe she could help relieve some of the guilt that Joe has from being in that place. I mean, he needs to believe that he was there for a purpose.”

Listening, Adam began to catch hold of what Ben was trying to say, “He may be more willing to let the horrible experience that he went through behind him, if there was something he could do to change the institution.” Patting Ben on the shoulder, he turned and headed back into the house, calling out, “That is an idea pa, a great idea. Let me go in and send a letter off to Mark.”

Later that afternoon, while riding the range to check on the progress his son’s were making, Ben rode towards the northern pasture wondering how Joe really was doing. For weeks his son had trouble sleeping, and even the suggestion of taking some sleeping medication threw Joe into a foul temper. He had to admit, he had been tempted to slip some sleeping powder in Joe’s food, but decided not to deceive his son. He had done it once, and it hadn’t helped him any. Now everyone on the ranch was tiptoeing around him, never quite sure what mood he was in. Thus, part of the reason Ben had sent each of his son’s in separate directions, especially Joe. He was on a work detail that required no help from anyone else. In a way, Ben had to admit he did it on purpose. The harder Joe worked, the more he ignored his problem, and it was usually on those days that his nightmares seemed to lessen. Yet, he was so tired that he usually ended up falling asleep as soon as he got home. Gone were the carefree moments of his youngest, in its place was a grimness that seemed to cast its spell over the rest of the family. As his mind wandered thinking of the nights and days they had been experiencing, he could see in the distance Joe’s horse, eating grass down by the bottom of a rocky hill. Riding forward, Ben pulled his horse to a stop and climbed off, leaving Buck there to eat with company. Looking around, Ben guessed that Joe must have climbed the hill and was sitting up there in solitude.

Sitting at the top of the ridge, Joe was deep in thought. The nights were getting worse and worse, and everyone seemed to be on edge around him. He didn’t like it, but he didn’t know what to do. Every time he thought he was over it, something would trigger a memory and he would do his hardest to try and bury it. Unfortunately, lately that meant he was snapping at everyone, and it ended up putting everyone on edge around him or else trying to avoid him. Just this morning, one of the new hands had made a large detour around him just to walk over to Hoss and ask a question. Since when did he become the bad one on the ranch? Dang it, the more he ignored his troubles, the more it seemed like they would taunt him. He was still taking his baths in the creek, although it was getting harder to do. Last night’s bath was cold, so cold that this morning he saw a thin layer of ice forming on the edges of the water when he left the house. Stifling a sneeze, he wiped at his nose while he sat on the edge of a rock as his feet precariously dangled over the edge, with a book in his lap. The night before, after a particularly traumatic nightmare he had tiptoed downstairs and pulled a book of poetry from the bookcase and began reading. One particular poem by William Wordsworth had caught his attention, and he was interested in reading it again this afternoon. Taking time to sneeze, Joe swallowed hard then wiped his nose once more, before he opened the book and the page he had folded back. Clearing his throat, Joe began to read out loud.

“Most melancholy at that time, O Friend!

Were my day thoughts, my nights were miserable;

Through months, through years, long after the last beat

Of those atrocities, the hour of sleep

To me came rarely charged with natural gifts,

Such ghastly visions had I of despair….”

Coming up the hill, Ben panted slightly out of breath, as he heard the voice of his son carry over him. Stopping in mid-step, he listened to the voice of his son, as the melancholy poem was being read, almost sobbing within his soul in a desire to help his son. Just as he topped the hill, he looked over and saw his son, clad in his green jacket sitting atop a rock with an unreadable expression on his face.

“Joe?”

Surprised at the sound of Ben’s voice, he jumped up as the book slide from his hands and dropped down onto the ground. “What are you doing following me up here?” Joe demanded.

“I… “

Interrupting Ben, Joe cried out, “Stop following me!” Pointing his finger at him he continued, “Why are you always sneaking up on me?” Embarrassed at being caught in such a vulnerable position, the thoughts that Joe had earlier flew away like leaves in the wind with his outburst. All sense of reason left him, as he made a motion to dash down the hill. Feeling a hand on his arm, Joe jerked around to see Ben holding on to him. “Let me go pa!”

“What is wrong Joe? You’ve been a bear these last few weeks,” Ben asked, concerned. “I’m only worried about you.”

Wavering between talking or staying quiet, Joe yanked his arm from Ben’s grasp. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

“When will you want to talk about it Joe?”

Pausing for a moment, Ben could almost hear the break in Joe’s voice, as he answered, “I don’t know.” But before he could comment any further, he watched as Joe turned from him and quickly moved down the hill. Shaking his head, Ben followed Joe’s progress down the hill, as he lost him in a grove of trees near the base of the hill. Dropping his head, Ben prayed softly to himself, as he begged for God to be with his son, to guide and comfort him. Hearing the sound of hoof beats, Ben watched as his son took off across the meadow as though the devil was on his tail. Ready to walk away, Ben’s eyes fell upon the book that Joe had dropped in his haste to get away. Bending down, Ben picked it up and dusted the dirt from its cover, fingering the pages, as he leaned against a boulder.

Riding away from Ben, Joe could feel a wealth of emotions overflow within him. The poem that he read had made him think, but the surprise of seeing his pa, had caused all sense of reason to flee from his head. He went back to his old standby mood, defense. Watching as the trees flew past him, Joe finally slowed his horse down, just as he felt another sneeze coming on. Sneezing loudly, he could feel the tenderness in his throat as the force of the sneeze traveled upward. Reaching into his pocket for a handkerchief, he pulled it out and blew his nose, when he suddenly started patting all his pockets. The book of poems! What happened to it? Groaning, he vaguely seemed to remember feeling them fall to the ground when he had jumped up and had failed to pick them back up. Having seen Adam’s scribble in the front of the book, he knew that his older brother wouldn’t be too happy with him once he discovered he had left his book outside. Dang it, Joe thought. Stuffing the handkerchief back into his pocket, he sneezed once again, as he turned his horse around and headed back towards the ridge. Galloping forward, he was stunned to see his pa’s horse still loitering near the grove of trees. A little concerned, Joe slid off Cochise and led him over before dropping the reins to where the other horse stood, munching on patches of grass. Feeling another sneeze coming on, Joe pulled up his jacket and muffled the sound as he climbed the hill. Grabbing hold of a rock to propel him over the edge, he stopped as he heard the deep voice of his pa resonate through the air as he read.

“Most melancholy at that time, O Friend!

Were my day thoughts, my nights were miserable;

Through months, through years, long after the last beat

Of those atrocities, the hour of sleep

To me came rarely charged with natural gifts,

Such ghastly visions had I of despair

And tyranny, and implements of death;

And innocent victims sinking under fear,

And momentary hope, and worn-our prayer,

Each in his separate cell, or penned in crowds

For sacrifice, an struggling with forced mirth

And levity in dungeons, where the dust

Was laid with tears. Then suddenly the scene

Changed, and the unbroken dream entangled me

In long orations, which I strove to plead

Before unjust tribunals, with a voice

Laboring, a brain confounded, and a sense,

Death like, of treacherous desertion, felt…”

Pushing his way from the rock, Joe walked forward as he spoke from memory the last line of the poem, “In the last place of refuge--- my own soul.” Standing still, Joe stood at the edge of the hill as he looked over at Ben, whose cheeks were moist from tears that had slid down from his own eyes on admittance of being unable to help his son. Not knowing what to say, Joe stood there as he could feel all the emotion from the previous week’s build up within his body. Shaking from pent up emotion, Joe wanted to speak, but didn’t know what to say. The past few months had taken a toll on him. He was tired. Exhausted was more like it. Nightmares plagued his dreams, and when they didn’t wake him up, he would awaken early and toss and turn on his bed. That is, once he was able to sleep. Then numerous times during the day, he would be so tired that he had caught himself falling asleep on the job. Looking over at his pa, he shook his head when he thought about the patience he had with him. Suddenly the tension that he had felt building up until this day was ready to break free. Watching Ben with a sense of surrealism, Joe followed his pa’s motions as he stood up from the rock and walked over towards him. Feeling a touch on his shoulder, Joe looked up into the face of Ben. Vaguely hearing the words, “I love you son” enter into his consciousness, Joe had a crackle in his voice as he looked up into Ben’s face and whispered, “Pa.”

Watching the emotions that crossed Joe’s face, Ben wasn’t sure of what to do. His previous attempts to get through to his son, had misfired or fallen down in miscommunication, but this was something he had not seen before. Putting his hand on Joe’s shoulder he just wanted to let him know that he was loved, but with him weaving in front of him, Joe looked like he was barely hanging on. Then when he opened his mouth and spoke the word “pa” Ben was filled with such a desire to show his son his love, that he reached over and enveloped Joe in a hug. Feeling the trembles of emotion course through Joe’s body, Ben held firmly onto Joe passing on his undying love and care for him. Rubbing the back of Joe’s neck, he listened as Joe opened up and poured his soul out to him.

“Pa, I’m so sorry for the way I’ve been acting, so sorry! I’ve been so confused,” he admitted, as he tried to choke back the tears. “I didn’t know who to turn to or what to do. I’m so sorry, pa.” Listening to Joe, Ben could feel his own heart breaking from the struggle that Joe had been fighting from within. “I’m so sorry!” Joe cried, as he felt the comforting hold of his pa.

Holding on to his son, Ben stood there and just listened, relieved that finally the dam that had built up within his son was breaking down. Already he knew of the horrors that had taken place inside the asylum, however when Joe had shared the experience he had neglected to tell how it made him feel. Now was the time to let it out, after having it pent up inside of him for months, Joe was finally ready to share. Ben could feel his own tears fall down his face as they made a trail across his cheeks before dropping silently on the top of Joe’s head. Not saying anything, Ben continued to hold tightly onto his son and listen, as Joe continued to speak, “I didn’t know what to do pa. I was there, and they tied me to a table, and I couldn’t move! I couldn’t move, pa!” Joe began to sob, as the words began to flow out of his mouth. Lost in the world away from where he was, he could still see the place vividly in his head. It was from there that he began to talk, “The rooms, pa, the rooms had no windows, I was afraid that I would never see sunshine again, pa.” Speaking between the tears, he continued, “Oh then pa, the worst thing happened. They tied me to a chair and then dunked me in a tub of water. I couldn’t move pa, I thought I was going to drown and never see you or the Ponderosa again.” Catching his breath, Joe continued, “I felt so trapped, kept from moving or doing anything. I couldn’t stand it! They were going to make me crazy!”

Turning his head, Ben heard the anguish in his son’s voice as he spoke again, “Pa, it was awful, just awful. There was nothing I could do,” gasping between his tears he continued, “I ran but they caught me. Twice I tried to escape and each time they caught me. It wasn’t until I was lying on that straw covered floor tied up in that straightjacket that I realized that I may not make it out of that place alive, because I was not going to willingly stay there. But if I hadn’t run, then they wouldn’t have put me in that sack.” Dismayed, he couldn’t help but gasp as he spoke again, ”Oh pa! I shouldn’t have run, because then Bob wouldn’t be dead!”

Looking down in his son’s face, Ben could see beads of sweat intermingled with the tears that freely fell down his son’s face. Grasping Joe’s chin, he held it still as Joe tried to look down to the ground in shame. “Son,” started Ben, “if you hadn’t run from the asylum, there is a chance you would have been in that place longer.” Then brushing away the tears that streaked down his own face, Ben continued, “The doctor was stalling us, and we had no proof that you were there. We were helpless, yet it was the guard who came through asking a question about Tom Jones that prompted us to take action.”

“But Bob was killed because of me!”

“No he wasn’t son, he died on his own. It was his choice to escape with you, he knew the consequences, and he made the decision on his own. Just like it was your choice to escape.”

“But…” Joe began. Suddenly all the bones in his body seemed to turn to jelly as he dropped to the ground. It was when he was kneeling on his knees, with his face in his hands that he began to sob. Deep heart-wrenching sobs that wrenched even the soul of Ben as he listened. All the emotions that had been building up within his son were finally breaking free. Gone. Bending down, Ben leaned against a rock then pulled his emotionally broken son into his arms as he slowly sank to the ground, holding and comforting him, until the crying ceased. Hiccuping slightly, Joe felt oddly comforted by the feeling of his pa smoothing his hair back from his face, as he leaned against him welcoming the growing feeling of peace within him. Watching as the afternoon sun slowly followed an unseen trail across the sky, Ben couldn’t hazard a guess as to how long he had been with his son. He knew there were other things on the ranch that needed to be taken care of, but at that moment he knew that it was worth it to be with his son. Enjoying the weight of his youngest son resting against him, Ben glanced down and followed his son’s gaze across the countryside.

“It’s a beautiful country, pa,” Joe whispered as he moved against Ben. “I never thought while I was at the asylum, that I would have the opportunity to return and appreciate it.” Moving slightly on the ground, Joe reached into his coat and withdrew a handkerchief. Blowing his nose, he looked up at Ben and smiled. Turning his shining green eyes towards his pa, Joe reached over and clasped hold of his arm, “Pa, thanks for listening.” Then as he lifted himself up from the ground, he lent his hand down to his pa.

“Anytime son, anytime. Welcome home.” Taking Joe’s hand into his own, he gladly accepted help as he stood to his feet. Picking up the book of poetry, Ben reached out and offered it to Joe, watching as he stood there and looked at it.

“You know, I was beginning to think that perhaps my last place of refuge was my soul,” Joe said as he took the book from Ben’s hand. Sliding it into his pocket, he continued, “The only place I could turn and not be bombarded by memories.” Then as he took a few steps toward trail down the hill he stopped to turn around, “But now, I think I can face whatever is thrown my way, with your help.”

Following Joe down the hillside, Ben shook his head in wonderment. The tension that had lined the face of his son for the past few months was gone. The look of peace was so refreshing, that Ben wanted to shout and yell to everyone, that his son was back.

Riding alongside one another, both men were quiet. Their thoughts were far away, yet in another way similar, unbeknownst to the other. Yawning, Joe realized that he truly was tired from the emotion that was spent on the hillside, yet he felt so much better. A load had been lifted from his chest, and now he was able to smell the fresh air and saw the world in color instead of blacks and grays. Yawning again, Joe let out a sigh when he saw the house within sight, with what looked like a buggy sitting in the yard. Pulling to a stop close to the house, they both slid off their horses, when one of the ranch hands approached them.

“Take care of our horses, Bill,” Ben said as both he and Joe handed his reins to him.

As Joe tagged behind, he looked at the buggy trying to figure out who it was. It wasn’t the doctor’s buggy, Joe thought with a grin on his face. That he should be able to recognize from a far distance. Shrugging his shoulders, he followed Ben inside. Feeling the blast of warm air hit them as they entered the house, both men who had entered the house looked over to see Hoss stoking the fire, while Adam sat in a chair next to the settee speaking with a visitor who sat there. Tossing his hat on the rack next to the door, Ben pulled off his coat as he strode forward to greet the visitor, while Joe hung back, sliding his hat onto the side table. Untying the string of his gun belt from his leg he then unbuckled his belt when he looked up to see the visitor, a woman, stand up from her position on the settee. It was an older woman, her dark hair streaked with gray neatly piled up in a bun on the top of her hair. As she stood, Joe noted that she wasn’t very tall, in fact, a rather petite woman. Watching as his pa approached the woman, Joe put his gun belt up before he slid his coat off, tossing it on the coat rack, before moving over to where Ben stood.

“Greetings Mr. Cartwright,” the woman said, as she accepted his handshake. “Your son, Adam has been telling me all about the Ponderosa and Virginia City. You have a beautiful place here, so open and free. In fact,” as she continued, “the smell of pine while riding through here as enough for me to want to bottle it up and carry it back with me to the east.”

Acknowledging her, Ben still didn’t catch her name, “You know my name, but if I may ask, what is yours?"

Laughing, the woman apologized, “I’m so sorry, Mr. Cartwright. My name is Dorthea Dix.”

“Why Miss Dix,” Ben answered in surprise. “I didn’t realize you were going to be in our area so quickly. One of my son’s would have been glad to bring you from town.”

“Oh, I didn’t mind,” she replied, “my business was finished up elsewhere, and so I decided to come on out to Nevada. A kind gentleman from the stable gave me directions to your place. It allowed me an opportunity to take my time and soak up the atmosphere. It is so breathtaking out here, I understand why so many people are leaving the cluttered cities.” Looking over at Joe, she greeted him, “And you must be the one they call Little Joe.”

Frowning a moment, Joe acknowledged the title, “Yes, ma’am, but just Joe will do.”

Turning to Miss Dix, Ben couldn’t help but comment, “We weren’t expecting you this soon, Miss Dix. Adam just finished a letter to send to Mark to encourage you to come.”

“I wasn’t planning on being here this soon, Mr. Cartwright, but the story my cousin shared with me of Joe’s experience, just stayed on my mind. I was desperate to come out and see it for myself.” Laughing softly, she continued, “in fact, in a few days you’ll probably be receiving a letter from Mark announcing my arrival date.”

“Dinner is ready,” Hop Sing announced before anyone else could say a word, as the cook laid down a dish brimming with vegetables.

“This smells absolutely delicious,” complemented Miss Dix, as she turned towards the table. Feeling as Adam placed her hand on his arm she followed him as she was escorted to the table. Settling down, she nodded her thanks to Adam, who pulled out a chair next to her and sat down.

Once everyone was sitting, the food had been blessed and passed around Joe couldn’t help but comment on a statement that she mentioned earlier. “What do you mean the story your cousin shared with you?”

Looking at Adam, she was unsure of what to say. Having heard of Joe’s trouble in dealing with his experience, she didn’t want to be the one to throw him further into his turmoil. Recognizing the trouble that Miss Dix was having, Ben cleared his throat while motioning towards Joe. “Every thing is all right now.”

With a smile lightening all over her face, she leaned across the table and clasped Joe’s hands in her hands as she spoke, “I’ve heard of your experience at the Reno Insane Asylum…” Pausing, she took a moment while the words sunk into Joe’s head.

Chewing on his lip, Joe could feel the urge to run course through his body. Pulling his hands from hers, he forced himself to sit still and not say anything. Even though he had opened up to his pa, he wasn’t too sure about dealing with it so soon. Mulling over it, he glanced around the table as he nodded for her to continue. “Go on please.” Then leaned back in his seat while he waited for her to continue.

Encouraged by the shake of approval from him, she continued, “I would like to see the Reno Asylum to become a better facility. No one should go through what you went through there.”

“But I wasn’t the only one,” sputtered Joe.

“I realize that, and that is one of the reasons I would like to see changes at this asylum. The insane or prisoners will never be cured if they must live within such dreadful conditions,” explained Miss Dix, “I know that by improving the conditions that they live in, will not hurt them. It probably will help. I’m sure this facility you were in could do amazing things, as long as it was run appropriately.”

Turning to Ben, Adam spoke up, “We were talking to Miss Dix before you arrived, and I mentioned that we could take her over to Reno, and show her the asylum.”

“That sounds like a good idea son.” Looking over at Joe, Ben suggested, “You can stay here if you wish.”

“Stay here while you go and visit that place? No way!” Joe replied hotly, “I want to be there when Miss Dix walks through the front door and sees the place. If she has made all these changes elsewhere, I want to be there to help her make a go of it here.”

Concerned, Ben had to make sure, “Are you sure Joe?”

Looking his pa in the eyes Joe had an idea of what he was asking. Having been so fresh in revealing his feelings, he knew that his pa was worried that he wasn’t strong enough to handle it. Dropping his eyes slightly, he raised them back to his face as he asked, “Are you going pa?”

Surprised at the question, Ben nodded his head then he realized where Joe was going with his question. “I’ll be there.” Then he swept his hand across the table, Ben continued, “We all are here for you.”

“Thanks pa,” Joe stuttered, as he turned his attention to eating. Listening to the conversation around him, Joe was finishing up his food when a sneeze made it through his defenses before he could stop it. “Achoo!”

“Bless you,” answered Dorthea, as she fumbled in her reticule for a handkerchief.

Wrinkling his nose, he pulled out of his pocket his own handkerchief and blew deeply into it. Looking over at Ben, who was looking at him with a look of curiosity, Joe knew that he was about to ask if he was sick, and he didn’t want to deal with that at the moment. Feeling a little under the weather, he was determined that nothing was going to stop him from going to Reno. “Excuse me everyone, but I need to get upstairs, and get some rest.”

Bidding his family and their guest a good night, Joe climbed the steps feeling an ache building in his body with each step he took. Rounding the corner, he pushed his door open and with a sign sat down on his bed. Stretching, he rolled his shoulders around trying to relieve the ache, as he tried to remember what he did that day to make him so sore. Sliding his shirt from his shoulders, Joe sneezed again. Rubbing the tickle from his nose, he lay down on the bed and thought of how comfortable it was and then his thoughts wandered off to that afternoon on the ridge. The sense of peace that he had when he had finally opened up was amazing. Normally he would have jumped down Adam’s back for talking to someone else about his problems, but no. What did he do, he welcomed this strange woman and her advice. Smiling slightly, Joe reached down and pulled off his boots, hearing them fall to the floor. Not even bothering to shed his pants, he instead rolled over onto his stomach and he let out a deep sigh as sleep overtook him.

*******************

“Good morning!”

Looking up from the breakfast table, Hoss and Adam’s mouth nearly dropped open from the cheerfulness that rang through Joe’s voice. Watching as he bounced down the steps, they thought back to what Ben had shared with them the previous evening. They hadn’t meant to shed disbelief with Ben but they had their doubts that whatever good humor Joe had the previous day would continue. But here he was, up early this morning and looking like he had a very refreshing sleep. In fact, as Adam thought to himself, there were no nightmares the night before. Tossing aside any of his doubts, Adam returned the greeting, “Morning brother. We’ve saved you some breakfast.”

Pulling the chair out, Joe settled down and then reached over to grab some eggs, “Good morning Miss Dix.”

“Good morning litt… Joe,” she answered, as she caught herself in the middle of the word little. Having already finished her breakfast, she was sitting there sipping on her coffee as her eyes traveled across the face of the young man before her. The night before, when she had first seen him, he looked exhausted and worn out, yet she had been able to catch a brief glimpse in his eyes the night before of a spirit that burned from an internal fire deep within. However, that fire she had merely glanced at before was fully burning within the man now. Watching as he piled his plate with food, she tried not to stare as she listened to the conversation flowing around the table. To be staying with this family was a treat. Despite the patriarchal ruling of the family, that due to the fact there was no woman in the household, the ties within the family were strong. She could sense that if anyone of them were ever injured or mistreated by someone, that the rest of the family would come to their defenses. She admired that, often wishing that she had grown up in a household similar to this. But her own family was lacking in many skills, mainly in the area of raising her and her brothers, so she was shipped off to her grandmother’s to be brought up to be a proper young woman. Smiling slightly, she thought back of how many times she rebelled at the attempts. Catching Joe’s eye, she decided to ask a few questions.

“I was wondering Joe, that is, if you don’t mind me asking, what you can tell me of the asylum?”

Choking slightly on the bread he had just swallowed, he picked up a glass of water and helped it maneuver down into his throat. “Uh, well…” Thinking for a moment, Joe tried to think of what to say. “I know that the doctor there, Dr. Percale…”

“DR. PERCALE?”

Dropping his fork, Joe jumped while he watched as Miss Dix abruptly set down her coffee cup and stood from her seat. “Are you sure Joe, are you sure it was Dr. Percale?”

“Uh, the doctor introduced himself as that. He had an accent that I was guessing was from England.”

“Oh dear, this isn’t good,” she replied, as she listened. Sliding back into her seat, Miss Dix kept clasping and unclasping her hands. “Can you remember what he looks like?”

Shaking his head, Joe replied, “How can I ever forget what he looks like? He was tall and thin, with spectacles. I don’t remember the color of his eyes other than for some reason they reminded me of a snake. I think his hair was blond, but I usually saw him in a dark room and looking at his hair wasn’t my first priority.”

Nodding, Miss Dix soaked up the information. Looking at the men sitting around the table staring at her, she realized she needed to explain her reaction before they thought she herself was crazy. “Please let me explain myself,” she started. “Just over a year ago I was in England helping rehabilitate some workhouses and asylums in that broad city. In one particular town, Liverpool, there was a prison that was notorious for its inhumane treatment of its prisoners.” Accepting some coffee from Adam, she continued, “I went there with some officials from the city, and the conditions that I saw were appalling. There were rats and rodents crawling all over the place. Fleas were rampant in the facility, and there were many prisoners who hadn’t been outside in months. Trapped indoors in that dreadful place. There were two treatments that the doctor there liked to use on his more troublesome patients, one of which they called the water treatment.” Hearing a gasp, Miss Dix stopped as she looked over into the face of Joe. He was sitting across from her with a horror-stricken look across his face, as he struggled to maintain composure.

“The water treatment,” Joe asked, “did it consist of a tub and ducking the patient under the water for a long time?”

“Why yes it was. How did you…” Stopping, she remembered where she was and the reason she was there. “I’m sorry that you were put through that Joe. It was inhumane and you deserved to be treated better.” Reaching over, she wrapped her hands around his and squeezed it before she pulled them away. Continuing with her story, she explained, “When we heard of what was going on, we demanded that the doctor stop the treatments or else leave. He chose to leave, and we lost all contact with him.” Smiling, she continued, “That facility in Liverpool became one of the model asylums in England.” Glancing around the table at the men, she continued, “However, I now know what happened to Dr. Percale. He swore that I would never get in his way again, but when he left Liverpool I never thought he would come to America. In my very own backyard, and continue with his practices! He will be stopped, but I may need your family’s help to do so.”

Listening to her story and Joe’s comments, Ben was more than happy to help. “You are guaranteed our help.”

Nodding, Hoss and Adam agreed. “That’s right Miss Dix,” replied Adam, “if anyone messes with our brother here, and they have to answer to us.”

Smiling, Dorthea thought of her earlier assessment of the family, and knew that was correct when she heard Adam’s answer. Suddenly unable to sit still any longer and allow this doctor free access to the inmates, she asked, “When do you think we may visit Reno?”

Looking over at his sons, Ben tapped his chin as he thought. “Well, if we can get the fences on the north pasture fixed, and a few other items, I don’t see any reason why we can’t leave tomorrow.”

“Oh really? That would be splendid!” she replied. Pushing away from the table, she laid her napkin on the table as she stood up. “If you excuse me gentleman, I’m going to go upstairs and prepare some items for our trip tomorrow.” As she turned, she looked back towards the table, “And I want to thank you all for your help on this.”

“You’re welcome, but we are the ones who should be thanking you,” Ben replied, as he watched her move from her seat.

As she left the table, Ben turned his attention to his sons and gave directions as to what was to be done during the day before they could leave the next day. Watching as each of them moved from the table and grabbed their coats and guns, Ben barely even heard the door shut as he sat mulling over what Miss Dix had said. If this Dr. Percale was the same man from England, he could become a dangerous person when he saw Miss Dix or Joe again. Feeling a sense of apprehension, he pushed it aside as he left the dining room to tackle bills at his desk.

*******************

Flinging his towel over his shoulder and clothes in hand, Joe checked his room for what else he needed for his creek side bath. Having been working on fence duty all afternoon, he hadn’t really noticed the chill that seemed to permeate the air until he walked into his room. Sneezing, he went over and closed his window, and began to have second thoughts about bathing. But when he looked in the mirror at the dirt that was caked throughout his hair he decided to follow through. Grabbing a bar of soap, he went down the stairs when he saw Ben leaving the kitchen. “Hi pa!”

“Joe?”

Halting mid-step next to the door, Joe was in the process of opening the door when he heard Ben speak again.

“Taking a bath?”

Slinging the towel over his shoulder, he was about to take a step outside when he answered, “Yes sir.” But then he froze when he heard the next question.

“Why don’t I have Hop Sing draw you some water for your bath?”

Looking outside Joe could see his breath as he breathed out and felt the chill from the air inch its way into his clothing. Chewing on his bottom lip he thought about what his pa was suggesting. Glancing over at him, it was then that he noticed Miss Dix sitting at the dining table, paperwork strewn all over it. Almost curious as to what her reaction would be if he went out, Joe leaned his head against the door as he thought. Coming to a decision, he once again glanced over at Miss Dix, feeling assured about his decision. He could lick this demon he thought, as he looked over at Ben, and imperceptibly nodded his head.

Ben was ready to call for Hop Sing, when Hoss, who was sitting over at the hearth stoking the fire jumped up. “Pa, Hop Sing is heating water for my tub right now, but I don’t mind if Joe takes a turn at it first.” Moving out of the room before either Ben or Joe could reply he went into the kitchen to help Hop Sing.

Slowly pushing the front door closed, Joe stood there with the doorknob still in his hand, when he felt Ben’s hand fall upon his shoulder. Turning around, Joe couldn’t even hear the words that were coming from his lips nor the hand that remained on his shoulder. Walking over to the fireplace, he stood in front and warmed his hands as he waited for the bath to be ready. Feeling a tap on his shoulder, Joe jumped slightly as he looked up and saw Hoss speaking to him. Lost in his world of memories, Joe noiselessly followed him out to a side room off the side of the kitchen, where the tub was set up. Feeling the heat from the fire blasting away, Joe vaguely nodded as Hoss left the room, leaving him alone, while he stared at the metal tub. Carefully he walked over to the edge and looked down into the water and when he saw his reflection, he began to shake when his memories assaulted him once more of the last time he was in one. Gasping for breath, Joe breathed heavily as he swallowed hard, trying to push the memories away. Closing his eyes he swayed as he remembered his struggle for air. Then the memory of the leather straps around him, tying him down to the wooden chair came back. Memories of the cold water that drowned him in the water, before at the last moment when his air was expiring he was lifted up. Pushing himself away from the tub he stood next to the wall breathing heavily in an attempt to gain control.

Lifting his head, he refused to look at the tub as he went over to the door and flung the door open, looking off towards the creek that beckoned him to it. Tempted to go out there, he stood in the doorway, on a precipice as to which direction he could take. He could either conquer his fear and stay inside with a warm, steamy bath or go outside and deal with his fears another time, by going ahead to the creek to take a bath. As the cool air trickled in, it seemed to put sense into his head. I can’t continue taking a bath outside, Joe thought to himself. Stepping back inside, he leaned his back against the door as he closed it and stared at the tub, watching as the steam rose from the heated water. Thinking briefly of Dr. Percale, an image of his laughing face came to mind. Suddenly Joe knew what he had to do. He had to face this demon, and the only one who could conquer it was he, Joe. Not even thinking further on it, Joe flung the towel to the floor and began stripping the clothes off from his body, tossing them haphazardly to the floor. Standing naked before the tub, Joe closed his eyes and lifted one leg over into the tub. Feeling the warm water caress his thigh, he felt boldness overcome him as he lifted his other leg into the water. Standing there in the tub of water, Joe didn’t care at the moment at how it might appear to anyone daring enough to look in. His thoughts were elsewhere at the moment. He stood there and felt the warm water swirling between his legs. Placing his hands on the side of the tub, he couldn’t help but notice the similarities between this tub and the one he had been dunked in. Both were hard, metallic structures, however this one was in a home that was surrounded with loving people. Slowly he sank his body down into the water, feeling as the warm water lapped against his dry skin. As he sat in the tub, feeling the water bump against his skin, Joe felt a layer of tension float away before he carefully leaned his head back, resting it on the back of the tub. The water created a soothing sensation, as the heat from the water sent all his worries away in the steam that rose from the tub.

Worried about his son, Ben excused himself from the living room and went to check on Joe. Standing at the door, he was stumped as to what he should do. Raising his hand to knock, he dropped it and instead turned the doorknob and quietly pushed the door open. Seeing clothes strewn across the floor, a relieved smile came to his face as he saw the familiar curly head of his son resting in the tub. All concerns were washed away, as he quietly closed the door behind him. Releasing the air he had been holding, Ben smiled. His son had conquered his fear.

********************

“Early one morning, just as the sun was rising, I heard a young man snoring, in the valley below…”

Waking to the sound of singing, Joe sat up in his bed and tried to shake the sound from his head. Taking a moment, he realized that it was his brother Adam singing out in the hallway. Hearing him purposely miss a high note, Joe groaned. Grabbing his pillow he tried covering his ears, but as much as he tried covering up the sound the louder it got. Yanking the pillow back, he was ready to holler out when he saw the grinning face of his brother standing at the end of his bed.

“What’s wrong? I’m offended you don’t like my rendition of the song!” Adam said with a look of mock horror on his face.

Making a face, Joe threw his pillow at him. “I think I like the original song better.” Leaning forward on his bed, he reached over and grabbed a shirt from the chair next to him. Shedding his nightshirt, he caught a glimpse of Adam as he left the room.

Later after breakfast, everyone gathered outside and packed their gear on the horses. Feeling a tickle in the back of his throat, Joe groaned. Usually when a sneeze came on, he was able to get away from family and let it loose. Unfortunately, he was surrounded. As the sneezed exploded, he could feel it as it went up the channel of rawness in his throat. Swallowing made it feel all that much worse. Having noticed it breakfast, at the time he had attributed it to a dry throat, but now he wasn’t too sure. Lost in his thoughts, he looked over just in time to see his pa moving towards him. Quickly burying a subsequent cough in the saddle blanket, he moved around to the other side of his horse in a move to check the cinch.

“How are you feeling this morning Joe?” Ben asked, as he moved closer to where Joe stood. Watching as he moved out of reach, Ben shook his head as he heard the familiar reply of “I’m fine”. Whenever Ben tried to venture closer to him, Joe had a way of moving from him. Not wanting to chase him around the horse to check his temperature, Ben rolled his eyes at his son’s childish behavior. From a distance, he could see a glazed look in his son’s eyes, caused by something other than tears which were at that point, long gone.

Watching Ben roll his eyes, Joe couldn’t help but roll his eyes. Oh good grief, as though I’m a child who needs his temperature checked. Checking the bridle, Joe watched from the corner of his eye as Ben moved around and acted as though he was walking back to his horse, although to Joe it seemed like he was taking the long way around. Sidestepping him, Joe moved to the other side of his horse and vaulted on, grabbing the reins in his hand, eager to go. Looking around the yard, he noticed that everyone had their horses saddled and the gear packed away. Seeing Miss Dix on the other side, he was about to jump down and help her up, when he saw that Hoss was giving her a helping hand up.

Adjusting her feet in the stirrups she thanked Hoss as she commented, “I’m glad I thought to bring my riding outfit.”

Kicking some dirt on the ground, Hoss looked up at her as he asked, “Are you sure ma’am, that you don’t want to take a buggy out to Reno?”

Smiling down at him, she answered, “Do you think that would be practical?”

“Well,” stuttered Hoss, as he struggled for an answer, “it might be a bit more comfortable.”

“Don’t worry Hoss, I’ll be fine.” Patting her horse on the side, she accepted the reins handed to her, and waited for everyone to move out.

Seeing that everyone had been taken care of, Hoss stepped into the stirrups and pulled himself on his horse. Calling out, he led the group down the road to Reno.

After riding for most of the day, they stopped a few times during the day so that Miss Dix could get off her horse and rest her legs. Feeling a bit tired Joe was more than willing to stop also, taking those moments to sip moisture down into his sore throat. His bones seemed to ache despite the numerous stops they had. It wasn’t until later that evening that they decided to stop and make camp, firm in the knowledge that they would be in Reno by the next evening. Eating a little bit of supper, Joe was soon snuggled down in his bedroll, with his hat pulled across his face, fast asleep.

Looking over at his son, Ben had noticed his less than exuberant behavior on the trail, but he had chalked it up to his nervousness with them getting closer to Reno. Then this evening, as he was eating, Ben could tell that his throat had to have been sore, because every time he swallowed he would grimace. Glancing over at his sons, he voiced his concern, “I’m getting a bit worried about Joe. I’m not sure if it is stress or illness, but he’s acting tired and almost out of it at times.”

Nodding, Hoss answered before Adam, “Yeah, I’ve noticed that also. When I pulled up next to him earlier, it looked like he was drooping a little.” Continuing, he explained, “I asked him how he was doing, and he said fine.”

“When is he not fine?” Adam grunted.

“Yeah, well, we were on the trail and decided that if he started dragging behind I was going to say something.”

Setting her plate down, Miss Dix stood up and walked over to where Joe lay. Watching as he tossed in his sleep, she took the opportunity when his hat slid from his face to reach down and lay the back of her hand on his forehead. Looking up she smiled and spoke, “He has a slight fever. I suggest that we let him sleep in tomorrow morning to gather some rest and energy.” Reaching down, she picked up his hat, and tenderly placed it back onto his head. Standing up, she continued, “I don’t mind getting to Reno later tomorrow. I would rather know that Joe is okay.”

Nodding, Ben agreed and suggested that they all turn in for the night. Stoking the fire, he threw another log on before he also turned in for the night.

The next morning, the men rose at daybreak, leaving Joe alone as he slept peacefully by the campfire. It wasn’t until the smell of coffee drifted through the campsite, that Joe woke from his sleep. Swallowing, he winced slightly as he noticed that the sore throat from the day before was still there. Pushing his hat off his head, he turned his sleepy eyes towards the fire and saw that everyone was already up and dressed, and what it appeared, already packed. A bit disgruntled at being allowed to sleep in, he looked over and saw his pa watching him.

“Morning son”

“Pa,” Joe answered as he stretched, kicking the bedroll off him.

“How are you feeling?”

“I’m fine,” but when he saw the look on Ben’s face, Joe knew that he wasn’t hiding anything. Sighing, he replied, “Actually, I’m okay although my throat does hurt a little.”

“I seem to recall the last time that you were sick, we were headed the other direction.”

Puzzled, Joe looked at him. “We were leaving the asylum,” answered Ben to his look. “You were quite out of it.” Reaching down, he mussed with his hair, noting the slight temperature that was still radiating from his skin. Choosing not to say a word, he instead offered his hand for Joe to pull himself up from the ground with.

“Thanks pa.”

Bending down, Joe began to roll up his bedroll, when Adam came over and grabbed his saddle, “Hey!”

“I’m saving us some time, I’ll saddle your horse,” Adam replied as he slung it over his shoulder.

Staring after him, Joe stood there open mouthed. Shrugging his shoulders, he didn’t mind. He was actually relieved that he didn’t have to expend any extra energy. Still tired and sore, despite a good night’s rest, he wasn’t really looking forward to another day’s journey on horseback. Suddenly wishing that Miss Dix had brought the buggy, he shook his head at the thought. Oh yea Joe, make a grand appearance back in Reno being carted around in a buggy. Throwing his bedroll over his shoulder, he went over to where Adam had just finished tightening the cinch. Placing the bedroll on the horse, he securely tied it down as he rested against his horse. Staring off into the distance, he inadvertently began thinking of the asylum. Sensing someone behind him, Joe turned to see Miss Dix standing there.

“How are you doing Joe?” she asked. With a smile on her face she continued.” And I would like an answer other than fine.”

Smiling back at her, Joe knew that she wasn’t asking about his physical health at the moment, rather how he felt in returning to the asylum. “Honestly, I’m not sure. I’ve tried not to think about it for so long, I’m not sure how I’m doing.” Rearranging his hat, he looked off into the distance before turning to face her again, “But I do know, the closer we get to Reno the more nervous I am becoming.”

“If you don’t mind me asking, how did you end up in that prison wagon?”

Joe shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know. My guess is that the other prisoner somehow escaped when they stopped, and I just came along at the wrong moment. Being as they had a dead prisoner on their hands, rather than admit they killed him they swapped my identity with his. My guess is that they never stopped to think that I might actually belong with someone.” Joe explained, “So many young men out here are just passing through, with no families. Normally, someone could have probably gotten away with it. They just chose the wrong person.” With a sad smile on his face, Joe thought back to that day, and almost wished he hadn’t. He could still see the wagon in the distance, but he hadn’t noticed anything odd about it. Having been lost in thoughts at the time, he never knew that danger lurked. Never knew. Until the heavy blow struck his hand, and fate tossed him into the back of a prison wagon.

Watching the faraway look spread across his face, both Dorthea and Joe were relieved when Adam came over to let them know they were ready to go. Climbing onto his horse’s back, Joe shook his head when he felt another determined sneeze fight its way through. Wiping his nose, he noticed that his cheeks were moist from tears that trickled from his eyes.

********************

“Welcome to Reno, Miss Dix,” announced Hoss, “what do you think of this fine city?”

Coughing slightly from the buildup of dust that traveled in front of her, she nodded her head. “It’s rustic, but a very popular place it seems.” Looking around she saw the multitude of wooden buildings occupied by a variety of occupations, from numerous saloons to several merchants selling mercantile. As she followed behind the Cartwrights down the street, she saw off in the distance the doctor’s office. Pulling her horse close to the men, she slowed her horse down as the men slowed theirs down. Watching, she saw Ben glance off towards the doctor’s office then over at his son, he caught her glance. Nodding at him, she rode up and spoke with Joe, distracting him from their true mission, as Hoss and Adam rode towards the hotel.

Without realizing it, Joe slowed his horse to a stop and slid off his horse, following Miss Dix and his pa into a building. It wasn’t until he walked inside and smelled the odor of antiseptic that he realized he had been tricked. Backing towards the door, he couldn’t help but fuss as Ben grabbed hold of his arm. “Aw pa. Why are we here? It’s late in the night, and I doubt the doctor will even be here.”

Reaching over with his hand, Ben brushed against Joe’s forehead. Nodding, he replied, “You still have a fever, and before you go anywhere you are going to see the doctor.”

Glancing over towards the door, Joe saw Miss Dix there, as though standing guard. Sighing, he looked over at a chair near the wall, and sighed again as he sank into it. Actually he was happy for the break. The ride this morning had really worn him out. True, they had numerous stops, but all it seemed to do was sap his energy out. Hearing the door open, all eyes turned to a man who entered the room.

“Evening gentleman, ma’am,” he greeted. “Surprised to have visitors this late in the night, so what can I do for you?” Looking around the room, he didn’t see anything wrong, until his eyes settled on the young man sitting. Catching his eyes, he noted that they were glazed more than likely from a fever. Hearing the older gentleman clear his throat, the doctor turned to face him.

”We’ve been on the trail, and realized that my son here was feeling ill. Saw your lights on,” Ben explained, “and took the chance that you could look him over.”

Guessing correctly that the young man was his patient, he motioned towards a back room. “My name is Dr. Nickels and now if this young man would follow me to the back room, I’ll examine him.”

Sputtering, Joe looked up. “What? I tell you I’m fine.”

Smiling, the doctor explained, “You’re eyes are glazed, indicating a fever. Also the skin on your face is flushed, another indication that you’re ill. And,” as he continued, “I bet you also have a sore throat.” Opening the door, he waited for Joe to rise, “So if you don’t mind, if you’ll follow me it will allow me to get some rest at some point this evening.”

Listening to the doctor, Joe made a face as he made one more plea to his pa, “Pa, really I’m feeling better, can’t we go?”

Shaking his head, Ben went over to where Joe was sitting and helped him from the seat as he gently pushed him towards the doctor. “I’ll be out here waiting. Don’t give that doctor any trouble.” Then watching as he lost sight of both men, Ben turned to Dorthea. “Miss Dix, would you like a seat?”

“What? Oh no thank you. After hours of sitting on a rocking horse, I’m not sure if sitting down on the hard chair is the thing for me.”

Smiling at her answer, Ben just nodded. Engaging in chitchat for a while, the time flew before the door opened from the back exposing two men, one of which seemed very disgruntled. “I was just telling your son here, that he needs a few days of rest to fight the infection that has entered his body. He happened to admit that he had been taking some baths outdoors, and personally I wouldn’t recommend that.” Handing Ben a bottle of medication, he explained the directions before turning to the Dorthea. “I seem to recognize you, although I can’t place where.”

“My name is Dorthea Dix, perhaps you know of my work?”

“Dorthea! Why yes I do know, being as I was on one of the boards that recommended you to several asylums in Boston. I never expected to see you west of the Mississippi.”

“Well,” she replied, “I’m out here on a special case. Perhaps you know of the Insane Asylum that is located in this area?”

Nodding his head, he answered, “Ahhh, yes. I’ve been trying to get the place shut down. Nearly happened a few months ago without my help though. There was a really bad typhus epidemic that ran through there, killing about 70 percent of the people. The doctor there refused any outsiders access in, so it was frustrating to know that people were dying and not being able to do a damn thing.”

Hearing that, Miss Dix stood there and shook her head, “That shouldn’t be happening.” Looking up to the doctor, she asked, “Would you like to come out with me, I mean us,” she swept her hand towards the Cartwright’s, “and see the facility?”

Scratching his head for a moment while he thought, he spoke, “You know, I think I will. I’ve heard a lot of stories about the place, and have never had the opportunity to gain access indoors.” Pulling his coat from the chair by his desk, he swung it on as he asked, “Would you like to join me for coffee to talk about this?”

Despite the exhaustion she felt from riding, the opportunity to talk to a fellow colleague about the conditions was intriguing. Nodding, she agreed as Ben turned to tell her where they were staying for the night. Turning to Joe, Ben could tell that his son was nearly asleep in a chair. Tapping his son on the shoulder, he soon resorted to shaking him as he watched Joe drowsily stand to his feet, trying his best to look alert. Shaking his head, Joe tried to clear his head. Whatever that stuff was the doctor had given him, had nearly knocked him out. Feeling a bit groggy, he followed his pa out the door, stepping down off the boardwalk and stared at his horse. A bit disoriented, he turned and looked at Ben with a question in his eyes.

Ben, who was in the process of untying his horse looked over at Joe and saw the way he was looking. Standing there wavering in front of his horse, he suddenly knew that Joe was in no condition to be going anywhere on his own. Retying the reins to the post, Ben went over to where Joe stood and touched him on his shoulder. Feeling the weight of his son sink against him, Ben shook his head. Looking down the street, he tried to see in the darkened evening just how far the hotel was when he saw his older son’s walking towards him.

“Hi pa, looks like you have a problem there. What’s wrong with him?”

Turning to Hoss, Ben replied, “The doc gave him some medication and it has nearly knocked him out.” Looking over at the horses, he continued, “I don’t think he can ride on his own down to the hotel.”

Reaching over, Hoss took his younger brother by the waist and helped him walk up to the boardwalk. Feeling his brother’s weight leaning against him, he watched as Adam took the other side of him and helped shoulder the weight. Walking down several blocks, they checked every now and then the condition of their brother between them. Entering into the hotel, Hoss looked towards the stairs then with one swoop lifted Joe up in his arms and carried him up the stairs then down the hallway to the suite. Opening the door, Adam pushed it wide then went ahead to the bedroom watching, as Hoss took entered with Joe. Gently laying him down, they turned and saw Ben carrying in the saddlebags from both horses, dropping them to the floor as he made his way over to his ill son.

Feeling the soft bed beneath his body, Joe wanted to snuggle further down into the bed as hands started reaching down to tug off his clothing. Slapping their hands away, he tried pulling up the covers as he felt the boots being tugged off his feet. Moaning to himself, he let out a sigh as he muffled a sneeze in the pillow. Rolling over, he felt himself drift off into sleep.

Putting the bottle of medicine next to the table, Ben straightened his son’s covers and motioned for his other son’s to leave the room as he closed the door behind him.

********************

Hearing a knock at the door, Ben opened it and saw that it was Dorthea on the other side. “Good morning Mr. Cartwright.”

“Good morning Miss Dix, I trust you slept well.” Looking around her he didn’t see anyone else around, “Will Dr. Nickels be joining you today?”

“No, he said he would go with us out there tomorrow. He had something he needed to do today,” Dorthea answered as she entered into the room.

Sitting down in a chair that Ben motioned to, she had just settled when Hoss and Adam walked in the door, causing Ben to ask, “Hoss, Adam, do you have the horses saddled?”

“Yes sir, we’re ready to go whenever Miss Dix is ready.”

“Oh, yes I am,” she replied. Standing up she looked around the room, “Is Joe going to be joining us?”

Shaking his head, Ben replied, “Not today. He needs to get his fever down and rest before I even consider allowing him to go.”

Nodding her head in understanding, she followed Hoss and Adam out the door, as Ben turned around and headed back into Joe’s room. Going over to his bedside, Ben felt of his forehead and nodded to himself. Good, the temperature isn’t going up like I feared, he thought as he sat on the edge of his bed while his thoughts turned to Hoss and Adam as they went back to that God-forsaken place.

********************

“I’m coming, I’m coming!”

Standing in front of the asylum large door, Adam and Hoss had a feeling of déjà vu from the last time they had stood there. Looking at one another, they passed a glance as the mutual thoughts passed from one another. Glancing over at Miss Dix, they watched as she composed herself and straightened her skirts, as she nodded for Hoss to bang again on the door.

Hearing the slinging of a bolt, they watching as the door swung open, with the doorframe filled with a large buxom woman who stood in front of them. Her dark dress was covered with what must have been a clean apron at one time. Patting down on her sprigs of hair that escaped from her bun, she asked, “Whaddya want?”

“I would like to see Dr. Percale please,” Dorthea answered.

“He ain’t here at the moment. He’ll be back tomorrow some time.”

Unconcerned, Dorthea walked on in through the doorway, watching as the woman moved out her way. “I would like to see the facility. Could you lead the way please?”

Adam’s eyebrow’s raised at the authority that she assumed. Following her inside, he glanced over to see Hoss’s mouth dropped open. “Close your mouth Hoss,” Adam suggested as they followed the women indoors. Standing in the lobby, Adam subconsciously looked over at the couch where Dr. Percale had laid when they carried his brother out. Nothing had changed in the room. There were a few wooden chairs that looked to be in disrepair, and the couch looked to be leaning on one leg. Off to one end was a door, and the other wall mirrored it with a door on. The walls were wooden planks, and as Adam approached it he could see splinters that hung loosely from its edges. Reaching up, he felt along the rough edge, he hated to think of how it would feel to have those digging into his skin. Looking down, the floor was swept clean, although he could see clippings of hay here and there on the floor. Feeling a tap on his shoulder, he saw Hoss motioning him towards the far door. There was Miss Dix, leading the way down the hall, with the woman sputtering behind her.

“She just opened that door and took off,” whispered Hoss. “I figured we’d stay close to her and make sure she’s safe.”

Nodding, Adam agreed. “Let’s hurry so she doesn’t get too far ahead.” Following along the flickering lamps set in the hallway, Adam already felt like running. There was a bad smell throughout the halls, and as they walked past closed doors he could hear screaming and yelling coming from within. Cringing, he heard the sound of a woman screaming before being suddenly cut off. Walking down the hallway, there was a steady stream of water they splashed through when he heard Hoss asking him where the water was coming from. Adam just shook his head. Having seen water trickling from the room they had just passed, he realized that the screaming had come just as the woman was being dunked below in a water treatment room. Pushing his way forward, he tried to focus on what Miss Dix was saying and not of the depressing building that he was in.

“Is there a board of directors here?”

Sneezing, the woman wiped her hand across her nose before answering, “Nope, it’s just Dr. Percale and us staff that help him out. We ain’t got no needs for nobody else to snoop around.”

“There have been others?”

“Aw, just the sheriff and his deputy.” Cackling, she continued, “but the doctor, he brung out Cindy and we ain’t seen them again.”

“Cindy?”

“Yeah, she’s a stringy thing, all skin and bones, with the brightest patch of blonde hair you’ll ever see on a girl. But she got a bad habit of freakin’ out when somebody touches or gets close to her. I wouldn’t be surprised if that doctor in thar town had to patch the two of them fellas up.”

Seeing a patch of light up ahead, Hoss pushed his way past his brother and the two women. He was feeling sick to his stomach, and the lack of sunshine was putting him into a funk. Seeing the light in the hall ahead, he had plunged forward and shoved the door open. Feeling the sunshine streak across his face, he took the opportunity to look around where he was. Surrounded by a courtyard, there was not a bit of shade anywhere, except for in the middle of the yard. A large tree that seemed to have lost most of its bark, that is up to just above six feet. Beyond that, the bark was in place. Puzzled as to the oddity, he went up to it. Hearing Adam’s sigh behind him, he turned. “Feels good out here don’t it?”

“Yeah, wasn’t sure how much more of that darkness I could take.”

“Look here at this bark, I ain’t ever seen a tree like it before.” Examining the tree, they both were puzzled by what caused the phenomenon. Ever bit of bark below six and half feet was gone, leaving the bare hardwood below it. Hearing Miss Dix speak, both men turned towards her.

“That is caused by people digging the bark from the tree. You notice that it doesn’t go above seven feet. Most of the people here are probably shorter than that. Some will eat the bark, while others just do it to peel the bark off.” Looking to the ground, they saw only bits and pieces of bark on the ground. “Apparently, most of it has either been eaten or ground into the ground.” Noticing the shocked looks on their faces, she smiled. “I realize it is surprising. The first time I came upon an instance like that, I couldn’t believe it. But yes, I actually saw it done. It is usually at the worst asylum’s where I’ve seen this happen.”

Shaking his head, Hoss just stared at the tree. “It’s a shame. It’s truly a shame.”

Walking back indoors, they followed the hallway on around the building, passing through where the prisoner’s cells were. They could hear cries and talking from the rooms, and as one door opened, Adam got a brief glimpse inside. Feeling sick to his stomach, all he saw was darkness, with the only patch of light entering from the lamp in a guard’s hand who was putting an inmate back in. On a dirty cot in the corner, the prisoner collapsed and lay listlessly on the bed, while scattered around on the floor was straw at least a foot deep. As they passed by the room, Adam turned to ask Miss Dix, “Why is there so much straw on the floor?”

“That’s their toilet.”

Stopping, Adam grabbed hold of Dorthea’s arm, “You mean they have no chamber pot or some place of decency to go?”

“No,” Dorthea replied sadly. “This reminds me a lot of the first institutions that I visited. In fact, it reminds me a lot of the asylum in England, the one that Dr. Percale ran.”

“This is disgusting, absolutely disgusting.” Suddenly realizing that this was the place where Joe had been kept for days, Adam felt deep empathy for his brother. No wonder he didn’t want to talk, he himself would probably want to bury it far away and never think of it again. Poor Joe. All of a sudden anger poured through his pores as he turned to speak to Dorthea, “Where else can these people go? What can be done here?”

“The place here is in such terrible disrepair that I think it would have to be torn down and restarted from scratch to make an improvement.” Walking down the hallway, she pointed towards the outside walls, “Look at that. There are no windows in this place. Absolutely none. How can someone get better when they have to live in dingy, stale air all the time and not experience the healing power of the sun?” Shaking her head, she continued, “No, I think the best thing for these prisoner’s is to be transferred elsewhere until changes can be made here.” Looking up from where she was walking, she realized that they had made it back to the front entrance. “See that small window on the door, there is a small shaft of sunshine filtering in. Doesn’t it make you feel welcome?”

Walking over to the door, she opened it and let in all the fresh air, giving Hoss and Adam a chance to see just how filthy everything was inside. “Shall we go gentleman? I believe our host has left us on our own.”

Looking around them, the men realized that the woman that had been with them earlier had disappeared. Shrugging their shoulders, they followed Miss Dix on out the door and to their horses. It wasn’t until later that afternoon that they made it back to the hotel. Pushing the door open, they saw Ben and Joe arguing in the sitting area.

“There they are! Why did you go without me?” Joe demanded.

Walking over to Joe, Dorthea put her hand on her forehead and smiled. “You look a lot better, and you’re temperature has gone down. Did you have a good rest?”

A bit subdued from her concern, Joe nodded although he was still upset. “Yeah, I was a little tired when I woke up,” he admitted, “but now I’m ready to go.”

Patting him on the shoulder, Dorthea suggested, “Well, why don’t you rest up this evening and you can go with us first thing in the morning.”

“Well, okay,” he agreed, “Although, I still don’t like it that you guys left me this morning without even telling me.”

********************

Early the next morning, Joe was the first one up and out of bed, not wanting to be left behind this morning. Sitting in the chair, he had to admit to himself, that even though initially when he first woke up he felt great, but as time went by he could feel his energy lagging. Coughing slightly he leaned his head back against the chair, relaxing as he closed his eyes.

Shutting the door shut behind him, Ben looked across the room and saw his youngest asleep in the chair. Shaking his head, he was reminded of how stubborn his son was at times like this. Knocking on the door across from him, he stopped when it opened and his two other son’s came out. “Morning pa.”

“Hoss, Adam,” then pointing over towards Joe he continued, “he was up at the break of dawn and sat in that chair to make sure we didn’t leave him today.”

“He doing any better?”

“No longer has a fever, although he is still coughing and sneezing,” Ben explained. “I’d rather he stay in another day, but having told him he could go if he had no fever I can’t change my mind on him. Especially after the scene yesterday.”

“Hoss and I will keep an eye on him, make sure he doesn’t overdo it.”

“Thanks son.” Hearing a knock at the door, Ben went over to the door to reveal Miss Dix and Dr. Nickels. “Good morning Miss Dix, doctor.”

Nodding, the doctor looked over at the sleeping figure of Joe and asked, “How’s he doing?”

“Much better than that first day,” Ben answered. “His fever faded away early in the morning hours and he spent the rest of the night in bed sleeping.”

“Good,” Miss Dix replied. “I hope you don’t mind, but the doctor is taking his buggy, and we are going to be riding together. If you wish, Joe can ride out there with us.”

Hearing voices around him, Joe sneezed as he slowly opened his eyes. Jumping to his feet, he swayed briefly from his lurch up, and sheepishly asked, “How long have you guys been standing here?”

“Long enough to hear a snore come out,” Adam replied with a grin on his face.

“I don’t snore!”

Seeing that Joe had the potential of getting wound up, Ben stepped in, “Okay, let’s not argue here.” Helping Joe steady himself, Ben turned to the others in the room. “We’re ready here, I suggest we grab something to eat and then head on out to the asylum.” Then turning back to Joe, he asked, “Miss Dix and the doctor are taking a buggy out to the asylum. Would you like to ride out with them?”

“Pa no!”

Hearing Joe’s protests, Ben wasn’t too surprised at the answer. Nodding, he smiled something between a grin and a grimace. Watching as Hoss, Adam and Joe left he waited until he had a moment alone with the doctor and Miss Dix. “Thanks for the offer, although I knew that was the answer we’d get.”

Smiling, Miss Dix answered, “No problem. Just know that it is available for anytime any your family needs its use.”

Pulling the door shut Ben briefly closed his eyes, hoping that the day would not lead to disappointment for his son. But even more, that visiting the asylum wouldn’t plunge him back into the world of despair.

It was more than an hour later that the riders found that they were closing in on the Reno Insane Asylum. Most of them were talking, although there was one rider that was having a feeling of trepidation as they rode closer and closer to the facility. Seeing the building in the distance sent tremors of fear through Joe’s body. Seeing it for a second time made Joe realize that it wasn’t as large as he had imagined, although it was still just as dilapidated from the last time he saw it. Staring at it, he again remembered the lack of windows, and at times when he was home wondered if it was a figment of his dreams or reality. On top of his horse, he saw that it was reality. As they closed in on the building, Joe scanned the area and could see the large tree near the back of the building, the same tree that was situated in the courtyard of the asylum. Pulling his horse to a stop, Joe kicked his feet free of the stirrups and slid off. Stumbling over the rocks that were abundant in the area, he never even noticed as he found himself lost in his memories. Nor did he realize that the other riders had pulled their horses to a stop as they watched Joe. Never hearing the voice of his pa, Joe walked forward with the reins of his horse in hand as flashes of memory came flooding back. This was where the wagon had pulled to a stop, and probably about where he started waking back up from his attack. Wrinkling up his nose, he could almost smell the stench from the guard’s body from when he had been thrust in his face. Walking slowly he could still hear the way the chains clanked together as he shuffled along behind the other two inmates. Not paying attention to the distance, he realized with a start that he was standing before the massive door. Remembering the last time he stood in front of the door, he felt himself reliving the moment when his shackles were released and he was ordered to remove his clothing. On the verge of running, he was so lost in his thoughts that he never saw his pa walking up behind him until he felt his hand on his shoulder. Lurching forward, Joe shivered as he pulled himself out of his reverie and looked over at Ben. “Oh pa, I don’t know if I could do this on my own.”

“That’s why I’m here son.”

Motioning over to the other riders, they dismounted and removed themselves from the buggy and after tying up the horses approached the pair. Reaching around Joe, Hoss banged on the door. Hearing a scurry sound on the other side, a bolt was lifted and the sound of it echoed outside. Peeking around the door, all those outside caught site of a petite older woman, different from the day before, her stringy hair lying loosely around her shoulders. Her face was lined with dark wrinkles, with her darkened skin from the sun making them all the more pronounced. Clearing her voice, she asked, “Whatya want?”

Pushing her way forward, Miss Dix faced the woman, “We would like to see Dr. Percale.”

“He ain’t in.”

“When do you expect him to be back?”

“Supposin’ he got his supplies, he ta be here today sometime.”

“Then, I suppose it will be fine if we come in while we wait.” Not even bothering to wait for a reply, Dorthea entered the building followed by Dr. Nickels and the Cartwrights. Leading the way, she didn’t bother asking the woman if they could go through the institution, rather she told her. “I need to take some notes on the facility. If Dr. Percale comes, please let him know that I am on the grounds.”

Staring open mouthed at the boldness of the visitor, the older woman snapped it shut, as she replied, “I don’t think that he’s gonna like you walkin’ around without his permission.”

“Then you let him tell that to me,” Dorthea replied as she pushed the door open and went down the hallway.

Glancing over at the woman left standing in the waiting room, Ben noticed her staring at Joe as they followed the doctor and Miss Dix down the hallway. Walking a few paces in front of his pa, and several behind his brothers, Joe began to slow down as he walked down the pathway. The smells suddenly seemed to overtake his senses as memories, many of them unwelcome, began to assault him. Suddenly overtaken by a tickle in the back of his throat, he went through a round of coughing. Slowing down, he came to a point where he was leaning against the roughhewn wall. Barely feeling the splinters poking into his skin, he easily felt the hand of his pa upon his shoulder, he sighed.

“How are you doing son?”

Shaking his head, he just stood not knowing what to say. There were too many emotions running through his head, and it was by pure determination that he was still standing there, and not running right back out the doors they had entered. That plus he was having trouble catching his breath after that last round of coughing.

Having heard Joe’s coughing spell, the others slowed down while Hoss returned to where Joe and Ben were. “Pa?”

“Why don’t you go ahead with Miss Dix and Dr. Nickels,” Ben suggested. “I’ll be here with Joe.”

“You sure pa?”

Nodding, Ben motioned Hoss to rejoin his brother and continue the inspection. Moving his arms around Joe, he propped his son against his body and asked, “Do you want to go back?”

Violently shaking his head, Joe replied, “NO!” Feeling some strength regain, he coughed again, this time a little more forcefully as his body tried to rid it of the infection. “Honestly pa, I’m fine. The coughing threw me off guard for a second.”

“How about some water?”

Looking up at him, Joe nodded, “I know the way.” Leading, he took a hallway to the left that led them to the kitchen. Glancing off towards the dining room, Joe turned his head away so that he wasn’t reminded of the meals in that room. He could still taste the lumpy oatmeal that was a constant serving. Shaking his head, he motioned to his pa to follow him onto the kitchen, where they found some clean cups. Going over to the water pump, both men soon had their quota of water.

“Joe, any time you want to leave, just give me the word and I will ask no questions. We will leave.”

“Thanks pa,” Joe replied. Sitting the cup back on the counter, he turned to Ben, “But I’m not ready yet.”

Setting their cups back onto the counter, Joe led the way out of the kitchen towards the door they had entered in from. As he moved in between tables, he looked up to see Ben opening a door leading from the wall next to him. Catching his breath, Joe cried out, “Don’t go there!”

Puzzled, Ben stopped and looked over at his son. Breathing heavily, it looked as though he was about to pass out as he swayed in front of him. Letting go of the door, Ben darted over to him and gently sat him down onto one of the benches. Watching as his son tried to fight the emotions, Joe finally lifted his head, “I’m sorry pa, I just remembered what happened the last time I went out that door.”

“What happened son?”

Glancing over at Ben, Joe turned and looked towards the door as he recalled the last time he had approached the door. Loosing all sense of where he was at the moment, Joe stood up from the bench and grasped hold of the doorknob. Holding on to it as though it was his lifeline, Joe stepped back into the past as his voice began to shake, “I opened this door and slipped through the doorway. Quietly I pulled the door shut, and then looked down the hall. Off in the distance, I could see a faint glimmer of sunshine, and the sunshine beckoned me to it. I wanted that sunshine, I wanted it bad.” Opening the door, Joe stepped through the opening, still lost in his trance. Getting up from the table, Ben followed him as he walked down the hallway, towards what he could see a definite stream of sunshine filtering in. Transfixed by the sunshine, Joe walked towards it as he continued to talk out loud. “I’m getting so close to it, I can almost feel the rays of sunshine on my face. Reaching out, my hand is getting closer to the door.” Stopping Joe suddenly seemed to realize where he was, and turned to face Ben. “I almost made it to this door pa, but hands grabbed me and threw me to the ground. It was then,” pausing, he swallowed hard, “that I was put in the room for the water treatment.”

Watching his son as he composed himself, Ben had such a longing for his son that he couldn’t help but reach over and give him a hug. Glancing at the door behind his son, he could see sunlight filtering in through the cracks of the door and was suddenly curious as to where the other side led. Twisting the handle, he pushed against the door, but it was stuck. Whether from warping or lack of use Ben wasn’t sure, but he stood there and pushed against it until the door let loose flinging him out into the bright sunshine. Blinking rapidly, Ben shaded his eyes as he looked around him. Off in the distance, he could barely make out the shape of a shed, but beyond that there was nothing enclosing them to the asylum. Hearing a noise behind him, Ben turned to see Joe walking over towards him.

“Pa, there’s nothing out here,” Joe said as he looked around at the barren landscape. Looking off into the distance, he tried to think of where he would have gone had he escaped. Noticing the shed that Ben also had noticed, he wondered briefly what it was doing there. But before either one of them could make a motion in that direction, they heard a shout that sounded vaguely like Hoss’s coming from the hallway. Pulling the door shut behind them, Joe led the way as they ran through the building to the sound. Slowing down around one of the corners, Joe stopped suddenly. There was Adam, Hoss, and Dr. Nickels, helping lift up Miss Dix from the floor. Following their gazes, he saw that Dr. Percale had found them. Bolting forward, Ben grabbed Joe by his arm and shook his head, pushing his son behind him.

“What’s the meaning of this?”

Watching as the newest addition to the group turned to him, Ben couldn’t help but want to tremor in his own shoes. The man looked evil, purely evil. Subconsciously, Ben tried to hide his youngest son with his body, as the man turned his attention to him.

“I recognize you, in fact, I recognize all of you,” he muttered, as he stared at Ben. “I just can’t place where I know you.”

Standing behind Ben, Joe could hear the sound of the doctor’s voice as it grated on his nerves. Feeling the edges of fear lace through his body, he relaxed somewhat when he remembered that he was here with his family. Sighing softly to himself, he could feel his breath wheeze as he breathed within. Trying to fight the urge to cough, Joe moved slightly away and tried backing around the corner just as an explosive cough left his mouth. Yanking his handkerchief out of his pocket, he tried to muffle the sound but was a second too late. With his eyes widening, he watched the eyes of Dr. Percale peer around his pa and look deep into his eyes.

“IT’S YOU!”

Cowering slightly in the shadows, Joe tried not to show the doctor just how scared he really was. Focusing on the lantern hanging in the doctor’s hand, Joe chewed on his bottom lip as he lifted the cloth to his nose and blew his nose. Barely nodding, he acknowledged the doctor’s presence, while the doctor looked around the group flustered. Seeing how disturbed the doctor seemed to be in Joe’s presence, Miss Dix continued with her discussion, “As you know Dr. Percale, in England this type of facility was not permitted. And with the mayor’s help, this one will be closed down.”

“Is that a threat?”

“You may take it anyway you see fit doctor,” she replied, as she lifted her head another notch.

Squeezing his lips forward, he snarled, “You will pay for this. I swore that you would never get in my way again, and I meant it.”

Pushing his way through the group, he took a moment longer to breathe his foul breath into Joe’s face, “And you haven’t seen the last of me.”

Pulling Joe away from the madman, Ben held his son firmly in his arms as he watched the doctor stride away. Feeling his son shake, he listened with horror at the coughing that erupted. Banging on his back, he tried to help loosen the phlegm that congregated deep inside his chest. Watching as Dr. Nickles pushed his way over to Joe, he relaxed slightly to know that a competent doctor was in their midst. Placing his hand on Joe’s forehead, the doctor muttered to himself. “This boy is hot.”

“I’m fine,” muttered Joe, as he looked into the doctor’s eyes. Feeling a tickle begin deep in his chest, he again started to cough violently, trying to catch his breath. Spitting out the contents of his mouth, he could taste the salty substance as it left his mouth. Leaning against the wall, he begged, “Really, I’m fine. Let me just rest somewhere, and I’ll be okay.”

Pushing a door open next to them, Adam looked around the room and saw a rickety chair leaning against the wall, closest to the door. Grabbing hold of it, he set it down next to Joe, insisting that he sit. “Here’s a chair Joe. You need to rest.”

Sagging into the chair, Joe hated to admit that he was feeling bad. But when he came face to face with Dr. Percale, it felt as though all his energy was sapped out of him. Looking up into the concerned faces around him, he felt trapped sitting there. “Please go on,” he begged, “don’t let me stop you.”

Walking over to Joe, Miss Dix leaned down and spoke to him. “I want to know you are okay Joe. What you’ve been through today has been a lot, and then to top it off you have no warning and you come face to face with Dr. Percale. It is draining for you.” Looking up at Ben, she noted his and his other son’s concern, before turning back to Joe. “Why don’t you go back outside and rest, there at the entrance where the horses are?”

Dropping his head down, Joe didn’t want to admit his weakness, but at that point he was tired. So very tired. Listening to her suggestion he nodded, as he continued to sit there. Lifting his hand, he weakly motioned, “Go on, I’ll be fine, I’ll meet you guys out front.”

Looking at him, they were unsure, but knew of his disgust is being so weak in front of everyone. Nodding their heads, Hoss spoke up, “Go on and rest little brother, because I’m buying you the best meal tonight that Reno can provide.”

Grinning, Joe nodded as he watched Hoss and Adam move away with the others, leaving his pa standing next to him. After resting there for a few minutes, Joe could feel some of his energy return. Hearing the deep voice of his pa, Joe turned his head up to listen.

“What do you say we head back?”

“Sounds good pa.”

Pushing his hands against the chair, Joe carefully stood up from the seat as he felt the beginnings of a headache. Going down the hallway in the direction the others had ventured down just minutes ago, they came upon a crossroad of hallways when Joe faltered in his footsteps. The surroundings seemed vaguely familiar, but he was having trouble placing where he was. Looking down at his feet, he saw a trickle of water running alongside his boot, when with a jolt he suddenly remembered where he was. He was standing next to the water treatment room. Turning to Ben, he was about to speak when suddenly a sharp stabbing pain entered his head at the same moment he saw his pa sink to the ground. With the word “pa” on his unspoken on his lips, Joe sank into darkness.

********************

“Pa!”

Ben slowly opened his eyes. Feeling hands slapping at his face, he moved slightly, gasping when he felt a pain shoot through his head. Reaching up with his hand, he cradled the sore spot on his head just as he saw hands reaching down to help him sit up. “What happened?”

“We were hoping you could tell us,” Adam answered. Looking over at the doctor as he bent down and examined Ben, Adam glanced over at Hoss.

“Ouch!”

“I know that hurts,” the doctor replied as he prodded the swollen area. “It looks as though you were hit with a blunt object and it knocked you out.”

“How long have I been here?”

Shaking his head, the doctor had to admit, “I don’t know. We came upon you about thirty minutes ago, but I don’t know how long you were here before then.”

Suddenly realizing that someone was missing, Ben began to frantically look around him, “Where’s Joe? Joe? Where are you?” Pushing himself to his feet, Ben swayed as he tried to push past the doctor in an attempt to find his youngest.

“Pa,” Hoss began, “we don’t know where Joe is. We thought you might know.”

“I… I don’t know,” Ben replied with something that resembled a sob. “We were coming to where the hallway crossed in front of us. He paused, and then I saw him turn to me just as I felt something hit me on the back of my head. I don’t know anything else beyond that.” Pushing aside Hoss, he was desperate to find Joe, “Where is he? Is he okay?”

Concerned, Hoss looked over at the doctor, “We done told him we don’t know where Joe is.”

“He has a concussion,” Dr. Nickel’s explained, “and he isn’t thinking clearly right now. The only thing on his mind is Joseph.”

“We gotta find Joe,” Hoss demanded. Sending his fist into the wall, he pulled it back with a yelp as one of the rough edges plowed across his fist. Examining it, he didn’t see any puncture marks. “Will our pa be okay?”

“He needs to rest and lie down, but he will be okay.”

Nodding his head, Adam turned to the doctor and asked, “Do you think you manage our pa for a while? We need to find Joe.”

Reaching down to Ben, the doctor helped him stand up as he turned to face Adam, “Go find your brother, Miss Dix and I will take your pa to the waiting room.”

Concerned for Ben, Adam stood there as he watched as the doctor and Miss Dix led Ben down the hallway before turning to Hoss. “Do you think you can figure out what happened here?”

“Don’t know Adam, but I’m going to try my darndest to find out.”

Kneeling down, Hoss motioned for Adam to bring the light down to his level. “There’s a lot of footprints here, and a lot of them are ours, but this is the one that interests me.” Pointing to a pair of footprints leading away from the grouping, “This here, I can’t be certain, but I’m guessing it was Little Joe.” Then pointing to a spot that had drag marks Hoss continued, “Then this here, looks like some one was drug away from this spot.”

Nodding, Adam agreed with Hoss’s assessment as he continued to hold the lamp as Hoss stood up. Taking the lamp from Adam’s hand, he followed the tracks down the hallway not paying attention to where they were headed, until they came to a door. Looking up at it, they could see sunlight filtering in through the cracks of the wooden door. Pushing on the door, the door wouldn’t budge until they put a little more strength behind it. Hearing the cracking of the door as it swung open they were suddenly engulfed in bright sunshine. Blinking their eyes rapidly in the rays of the sunlight, they shaded their eyes noticing the sun sinking off into the western sky. Looking across the landscape, Adam nearly stumbled into Hoss who had stopped to stare down at the tracks.

“Look here, Adam.”

Moving closer to Hoss, Adam looked down to where his brother pointed. The tracks that they had been following inside continued outside and looked to be headed to the west. Looking in that direction, both men could vaguely make out the shape of a shed in the shadows of the sinking sun in the distance. Without a word, both men glanced at each other and then nodded before following the tracks that led them directly to the shed.

********************

Moaning, Joe’s eyes slowly began to flutter open just as a wave of nausea went swimming through his stomach. Rolling over to his side, he couldn’t help but groan in pain as splinters of pain went shooting through his head. Reaching up with his hand, he tenderly touched the back of his head as he panted from the lack of oxygen that was making it into his lungs. Swinging his eyes around, he had no idea where he was, nor how he came to where he was currently. A low ceiling swooped down upon him, with a mess of crates and boxes lining the edge of the room. The walls were thrown together in a slip-shod manner, allowing slivers of daylight to come streaming in. Blinking his eyes rapidly, Joe could barely make out the figure of two people standing across the room. Rubbing his eyes, he slowly pushed himself up from the floor just as a breath of wheezing came through his chest. Coughing, he tried to loosen to mixture, belatedly realizing that it also announced that he was awake. Not able to help it, Joe bent over as a rather particular hard coughing spell passed through his lips. Spitting, Joe looked up and could see the forms of two people looking down at him. With a sigh, he recognized one of them as Dr. Percale, and the other one was the older woman who had let them into the asylum earlier that day. Coughing once more, Joe swallowed hard as he asked, “What do you want?”

“You know what I want,” snarled Dr. Percale.

Almost faint from lack of hunger, he suddenly wished he had listened to his family when they insisted he eat more that morning. Exasperated with the doctor, he demanded, “I don’t know what you want, and I don’t know why I’m here!”

“You were bad, and now you must be punished?” Dr. Percale answered as saliva flew from his mouth.

“What do you mean?” Joe asked, as he looked curiously up at the woman. He had seen her before, and it wasn’t until he looked down at her hand holding a needle that he remembered just where he had seen her last. She was the nurse who had given Dr. Percale the needle the last time he had been in the institution.

Waving the needle, she pointed it at Joe as she spoke, “Dr. Percale wants ta make ya an example to them others. Ya can’t go around killin’ people and thinkin’ ya can get away with it.”

“You’re crazy! I didn’t kill anyone!”

Motioning towards the woman, Dr. Percale explained, “We need to get rid of this evil that is within him. Mabel, give me the needle.”

Tense, Joe lay on the ground as he watched the woman handed the needle over to the doctor. Jumping from his position, Joe lunged towards the doctor, knocking the needle from his hand watching as it rolled into a dark corner of the shed. Sending a blow to the doctor’s head, Joe watched with satisfaction as the doctor sank to the floor. Before he could throw another punch, Joe felt a blow to his shoulders from a wooden plank thrown by the nurse as he sank to the floor in a world of pain. Rolling over onto his side, he tried to draw his legs up and kick, but was too late. He could feel the weight Dr. Percale and the nurse as they dropped down on him, holding him down onto the floor. Joe shivered from a feeling of alternating cold and hot as he struggled desperately from their hold while begging, “Please, why are you doing this to me?”

“I told you already. You killed my mother you son-of-a…”

Dumbfounded, Joe’s mouth dropped open as he listened to the accusation, “Your mother? I didn’t kill anyone!”

“Yes you did,” the doctor spat. “You killed my mother! She was the most precious thing in my life, yet you snuffed her life right out of her.” Gasping, Dr. Percale’s eyes got a faraway look as he looked down at Joe. Laughing he continued, “You thought you were getting it easy going to an asylum, but I made sure I was put in charge of yours! You will never rest in peace as long as I am here to make sure you are tortured for killing my mother! You almost got away when you died, but I knew you were faking it! I knew!”

Trying to push away, Joe begged to be heard, “I didn’t kill your mother. Let me go, and we can talk about this.”

“Don’t lie to me Ernest Hardwell! You killed my mother!” Lifting his hand, Joe didn’t even have time to duck as the doctor’s hand came flying through the air and hit him squarely in the face.

“I didn’t!” Joe could still feel his face stinging and pulsating from the pain caused by the punch. For such a puny man, he packed a lot of power in his fists. Looking over at the woman, he watched as a look of puzzlement covered her face, as she turned to look at Dr. Percale. Sensing her interest in what was being said, Joe begged, “Please ma’am, my name is Joe. You saw my pa out there, I didn’t kill his ma.”

Still holding onto Joe’s feet, she leaned back slightly, which help release some of the pain that he was feeling in his knees. Shaking her head, she continued to listen with growing amazement at the doctor as he continued to rant about Joe killing his mother. Slowly she pushed herself from the floor, lifting her body from Joe’s legs and was in the process of moving away when the doctor turned to her. “Where do you think you are going Mabel?”

“I… I… I don’t think we need to be doin’ this to this here boy.”

“You get back,” he snarled, as he reached up with one hand and grabbed her by the wrist. Flinging her to the ground, his attention was focused on her as he released his tense stronghold on Joe.

Taking advantage of the loosened grasp on him, Joe squirmed in his captor’s arm hold and pulled his body from the doctor’s arms, then threw his body with full force against the doctor’s body. Breaking loose the doctor’s hold on Mabel, both Joe and the doctor tumbled around on the floor of the shed. As the doctor threw punches into Joe’s stomach, Joe could tell that the exertion spent to fight and block the doctor was quickly using up his resources. Congestion was building in his chest, and Joe knew that unless he was able to break free from the doctor’s hold, he was going to end up passing out on the floor of the shed. Reaching out, Joe punched the doctor in the jaw, and was barely able to crawl away as he watched the doctor fall away from him. It gave him just enough time as he gave way to a spasm of coughing that had been building up in his lungs. Bending over, Joe was busy trying to catch his breath from coughing and wasn’t paying attention to what the doctor was doing, assuming that he was still flat on his back after the blow he took from Joe. Taking a deep breath, Joe turned and from his side vision watched as the doctor slowly stood from the floor and came lunging towards him. It was a glint of sunshine reflected off the glass casing of the needle that sent fear through Joe’s veins. Just as the doctor brought his hand plunging down towards Joe’s inert figure, Joe gasped out and frantically looked around him for some sort of defense, when he saw a flash of clothing dart in front of him. Shocked, Joe watched in puzzlement as Mabel dropped to the ground in front of him, her dress fluttering down around her. Shocked, Joe looked down into the face of Mabel, her eyes blinking rapidly as the light quickly faded from them. Looking across her, his eyes caught hold of the needle, which stood up from her chest, pierced directly into her heart.

Scrambling from the body, Joe tried to stand up as he felt the doctor’s arms wrap around his ankles, sending him to the ground again. Frantically Joe kicked out, not knowing where he was aiming, just trying to get away from him. Scooting away, he aimed for the sunlight, and soon found that he was trapped in the corner of the shed, when he heard the doctor’s manacle laughter as it echoed through the shed. Trapped with no place to go, Joe looked up and gasped. The doctor was standing before him, with a pitchfork held unwavering in his hands, aimed directly at him. Frantically, Joe stood up and sought for some sort of defense but came up with nothing. Unwilling to die, Joe closed his eyes as he heard the doctor’s cry out, “You killed my mother! And now I will kill you!” Waiting for the plunge of the pitchfork, Joe heard the distant report of a gunshot just as a sharp pain jutted through his body. Feeling his body sag against the wall of the shed, he waited as he felt the darkness from the edges of his consciousness seep towards him. Hearing footsteps, he struggled to open his eyes.

“Adam… Hoss…” Joe whispered, as another cough ravaged his already sore and beaten body.

Feeling pain edge into his consciousness, Joe tried to pull his body from the ground. Gasping out, he clutched his arm as he looked down at his side. Next to him laid the pitchfork having grazed his left arm, it lay there with a splatter of blood covering one of the tines. Blinking, Joe had a hard time comprehending what happened. “What… what… happened?”

“Don’t you know little brother?” Adam asked, as he bent down to look at Joe’s arm.

“He was going to kill me.” Looking up in puzzlement, he glanced over towards the motionless body lying on the ground just beyond Hoss. “He aimed the pitchfork directly at me. I thought I was going to die.”

Belatedly, Hoss and Adam realized what had transpired just moments before they dove their way into the shed. Having heard the doctor’s cries, they had shot without ever realizing that the man held a pitchfork aloft in his hand. Dropping to his knees, Hoss shoved the pitchfork out of eyesight and put his hands behind Joe’s back, helping him sit up. “You’re safe now, little brother.”

Walking over to the man lying on the ground, Adam couldn’t help but push him with his foot to make sure he was dead. Reaching down, he felt for a pulse. Nothing. Even in death, he held a sardonic grin on his face. Standing back up, he went over to where Hoss had hold of Joe.

Briefly smiling up at them, Joe couldn’t help but moan as the pressure from his head and the pulsating pain from his arm weakened his body further. Leaning Joe forward, Hoss pulled him into his arms as he slowly stood from the ground.

Protesting, Joe weakly complained, “I can walk.”

“Sure you can Joe,” Hoss replied, as he looked down into his face. Drops of sweat covered his brother’s face, and he could tell from where he stood that Joe was burning with fever inside. Looking over at Adam, Hoss couldn’t help but comment, “He has a fever, and I think we need to get him over to the doctor as soon as possible.”

Nodding, Adam looked around the room and located a discarded blanket lying on top of some boxes next to the wall. Stumbling over something on the ground, he bent down and recognized the shape of a woman, then as he leaned closer, he realized with a shock that it was the woman that had welcomed them inside earlier in the day. Not sure of what happened to her, he bent down and felt for a pulse. Nothing. Standing up, a ray of sunlight glanced across her dress, shining a fraction of light onto some glass. Kneeling down, Adam took a closer look and saw a syringe of liquid plunged into her heart. Shaking his head, Adam stood back up, and reached over to grab the blanket. Shaking it free of dirt, he followed his brother’s outdoors and for a moment enjoyed looking around the softly hued landscape just before the sun set below the horizon. Moving over to where Hoss stood, he discreetly watched as Joe stood swaying next to Hoss.

Tapping Joe on the shoulder, Adam asked, “We have quite a distance before we make it back to the asylum. Let’s get something on your arm here, so it can slow the bleeding.”

Joe looked into Adam’s face and tried to make sense of what he was saying. There was such a roar developing in his head that he just nodded while hoping that was the answer being sought. Watching as Adam ripped part of the blanket, Joe cringed in pain as he felt Adam grab hold of his arm and tie the blanket around his injury. Crying out, he felt a tickle in his throat, as he yet again felt the urge to cough overtake him. Grabbing hold of Hoss, Joe exploded in an effort of coughing as he felt himself sag to the ground.

Watching as Joe passed out, Hoss reached down and caught him before he collapsed to the ground. “Let’s get him to the doc.” Holding him in his arms, Hoss watched as Adam tossed the blanket across Joe’s body. Tucking and tugging at it he made sure that it covered his brother’s exposed arms. Having seen the chills that were dancing across his brother’s skin, Adam wanted to make sure that they were able to keep him as comfortable as possible.

Step after step they took, until finally they saw the outline of the asylum come into view. Seeing figures in the front of the asylum, Hoss sighed as he shifted the weight in his arms.

“Want me to carry him Hoss?”

Grunting, Hoss declined, “No thanks, why don’t you go ahead find the doctor?”

Nodding, Adam sprinted forward towards the crowd. Recognizing his pa, Miss Dix and the doctor, there were others milling around that Adam didn’t recognize. Panting, he stood in front of Ben, “Pa. We got Joe.”

Breaking from the crowd, Ben ran towards Hoss as Adam took a moment to look around the group. Most of them were well dressed, so he knew they were not from inside the asylum. As he pushed his way through the group, he heard low murmurs of talk, but couldn’t comprehend what was being said. His thoughts had a sole purpose and that was to get medical help for his brother. Grabbing the doctor’s arm, he pulled him inside the building. “What’s going on outside?” But before the doctor could explain, Adam waved the question away, “Never mind that, my brother Joe, he’s burning up with fever and was stabbed with a pitchfork.”

Not listening to what else Adam had to say, the doctor spun around and began gathering supplies for when Joe was brought in. Hearing voices behind him, Adam turned to see Ben pushing people out of the way as Hoss followed behind him with Joe still in his arms. Slamming the door shut behind them, Adam cleared a spot on one of the couches and motioned for them to bring Joe there. Moving aside, he watched as Hoss carefully laid his burden down, arranging Joe’s arm so they were on top of his body instead of flopping down off the couch. Dr. Nickels, seeing that Joe was in place pushed through the Cartwright men and dropped down to the side of the couch. Rifling through his bag, he found his stethoscope and with his other hand, pulled back Joe’s shirt, baring a spot where he could rest the instrument. Listening to his heart, he nodded his head as he looked up towards Ben and commented, “Strong heart.” Digging into his bag once more, he pulled out a few more items and laid them down beside him, as he took one and coaxed it into Joe’s mouth. Too exhausted to care about the thermometer, Joe let it slide into his mouth as he lay there and sighed. Watching as Joe tried to speak, the doctor hushed him quickly. “Shhh, no talking. Let’s get you taken care of before you say anything else.” Upon hearing that, Joe physically relaxed his body, allowing his body to sag into the cushions. Continuing his examination of the young man, the doctor reached for a pair of scissors and cut the sleeve of the arm that had been stabbed. Gently pulling away the shirt that was embedded in the blood from the wound, he carefully began pulling it from the dried blood. At the tugging of the wound, fresh blood sprang from the cuts, causing the doctor to wrap some cloth around it to staunch the flow. Applying pressure, after a few minutes he pulled back the cotton and began probing the cut. Two long cuts grazed the edge of Joe’s arm, while a third one just pierced the inside of his forearm. More concerned about that cut, the doctor poured some liquid on the cuts, watching as the liquid sizzled. Hearing Joe’s low moan, the doctor said, “Almost through here Joe.” Remembering the thermometer that was in Joe’s mouth, he pulled it out and looked at it. Nodding slightly, he laid it aside as he continued to care for the cut on the injured man’s arm. Intently working on his arm, he finally let out a sigh as he securely tied the bandage. Laying his hand against Joe’s face the doctor looked up to the men around him. Smiling slightly, he patted Joe on the shoulder and spoke, “This young man will do well if he gets several days of rest. He will do the best if he is in bed, and stays in bed until this infection can be fought.” Standing up, he moved to the side of Joe and began putting the items back into the bag.

“But how is he?” Ben asked, as he took the doctor’s place beside his son. Sitting down, he glanced over at Joe, his eyes closed and his lips barely parted as he breathed.

“He’s running a temperature, but his lungs are clear. If you can get him to stay in bed he has a chance that this won’t turn into pneumonia. But any more days like this one, it is guaranteed that he will be in bed for several weeks.” Snapping his bag shut, he continued, “The cuts on his arm should heal up well. I put some antiseptic on it, so it should fight the germs that were embedded into his arm from the pitchfork.”

“Thank God,” Ben exclaimed. Sighing, he brushed the hair back from Joe’s face he replied “I don’t think I could stand the thought of losing him again to that madman.” Looking over to where Hoss and Adam stood, hovering next to the doorway he asked, “What happened to Dr. Percale?”

Clearing his throat, Adam answered, “He’s dead.”

“How…”

Waving away any further questions, Adam suggested, “Why don’t we talk about it later?”

Nodding, Ben looked back down at his son and patted away some of the sweat that was sending rivers of moisture down his neck. Looking over at Hoss, he motioned him to him. “I think Miss Dix is outside with the townspeople. See if she is ready to go, and we will put Joe in the buggy with her and the doctor.”

Pursing his lips, Hoss turned and did as he was instructed. Hearing the door close Ben stood up from the couch and found a blanket lying on a table next to the wall. Pulling it loose from its folds, he carried it over to Joe and tucked it around him. Hearing the door open behind him, he turned and saw that Hoss had reentered the room.

“Pa, Miss Dix is ready to go when you are. The townspeople,” Hoss continued, “are talking about getting the inmates out of here, but they ain’t sure where to take them yet. But Miss Dix is ready whenever you are.”

Nodding, Ben moved away from the couch and allowed Hoss to approach Joe. Rearranging the blanket awakened Joe from his brief sleep, “Hey brother.” Swallowing, he looked up into Hoss’s blue eyes, “What’s going on?”

“We’re heading back to Reno,” Hoss answered. “Just as soon as I get you into the buggy with Miss Dix.”

Waving away Hoss’s hands, Joe protested, “No, let me walk on my own.”

“But..”

“You can help me,” Joe pleaded, “but let me walk on my own.”

Shrugging his shoulders, Hoss looked over towards Adam and Ben as he moved closer to the couch. Watching as his brother carefully pulled himself from the couch he was there when a wave of unsteadiness sent a sheet of whiteness across Joe’s face. Reaching out, he put his arm around his younger brother’s shoulders and under his armpit helping him stand steady. Glancing over towards Adam, he gave a slight nod just barely enough for his older brother to see. Walking over to where his two brothers stood, Adam took the other side of Joe and hooked his arm just under Hoss’s, helping as Joe took a few steps towards the door. They could softly hear him mutter, “Thanks.” Pushing the door open, they shouldered their way past a group of men standing near the door, hearing the softened voices around them, yet unable to make out what was being said. They parted the way, allowing the three of them to walk from the building towards where the doctor standing next to the buggy while Miss Dix sat inside with a concerned look on her face.

Grabbing hold of the side of the buggy, Joe could feel the hands helping him into the buggy. The energy that he had felt when laying on the couch had evaporated once he stood, however he didn’t like the idea of being carried out of the building. The last time he had left the asylum he was in his brother’s arms, and he didn’t really care to experience it twice. This time when he left the place, it would be on his two feet. Settling down into the seat next to Miss Dix, Joe let out a sigh as his buttocks came in contact with the cushion. Sinking back against the buggy, he gave a half smile of thanks towards his brothers as a fit of coughing over took him.

“You okay, Joe?”

“Yeah, Hoss,” Joe breathed in as he waved his brother away. “I’m fine. Thanks.” Settling into the seat, he watched as his brothers turned slightly away from him, watching as Ben brought the horses to them. His eyes then caught sight of the lingering crowd of people outside of the asylum. “Miss Dix?”

“Yes Joe?”

“Why are all these people here?”

Clearing her throat, Miss Dix glanced towards the people before answering, “They are deciding what to do about the asylum. This is the first time that they have been able to see and visit the facility first hand. Now that Dr. Percale is dead, they will have to decide what to do with the inmates.”

Nodding, he looked around and watched as his pa brought the horses over to his brother’s. Watching as they climbed on, he shook himself out of his reverie as he heard his pa’s voice, “Come on, let’s head back to town.” Leaning his head against the back of the buggy, the gait of horses soon put him to sleep, as his head slowly slipped down from the back of the buggy and rested on Miss Dix’s shoulder.

********************

“Pa!” Joe protested, as he tried to move from his bed. Frustrated at being confined to the bed, he tossed the covers from his body, “I feel fine!”

“You will stay right there, just as the doctor ordered,” Ben replied, getting just as frustrated with his stubborn son. “When he says you can get up, then you can. Not before then.” Leaving the room, he threw a look at his son telling him that he meant what he said.

Glaring back, Joe crossed his arms across his chest and muttered to himself. “I’m fine. Why can’t anyone see that?” Stretching out his arm, he tapped on his bandaged arm as he tried to guess at what point of healing it was. Looking around, he didn’t see or hear anyone as he slowly slid his fingers to the knot. Ungracefully untying the bandage, he unwound it from his arm and just as it slipped to the floor a sound at the doorway caused him to jump, banging his arm on the side of the bed.

“OWW!”

Rolling his eyes, Adam walked over to the bed and stared down at his youngest brother. Shaking his head, he bent down and retrieved the bandage as he held it dangling in the air, “Why is this off your arm?”

“Are you the doctor?” Joe asked sullenly. Holding onto his arm, he could still feel the red-hot pain shoot through his veins as he held his breath, hoping to keep the pain at bay.

“No, but he is,” Adam replied as he stepped outside of the room for the white-haired man to enter into the room.

“Good morning Joseph.”

“Morning,” he replied, with a touch of frustration in his tone. Watching as the doctor moved to sit down on the edge of the bed, Joe moved slightly over to make room for him.

Setting his bag down on the chair next to him, the doctor turned his attention on his sullen patient. “How are you doing this morning?”

“Fine.”

“Good, good,” the doctor nodded as he reached his hand up to Joe’s forehead. Resting the back of his hand briefly on his forehead, he glanced into Joe’s face. “Well, your fever is gone, so that is good. Now,” he said as he dug into his bag, “if you would remove your shirt, I’ll take a listen at your chest.” Carefully unbuttoning his shirt, Joe laid his injured arm down as he continued the task with his well arm. Sliding it off his shoulders, he sat up in bed bare-chested as the doctor placed the cold end of the stethoscope against his skin. Removing it, he then leaned Joe forward and placed the stethoscope on his back as he listened to his lungs. Patting Joe on the shoulder, he leaned the young man back against the pillows and tucked the stethoscope back into his bag. “Are you coughing any more?”

“No,” Joe replied, realizing that he was close to getting a clean bill of health.

“Yes,” echoed Ben from the doorway. Sensing his son’s glare at him, Ben continued, “But it isn’t as bad as it was at the first of the week.”

Smiling at Joe, the doctor nodded his head as he answered, “Your lungs are clear, and any coughing is just some congestion that has built up. Cough it out, but don’t over due it and you should be okay.”

Pulling his shirt back onto his shoulders, Joe began to button up his shirt just as the doctor spoke again. “Not so fast young man. I need to check your arm out before I give the okay,” he said as he took hold of Joe’s arm, “the arm that you have so generously removed the bandage from.”

Making a face, Joe dropped his other hand from his shirt as he leaned back against the pillow and watched the doctor work. Probing the cuts, he pushed on the cuts to make sure there was no pus buildup below the skin. Watching Joe’s reaction to his probing, the doctor grunted in satisfaction, as he released Joe’s arm and turned to his patient. “Congratulations. You are allowed out…”

Interrupting the doctor’s words, Joe let out a yell of glee as he sent his legs sliding off the bed. Feeling someone grab hold of the movement, he stopped and glanced down, then followed the arm back towards the doctor.

“As I was about to say, you are allowed out of this bed as long as you take it easy. This arm is not completely healed up, so that means you still have to take it easy.”

“Can I go home?”

Looking over at Ben, the doctor shook his head. “You warned me about him asking to go home, Ben, but I refused to listen didn’t I? Looks like I owe you a dinner at the hotel.”

Laughing, Ben walked over to the bed and slapped the doctor on the shoulder. “What do you say I take you on it this evening? I have a feeling that we are headed home tomorrow morning.”

“So?” Joe questioned, “Can I can get up?”

“Stay in the hotel room, and you may,” Ben replied. Hearing a knock at the outside door, he moved from the doorway and watched as Adam went to answer the door.

“Good afternoon Adam.”

“Hello Miss Dix,” Adam replied, as he motioned her in. “Come on in and have a seat, the doctor is in the other room with Joe right now.”

“How is Joe doing?”

At the sound of his name, Joe walked into the room and greeted the older woman with a smile. “I’m doing great. Given a clean bill of health, and the doc says I can go home.”

“Wait a second, young man,” the doctor piped in. “I never said anything about going home, I just said that your pa had won a meal.”

“But.. but..?”

Laughing, both Ben and the doctor shared a laugh at Joe’s crestfallen face. “I’m sorry Joe,” the doctor apologized, “I’m just teasing you. I hope you have a safe journey home tomorrow.” Nodding his head towards Dorthea, he smiled a greeting towards her. “Mr. Cartwright and I are headed down to the hotel dining room for a meal, would you like to join us Miss Dix?”

Returning the doctor’s smile, she replied, “I’d love to, but first I want to tell you what the townspeople decided the night before about the asylum.” Glancing over at Ben, she continued, “ They decided to ship all the inmates to Sacremento, to their facility there.”

“What are they going to do about the asylum?” Adam asked as he leaned against the doorframe.

“They’re not sure right now. They are going to leave it as is for now.”

Piping up from the doorway, Joe suggested, “I think you ought to just burn the place down.”

“Are all the inmates out?” the doctor asked.

“Yes they are, and they are on their way to Sacramento right now.”

Moving away from the doorway, Adam could feel the door opening as he spoke, “Sounds like you did a great job, Miss Dix.” Seeing the sight of his middle brother pushing through the doorway, he waited for him to enter before moving back over.

“Thank you Adam,” Dorthea replied, as she stood from her seat. “But I couldn’t have done any of this without your family and the doctor’s help.”

“Evening Miss Dix, doctor,” Hoss greeted before turning his attention to Ben. “I got them supplies like you wanted, and they are ready to be packed away. The mercantile will be open for another hour, and wanted to know if there was anything else you needed.”

Glancing over at Joe, and then at Ben, Adam tugged Hoss by the arm and urged for him to follow him outside the room where he could speak with his brother quietly. “There is one more thing that you can pick up, and that is some kerosene.”

“Kerosene?” Hoss exclaimed, “Whatever for?”

“Shhhhh…” Adam replied, as he glanced over his shoulder watching to see any one had heard Hoss’s outburst. “I’ll walk over to the mercantile with you and explain it.”

Leaning against the wall, Joe watched with a look of surrealism when Adam pulled Hoss into the hallway, before peeking back in a few moments later. Saying something to Ben, Adam grabbed his hat then closed the door behind him. Not even caring what was being said, Joe sat there feeling his energy from just a few moments again slowly seep from his body as he felt himself sagging against the wall down into the chair. Hunger seemed to pervade his body, and it was the lack of food that was making him feel faint. Figuring that sitting down on his own was better than fainting on the floor, Joe tried to look as inconspicuous as he could as he rested his face in his hands. The grumbling in his stomach began, and must have been loud because suddenly all talk stopped in the room. Looking up from his hands, Joe looked up into the smiling faces of the doctor and his pa.

“Hungry son?”

Smiling, Joe nodded as another growl rumbled through his stomach. “Yeah, I think I could almost eat an entire cow.”

“Let’s save that for when we get back to the Ponderosa,” Ben suggested. Grabbing his son’s jacket and hat, he plopped the hat on his head as he reached over to help Joe up from the chair. Not surprised by Joe’s refusal for help, Ben handed him the jacket and stood close by in case he needed help. With Joe standing, and Miss Dix near the door, Ben followed them and the doctor out of the room as he closed the door tight behind him.

********************

“Pa?” questioned Joe as he saw the direction they were taking from town. “Where are we going?”

Glancing over at his two other son’s, Ben paused a moment before answering. “We are stopping off at the asylum.”

“Why there?”

“There was some unfinished business,” Ben answered. Looking off in the distance, he could see the faint outline of the asylum shadowed against the rising sun. Taking a look at his youngest son, he could tell that puzzlement had overshadowed his questions as he stared at the building in front of them. Trying to get Joe’s mind off the approaching building, Ben spoke, “I hear that Miss Dix is headed back to Boston on the next stagecoach.”

Reining his horse towards Ben, Adam rode up next to him, “Yes, she’s taking back all the research and notes she made out here, and will be sharing the information with an assembly of doctor’s out there.” Noting Joe’s shocked look on his face, Adam continued, “However, our names will not be mentioned.” Watching Joe’s sigh of relief, Adam knew that he had guessed correctly the reason for his tension.

“Hey pa! We’re here!”

Hearing Hoss’s holler, everyone looked up to see the looming, empty building standing lonely on the landscape. “Pa, we got everything taken care of, and they took everyone out the day before, so there ain’t anyone inside.”

Nodding, Ben suggested, “Why don’t you take one more walk through to make sure no one is around?”

“Yes sir.” Climbing off his horse, Hoss proceeded to walk towards the building as Adam slid off his horse and joined him. Ben and Joe soon lost sight of the two of them as they disappeared around a corner into the building. Climbing down off his horse, Ben led it to some brush and tied the reins loosely around it as he waited for his sons to return. Looking around the area, his eye caught hold of Joe, still sitting on top of his horse. “Why don’t you get down son?”

“Huh?” he asked, as he was brought back to the present. “Oh yeah, okay.” Looping the reins around the saddle horn, he carefully slid down the horse and held the reins in his hand. “What are they doing inside pa?”

“Making sure it is empty.”

“But why?”

Before Ben could conjure up an answer, the doorframe to the front door of the asylum was filled with his older sons. “Pa,” Adam hollered, “the place is empty. We emptied out the rest of those cans in the back of the building, so it should go down quickly.”

Standing before them, Joe had a look of pure confusion on his face as he listened to the conversation. “What’s going on here?”

“There is one thing left to do before we leave here, Joe,” Ben answered. Handing out a match to his son, he motioned him towards the building. “We are going to burn it down, and giving you the honors of lighting the first match.”

Dumbfounded, Joe stood there with his mouth ajar as he stared at Ben. “Burn it down? Really? Did they say we can do this?”

Hearing a strangled sound from Adam’s throat, Joe turned to look at him. Waving away his interest, Adam motioned towards Hoss. “Well, it’s like this Joe,” Hoss answered as he pulled his hat off his head. Twisting it around in his hand, he chewed the inside of his mouth before speaking. “We figure they will be arguing and never really settling what to do with this place, that perhaps a natural catastrophe could happen, and the place would burn down. Like you know, a lightening storm or something.”

“Pa?” Joe questioned, as he turned to face him.

“Go ahead son. This is actually your idea, and your brother’s decided to take you up on it.”

Ben explained, as he turned to face his two eldest sons. “They came out here, and checked the place out before dousing it with kerosene. All it will take is one match, and this place will go up in flames.”

Listening to the words spoken, Joe had a slight grin on his face as he stood there with the match in his hand. Looking up at the building, he dropped his horse’s reins and took a few steps towards the front of the asylum. Kicking a rock out of his way, he slowly made his way to the front door and pushed it open. Suddenly assaulted by memories and smells, Joe struck the match on the side of the wall, smelling the sulfur when the match was lit. Holding the lighted match in his hand, Joe took a deep breath and with a mental good-bye to the place tossed the match to the floor, watching as it landed in a pool of liquid near his feet. Hearing a voice directly behind him, Joe was lost in this world when he felt a hand grab his arm and jerk him from the front door just as the interior of the room flared up and engulfed the room. In awe with the mighty power of the fire, Joe stood there not even feeling the arm still clasped to his hand as he felt the heat from the flames dance across his skin. Taking a few steps backwards, he watched as the flames ran up the sides of the brittle, dry wood eating everything in its way as it climbed up to the rafters, sending the entire place into a ball of flames. Hearing a voice, he turned slightly to see Hoss and Adam motioning for him to move away from the building. Taking a few steps backwards, he continued to watch the flames devour the building. The heat was intense, and just when it felt like the fire was going to bring him back into the building, he shook himself out of the fog and moved on his own away from the fire. Moving over to where Ben stood next to the horses, he stood there close to him watching as the flames danced in the sunlight, played with by a slight wind that sent the fire rushing through the rest of the building. Soon there was not one place left standing that wasn’t touched by the fire. Watching as the fire licked its way into the upper frames and rafters, it quickly ate through the wood bringing the front part of the asylum down in a thunderous roar. Feeling the wind created by the fire pick up, Ben stood next to Joe, arms wrapped around his shoulders as they together watched the fire demolish the rest of the building. Giving their young brother a brief clasp on the shoulder, Adam and Hoss moved away to gather the reins of their horses. As they departed, Ben felt a touch on his shoulder and turned to look at the soot covered face of his youngest son.

“Pa, thank you,” Joe began, “For everything pa. For being there for me, but for most of all this.” Sweeping his hands towards the asylum, they watched as the rafters in the back of the building fell down into a flaming mass into the rest of the fire. “This place won’t haunt my dreams anymore. I also realize Miss Dix will make sure that nothing like this will exist again.” Taking one more glance towards the fire, he whispered more to himself, “It’s gone, pa, it’s really and truly gone.” Feeling his horse nudge him on the shoulder, Joe gave Ben a quick hug before capturing the loose reins. Slipping his foot into the stirrup, he threw his leg over and suggested, “Let’s go home pa. Home.”

Without a final glance towards the smoldering ruins of the asylum, Joe kneed his horse in the ribs and galloped in the direction towards home, reaffirmed the knowledge of his family’s love and care for him. The strength and fortitude they showed him during this time had been amazing, as he rode along he could hear the hurried hoof beats of the horses carrying his family, in their need to catch up with him.

The End

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